| SelfExplorer |
Posted
on 10-May-03 04:10 PM
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
>
>*I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was Water in the
>carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied, "In the lake."
>
>*The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
>
>*When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him
>keep her.
>
>*I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.
>
>*Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You
>order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, You wish
>you had ordered that.
>
>*Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
>
>*Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until
>got married; then it was too late.
>
>*A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." The next day he
>received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine."
>
>*A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire." "And
>what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. "A billionaire.", she
>replied.
>
> *A man, upon his engagement, went to his father and said," Dad! I've found
>a woman just like mother. His father replied, So what do you want?
>"Sympathy?"
>
>*Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
>
>*Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage
>is the triumph of hope over experience.
>
>*If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word
>you say, talk in your sleep.
>
>* I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
>
>*It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems
>longer.
>
>*A man was complaining to a friend: "I had it all -money, a beautiful house,
>a big car, the love of a beautiful woman - and then, BAM!, it was all gone!"
>"What happened?" asked his friend. "My wife found out..."
>
>*Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking
>they had no faults at all.
>
>*The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it
>once.
>
>*Words to live by: Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your parachute.
>
>*First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second guy: "You're lucky,
>mine's still alive."
> > -------
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