| Username |
Post |
| forget-me-not |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 01:10 PM
Hello Sajhabasi haro,
You people seem expert in everything. Please help me out....What is the best way to say to a boy/girl that you don't love him/her...sounds funny ha...there are situations in life and you have to say to the person that you don't love him/her...You can'trisk to lose your friend, some relations are just best as friends... At least for me...
Bichara uni, kasto bijog, jaslai man parayo, usai bata rejection, ...then that was going on so far?? Being close and sharing things doesnot mean you two are in love, ki kaso??
Khai kasari define garu ma, situation garho chha, tara pani how do you express these feelings. You don't your friend to be disheartened, right...After all you don't want to miss your friend...friends are the most important assets in my life, khai aaruko barema thaha bhayena...
Hajur haru ko sahayog ko aasma...
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| Logical Sense |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 02:59 PM
"You should say 'no' in such a way that it sounds like 'yes'" - famous line from God Father.
This is how Americans say it. You need to read between the lines. But, Nepali way is easy, just say it the way you feel it.
Depending upon situation and subject you can mix and match these two approaches.
Love/not love is delicate issue. No matter how you say it, the other person will get hurt. But, no matter what, you have to do it. It is better said now than later.
So, my suggestion is, have a quite environment, give plenty of time, and say that our friendship should not anything more than friendship or something like that which are pertinent to your situation.
You should not say "I don't love you". That is totally negative. Rather you should say, "I think we are best when we are just friends." Who knows the other person might not love you either, it might just be your thinking that the other person loves you.
Or, if you are not open as "lovers" then just announce that you found a girl of your dream or your parents are talking about your marriage and looks like the proposal is quite interesting.
If you are a person like me who does not want to 'lie' even in my dream then just tell the truth softly.
But, try to keep your friendship in same level after you tell the truth if it is still comfortable with other person.
Good luck, I hope this helps
- iti
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 03:14 PM
Here is one that has worked for me:
" I love and appreciate you as my friend and wellwisher, BUT, I am Not in Love With You!...I hope that based on this honest truth (mine), we can maintain and nurture our friendship for many years to come."
Forget-me-not....Goodluck! :)
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| DWI |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 03:27 PM
Sitara,
And all along I thought we had something going. That's okay, if that's what you wish. ;(
The one that is the easiest is to mention your boyfriend/girlfriend in one of your conversation; even if he/ she doesn't exist. But don't take my advice, am not an expert on the subject.
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 03:27 PM
sitara,
your solution is the worst one for the one who gets the shaft..
coz somehow you end up with this tiny little hope that things may change
and its paralyzing
most idiots dont realize that a gentle no is still a no
some idiots, anyways
well, at least this idiot
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| jules |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 04:09 PM
Dude,
Can you be little more specific on this? I dont get it!!!
Bichara uni, kasto bijog, jaslai man parayo, usai bata rejection
Did you ever tell this Someone you love ***?
If you did, than this Someone deserves a good explanation. Just because you are man does not mean that you can play with someones feelings. Others have feelings too you know&..and what goes around comes around!
;)
GoodLuck!
Jules
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| touch_the_sky |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 04:58 PM
Just say a "NO" and don't hint that you mean yes.
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| oys_chill |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 05:32 PM
forget-me-not, how about this?
"The gesture of rejection which always met me didn't mean that I don't love you, but rather you can't love me as much as you want to. You are unhappily in your love for me, yet your love for me isn't in love with you. Therefore, its not right to say that I have known the words "I love you" but all i know is i should have broken that expectant silence by my saying "I love you" "pheww..too late now!
eheh....hope it helps.....it worked for Kafka :P
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 07:52 PM
Hyaaaaaaaaaaa LeChef du Nuit:
How about this one:
"You just don't have what it takes....Sorry Pal, I don't love you....I don't think I ever will!"
:(
DWI:
We do have something going don't we?.... But what is it..... such unfathomable, untraceable, undelible cyber thingy...can you even begin to define it?
:P
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 07:59 PM
undelible=indelible
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| HahooGuru |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 08:22 PM
If I had a chance to put my denial on "i Love you", my reply could have been:
"I regret that there is someone else whom I really like (=love) so much. However, it should not have any problem to our friendship that will continue to exist intact as before. Thank you for all your gestures in the past and will be looking forward to remain your good friend throughout my life."
Yo reply lekhera dina ko lagi chai perfect chha, tara moukhik rupa bhanda chai ali lamo bhayo kyaaaaaaaaaaaaara.
HG
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 29-Apr-03 10:40 PM
better, but you could omit the first part
the second and third phrases would be enough
the first part would make me think i was 'deficient'
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 04:01 AM
Ok Ok, One more go for Le Chef de Nuit:
"You have everything a woman could ever desire......BUT, I don't desire you, neither will I ever love you in the ways that You desire!"
Ali ali riddle-esque bhayecha..... My hope is that he will emerse himself in decoding the tangle of words and forget his pain momentarily!
:P
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| dangggg |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 06:27 AM
ok! ok!
How aobut this one, eh?
" I love you and enjoy being with you (since (s)he is your friend and you want to continue that relationship) but I am not in love with you"
good luck!!!
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| joie de vivre |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 06:35 AM
this has never failed for me:
get lost, loser :)
le chef, good to see you back.
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| Deep |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 06:49 AM
Kehi ni bhanna pardaina....kina tato na chharo aba ke bhanne ke bhanne bhanera tyam waste garni?
Dekhaidini ni! kholera [----------------afno niyat]
Euta chwak taruni sanga lathariyera hindini...khel khalas. [for an "Allare"]
Euta ghachchi ko thito sanga lathariyera hindini....Khel khalas. [for a "Taruni"]
Ki kaso?
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| yoUnGbLooDZ |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 07:44 AM
tyo question ko answer paunu ko lagi.... hindi movies hernu parcha.. uumm like kuch kuch hota hai.. how shahrukh gets rid of kajol at the begining.. aru kun movies.. uumm hum dil de chuke sanam.. jot done wut aish tell's salman at the end of the movie.. that should help you fo ya..
YB
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| DWI |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 07:52 AM
Sitara, beats me. The question mark is as unknown as the universe and the dot below the question mark, a black hole.
Hey, in one of the Seinfield episode, didn't one girl mentioned about her boyfriend (made up) to get rid of George. I think that trick works the best.
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| oys_chill |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 11:49 AM
deep dai....
idea ta thikai ho hai.tara......pheri jo sanga lathariyera hidyo.....pheri tyo keta/keti ni afu sanga laskina thalyo/thali bhane ni? arko tension suru bhayena?? kati jana sangai maatra latharine tyaspachi :S tensionnnnnnn!
Oys
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| Deep |
Posted
on 30-Apr-03 12:22 PM
Oys-,
latharina paye samma latharina parchha ke ...tension ta afu latharina khojeko (ki) le latharina namanne po ho ki bhanne ma po ta.....jamana kharab chha ...pachhi swarna jayanti [50] le hane si ta latharinchhu nai bhane ni kati nai hat laglan ra?
:)
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 01-May-03 10:46 PM
sitara,
hold it right there......
"you have everything a woman could ever desire"
"i dont desire you"
trasnlation:
"you dont have what i desire"
therefore
either
a) "you dont have everything a woman could desire"
or
b) "i am not a woman"
which one is it?
good to be back, jdv
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| Bhinaju |
Posted
on 02-May-03 01:01 AM
Haina timiharu kasto imaginationma ramayeko?
yo Logical Nonesence bhannelai bahulaha kukurle tokejasto chha.
Aba ktle timlai yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii I love you bhanchhe. Chyauri parya gala dekhera dayalu bhayeko matra hola ni.
tatto na chharo, kasaile bhanihalechha bhane
DINE DANADAN!
DINE DANADAN!
DINE DANADAN!
DINE DANADAN!
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| Bhinaju |
Posted
on 02-May-03 01:03 AM
Haina timiharu kasto imaginationma ramayeko?
yo Logical Nonesence bhannelai bahulaha kukurle tokejasto chha.
Aba ktle timlai yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii I love you bhanchhe. Chyauri parya gala dekhera dayalu bhayeko matra hola ni.
MAILE AJASAMMA JATTI KT HANE NI KASAILE PANI BHANENA KI MALAI HANA, KASAILE PANI UTABATA PAHILA BHANENA KI MA TIMLAI LOVE GARCHHU.
KATHAM KADACHIT kasaile bhanihalechha bhane
DINE DANADAN!
DINE DANADAN!
DINE DANADAN!
DINE DANADAN!
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 02-May-03 04:09 AM
just realized something
RE: my previous post
conclusion (a) clearly contradicts the opening statement "you have everything a woman could desire" and so cannot be the solution and conclusion (b) is also contradictary because it is clear from your post that you are a woman
therefore, your whole 'get lost, loser' statement is completely illogical. but then, i guess females arent exactly logical
i have a sneaky feeling that your gonna say "my riddle did make you think and forget your pain, as i said it would". and you might have been right, but unfortunately i'm good at multitasking..
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 02-May-03 04:09 AM
Le Chef Du Nuit:
Vous etes tré difficile! :(
Yes, you have everything a woman desires. I am a woman. I desire the qualities that you have BUT I don't love you!
or
Vous etes superbe mais .... I don't love you!
whew!
:)
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 02-May-03 04:12 AM
i cant read all that french
look at my name.. its grammatically incorrect
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 02-May-03 04:42 AM
translations:
You are very difficult! :(
You are superb BUT I don't love you!
----------------------------------------
Here, Love has nothing to do Logic unfortunately. If this feeds into the notion of "women are illogical",...so be it... some (not all mind you) men can be happy with that thought and walk away. Also, as the thread originator says, she does not want to lose the guy's friendship.
As for multitasking, gotta go to work. Have a good Friday....and weekend!
* If you have the time, perhaps you would pen down how you would want to be let down....gently (mind you, not every woman has the capacity to say get lost to a friend... and hope to maintain a friendship).
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 02-May-03 04:47 AM
how about 'lets just be sex buddies' :)
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 02-May-03 04:50 AM
i guess my attempt at humor was a little too subtle
of course love has nothing to do with logic
that was the whole point
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 02-May-03 05:02 AM
How about:
"Let's NOT....BUT if you keep waiting for me in my next life.... Maybe, perhaps, whoknows.... you might get lucky!!!!" :P
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 02-May-03 05:11 AM
see, youre making the dude feel like he's got some chance in the REMOTE future.. when he actually dosent
thats kinda cruel
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| Ryan |
Posted
on 02-May-03 05:25 AM
Watch, "How to lose a guys in ten days". You don't have to say anything. Your action will put him away.
--Ryan
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| Poonte |
Posted
on 02-May-03 06:50 AM
Baango-tingo kara ke garai bho? Thaadai bhandine ni:
TA JASTO KUROOP PAAJI SANGA MA LOP GARCHHU? KE MERO STANDARD CHHAINA BHAN THAANYACHHAS? TESKIMA BAJIYA...TALAI LOP GARNA LAI MALAI PAAGAL KUKUR LE TOKYA CHHA? THUIKKA! MARIJAUN BARU TERO JAALI MA FASNA BHANDA TA! MERO KARMA FUTEKO DEKHIS KI KE HO?
Ani pani tyo manchhe le bujhena bhane malai cintact garum, hai? Mai gayera mungro le rankauna parne hunchha tesko tyo baakalo khopadi ma :P
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| Robert Frost |
Posted
on 02-May-03 08:50 AM
Bitter and Sour seems to be the synonyms for Sitara's cruelty...
Poonte, sajha mahila sangh ka sadashya haruko public bhetne bichar cha ki kya ho?? lau hai..! aulan danda bokera...
How about this,
A bit of a lie, but I think she will be fine...!
Note: Verbal and Non-verbal cues are very necessary before you start. Bit of a seriousness in your face. You should face her as if you really do care for her.
"Baby...! (grab her fingers and slowly play with it), I know how much you love me and believe me you are so gorgeous and wonderful girl that I am so lucky to have a friend like you. I had loved you more then anybody else and I still love you but now it is too late as I am already involved with somebody. My ethics doesn't allow me to let go of this girl's hand just like that because I love you. I still admire you and your feelings towards me and will do that forever and ever. If there is God! I will ask him to give me you the next and for serveral next times I am born in this world". I want you to be my friend forever. What is important is that you are able to help someobody and be there when they need you. That is more important then being in love. That is more then love, to show how much you care. And for that I can give you the trust that I will help you whenever you need me. You can count on me for that. (Till this time she must have already cried, Wipe her tears slowly with both hands). I must go now. Please, do remember that we are the best of friends and even if I love another girl, I had always looked upon you as a true friend, a friend I can count on anytime I want. I am so sorry if I hurt you. But lets face the reality and see things from a different perspective.
Shit!! man I am so serious.......!
I really need to go now.....lekhda lekhdai so emotional me.....
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| Najar |
Posted
on 02-May-03 09:03 AM
Robert Frost O' RF that was so damn good? where were you when i needed you? :P
My take on this: just say--dude/dudette, I am too cool/dazzling/smart to be in love with you. This might seem blunt but your counterpart will get the point--straight! Otherwise, as someone mentioned above they might think this person loves me but is not admitting it now because of various reasons (as listed above), and things could change in future.
Another suggestion memorize a song-- Stuck in a moment by U2 and sing it for him/her
heheh haas uthhyo :))
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 02-May-03 10:15 AM
Robert Frost ji.... My Romeo personified:
You seemed to have missed much by your partial readings of my postings.... :(
Anyhow...if you did not read my first posting on this thread...here it is:
" I love and appreciate you as my friend and wellwisher, BUT, I am Not in Love With You!...I hope that based on this honest truth (mine), we can maintain and nurture our friendship for many years to come."
And I was berated for not tough enough!
Hai hai!
Damned if you do, damned if you don't! :(
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 02-May-03 10:27 AM
Le Chef Du Nuit:
This time my humour was too subtle!
Anyhow, if I have told the dude in so many words "NO!" and yet he insists on waiting this life time and another.... well, he does have a right to how he spends his time.... waiting or moving on hoina?
On a sidenote: Usually the word "No!" does translate into cruelty by the wounded party.
Frost ji:
I can't be that wordy while saying "No" neither in action, nor in words. You definitely seem to have the knack for melodrama there! :) A good trait to have perhaps, but, I'd feel sorry for the girl and the fingers he is Playing with!
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| Logical Sense |
Posted
on 02-May-03 11:01 AM
#1 way to say NO,
RF way!!!
Best ever!!!!
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| prashant |
Posted
on 02-May-03 11:50 AM
Be happy dude, you are in position to give the verdict. It's the easier part you have to play. The tough part is to tolerate others saying no to you or get confused by what the significant other to you meant to say.
The best way to say no is what i call "Royal Rejection", or "Royal Ditch" if you are done with playing games.
Tell him/her that you don't deserved to be loved by him/her. S/he deserves much better and that you not gonna ruin his/her life by accepting the proposal. This is your duty as best friend and that you would even sacrifice your feelings for that. Tell him/her all the bad things about you, curse yourself and even reveal your black secrets that will turn him/her off if needed. Tell all your crushes, affairs, relations and explain how bad you two would look as a couple.
You will obviously gonna help him/her to find the right and much better partner........which is absolutely wrong otherwise she wouldn't have come up with a proposal to a crap who brings an issue here that seems like bragging......yo last part chahi joke ho hai !!.......
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| rook |
Posted
on 02-May-03 01:57 PM
If the best way to say "I Love You" is to look into his/her eyes, sigh, and say I love you.
Then best way to say I Dont Love you is to not look at him/her, spit on the ground, and say I don't love you.
Best way to break up, don't phone, make dates and break them, call and ask what's wrong, make another date, show up late, forget a gift, promise you will be good,until he/she can't stand it anymore, then tell him/her, "OK if thats what you want, but you are going to miss me."
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| le chef du nuit |
Posted
on 02-May-03 02:05 PM
the battle to subtelty is paved with the protests of the direct
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| lonely |
Posted
on 02-May-03 02:12 PM
Good Ideas..I wish I knew them before so that I coud have used....
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 02-May-03 02:46 PM
The Road to hell is paved with good intentions...the road to heartbreak is paved with unrequitted love!
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| lonely |
Posted
on 03-May-03 09:06 PM
Sitara jiu
That was great..
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| lonely |
Posted
on 19-May-03 12:28 PM
so many ideas, love garera use garna paryo ki kya ho????
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