| Sajha.com Archives | |
| Username | Post |
| Nepe | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 11:08 AM
Please read next posting.. . 
|
| Nepe | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 11:09 AM
What you see above is an example of a typical structure of a ghazal. Very briefly, as you can see the above ghazal has five poems (sher). There is no rule on the maximum number of shers in a ghazal. However, less than four would not look good. The first sher in a ghazal is called 'maqta'. 'Maqta' is important because it defines the rhyming pattern for the rest of the shers. The rhyming structure has two parts- 'radif' (repeated words) and 'kaafiyaa' (rhyme). In above ghazal, the rhyming words, 'salkeka', chhalkeka', ' palkeka', 'dhalkeka' etc are kaafiyaa, and the constant words 'Aankhaa baata' that followed kaafiya is radif. Radif is not a must in ghazal, but kaafiyaa is. The last sher of a ghazal is called 'matlaa'. Usually, poet includes his name in it. But it is also not a must. Another important part is 'baher', that is the length of each line. It is important to have the same baher in all the shers. It is also important to note that each sher is independent. Shers in a ghazal are connected by rhyme, but not necessarily by theme. Each sher should tell a complete message. And that is the most difficult part of writing a ghazal. It's like 'gaagar mein saagar bharnaa'. You have very limited words to tell a complete story. I hope this brief introduction helps you to understand the structure of ghazal. You can always google to find more information. Now, you might ask, why I included Sitara's picture with the ghazal above. Well, it is to indirectly tell that you need to have something to tell in order to write a ghazal. You can not write a ghazal if you just have to tell something. So, my dear friends, it's about the inspiration..inspiration. And finally, a word of apology to Sitara. Sitara, please forgive me for my dhrishtataa to use your picture without your prior consent. My ghazal looked so incomplete without your picture. I could not resist it. |
| acharya | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 11:12 AM
>>it's about the inspiration..inspiration. :) |
| shirish | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 12:39 PM
Nice Nepe nice! Definitely not a FAZAL in the name of GAZHAL. |
| shirish | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 12:48 PM
i liked your word combinations. Aghi samjida samjhidai message post gari halen... |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 01:12 PM
>>it's about the inspiration..inspiration. :-), Nice! |
| vivid | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 01:32 PM
Nepe ji, Bhelbadi le bandh nai tute jasto cha ni gazal ko?, :) Urlando khahare jhai nabagnus, Ekchin mai urle ra sukna, Bans jastai pani nabadnus, Akash nachoyee jhukna, Trishna metna pyasiko, Tirtire dharo banos, Hajur ka gazal haru, Karnapriya sadhai bajos! Suvakamana sahit! |
| Mitra 2 | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 01:42 PM
Nepe, Tyati sano photo ma katro thulo story lekhna sakya! Inkar nagarnus, yo chai bhitrai (center/mutu) batai niskeko ho ke. Aanshu piuna sikne nasikne ta chhandai.chha, tara siki.sakeko ghajal lekna chai nachhodnus hai? Tapai ko ghajal ko kunai jawaf chhaina. |
| Rashmi | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 03:12 PM
Kya ho nepe dai sitara didi ko photo lai backdrop banaii achel nikkai gajal pesh garna thalnu bho. kataiii dastaney ishq ta haina? kuch kuch hota hai jasto cha ni daju lai..ahmmm ahmmm ;) |
| ruck | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 03:44 PM
Lovely work ... You are good at feeling and writing .. Keep writing.. |
| SITARA | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 03:44 PM
Eh hajur, apology kina ni... when you have romanticized my very ordinary picture and ordained it with poetic, lyrical and melodious gazal! Inspiration! Inspiration!.... And how true your words!.... I am truly inspired! :) |
| Nepe | Posted
on 04-Jun-03 04:27 PM
Thank you Sitara. Truly indebted. You saved me from an imminent prosecution. Mitra Mitra2 and Rashmi baini, What can I say ? Well, the poet inside me is guilty as charged. I have nothing to say in his defense. As far as duniyadari ko Nepe is concerned, well, he was only trying to give a small tutorial on Ghazal. Haina ra bhanya ? Shirish, G_I, Vivid, Ruck, Thank you for your shubhakamana and encouragement. They will certainly keep me going, friends. |
| prempujari | Posted
on 05-Jun-03 07:09 AM
Nepe Hazurr!!! Ooo Nepal ma huda, "Gazal Restaurant" ma gazal sunna gainthyo -- Anand Karki le harpinn machchyaudai gaauthyo gazal -- tyo ni farmaaishi gazal... euta kaagaz ma gazal lekhera ra dine, ani Karki jyu le machchiyera gaai dine -- "dekha hain paheli baar saajan ki aankhon main pyaar" bhanera. Kyaa Talented. Ajha euta dai le ta "Gazal" word ko meaning nai arkai banaidiyathiyo. According to him, Gazal restaurant bata tanna jaad dhokera, bahira aayera "gazal" gaaune- re!! I never wanted to know the defination of Gazal, and I never cared. But, Since hamro Harippp Nepe jyu wrote about it, I was compelled to read the thread. Wow!! I've been educated, and wow!! that gazal on the top was gooood, and wow!! That lady in the backgrounds looks familiar!! (Jaach liii dinchu nabhani-bakshiyos ni... Gazal ko defination ko, natra feri note lekhera raakhnu paryo.. hehe). Seriously, for a long time, I used to think Gazal was more like genre of music, rather than writing. Question hazurr!!! Does Gazal have to be lyrical? Like you know, where the words on every line are counted, every verse are identical.. the most important for the lyric(as far as I know): Even if the line in the song is one of the best lines ever written, it could be lyrically incorrect if it doesn't sound good (if it sounds flat or too many words, which make it difficult for a singer to sing, are used) something like that. Yesso, enlighten me hazurr!!! euta jaawosh hai gazal (is it??), or is more like sufi-lyrics!! Yeh jo halka halka suroor hain Yeh Teri nazar ka koosoor hain Mujhe sharab pina sikhaa diyaa Teri pyaar ne teri chaah ne Teri baheki baheki nigaah ne Mujhe sharaabi banaa diyaaa (Mere baad kishko sataawoge) -pujari!! |
| Nepe | Posted
on 05-Jun-03 08:18 AM
PremPujari, A treasure of humor, my most favorite movie critc of Sajha, thank you for stopping by and sharing your jigyasha. You are right about lyrical nature of ghazal. A constant 'baher' (metering) should be used when one writes ghazal. The socalled Nepali ghazals sung by Gulam Ali, Muralidhar, Anand Karki etc do not have ghazal characters except for the 'baher'. It is only the 'baher' and the particular style of singing that made people assume those songs are ghazals. I am told lately some real ghazals have entered in Nepali music. There are some good names in literary front of Nepali Ghazal too. You might have heard Gyanubakar Poudel's name, for example. Have you ever imagined about English ghazal ? Well, there are. There is a web magazine dedicated exclusively for ghazals in English. Google. You might notice that most of them are socalled freestyle ghazal. No adherence to the classical rules of the ghazal. So ghazal seems to be evolving. I have said in a different thread that I believe that a poetry/song is a ghazal when people think that it is a ghazal. So I don't mind to call Anand Karki haru ko gaayan ghazals. The poem you recited is beautiful. And No, it is not a ghazal. It is, if I am correct, 'rubayi', a separate genre in Urdu poetry. I hope it helps. |
| Poonte | Posted
on 05-Jun-03 08:25 AM
Ahem! Ma ni chhodam euta Gazhal? .....ahile lai bhaigo! |
| Ahura Mazda | Posted
on 05-Jun-03 10:32 AM
Nepe, Is this gazal yet? Chutukka sajai malai tero sabda ko saree ma Sutauna khochhas phakaiphulyai unyu ko ghari ma Tasbir heri bujhayes chitta, tyo bhanda nabadhes bagai diula hiud ko yammai akha ko badhi ma |
| Nepe | Posted
on 05-Jun-03 12:07 PM
Ahura Mazda ji, New in sajha ? Welcome, hajur. And that was a good start. You will need at least two more shers to add to make it a ghazal. Your maqta defines your kaafiya as '-rima' and 'maa' as radif. The second sher did not follow the kaafiya perfectly. However, having myself taken such liberal approach in some of my ghazals, I will give it a go. Keep it up. |
| Nepe | Posted
on 14-Jun-03 12:23 PM
Forgot the source where I got it from, but here is a good example of ghazal. Enjoy . 
|
| Harris | Posted
on 14-Jun-03 01:14 PM
Nepeji, title pani raichha ni ta ghazal ma... ani last ma ghazalkar ko nam pani chhaina raichha... are these all flexibilities of ghazals? |
| Nepe | Posted
on 14-Jun-03 03:31 PM
Yes, Harris ji. The convention of including poet's alias in the final sher is not compulsory. However, traditionally, ghazal does not have a title like other genre of poetry. The reason is this- Ghazal is usually polythematic. Each sher in a ghazal is a complete and independent poem in terms of themes. They are connected by monorhyme only. So a ghazal is a collection of multiple poems. Therefore it can not have an unifying title. However, nowadays, you can not have something without a name. So people give some title to identify it, like we give titles to songs, usually with first few words or the last few words of the first stanza. However, it is clear that such title does not necessarily represent or summarize the meaning of the whole song. There is one interesting departure from the traditional ghazal writing increasingly seen these days. That is people have started to write monothematic ghazal, that is all shers of a given ghazal revolving around the same subject. In such case, a distinct title logically arises and I think we should accept this. As I said elsewhere, life should dictate the rules. Rules should not dictate life. |
| Prem Charo | Posted
on 14-Jun-03 11:23 PM
Napeji, Hindi maa lekhna hune ho ki hoina kunni? malaai ta je aauthyo tyahi lekhi diye, Lau jja ta vanera. Gajal me bandishe alfaj hi nahi kaafi Jigar kaa khun vi kuch chaahiye asar ke liye Tumhaare sahar kaa mausam badaa suhaana lage Me ek saam churaa laaun agar aapko bura naa lage Gajal gaaune charo : Prem Charo :) |
| prempujari | Posted
on 15-Jun-03 07:31 AM
(Nepe bro, sorry for messing around in your thread!) Prem Charo bro, With all due respect, don't you think your above posting contradicts your previous infamous 'quotes' on 'bihari' songs/litrature and craps? I am not writing this because I have something against you despite the fact that you gave names to some people in Sajha, including me. I don't keep grudges against someone. That ain't me. It is just that someone is inconsistent with the statement they made just few weeks ago, makes me go puke. (you know, like Nepali politicians -- they freakin' change side and statement more than their princliple.) (some of the quotes by PC jyu in his previous postings) http://www.gbnc.org/sajha/html/openthread.cfm?forum=2&ThreadID=9753&show=all#1588 Posted on 04-08-03 11:45 PM Reply YoungBloodz, Simple Girl, Prem Pujari,Gurl Interrupted, Khimu, and all Biharis, Aaja ra voli kina ho timiharu Bihaari geet gaauchau ? India ko vasha prachar garera timiharu Bihaari chamcha hunchau ? timiharu indian dalaal, nepali ke lekhchau? Nepal kaa kapoot timiharu, indian bhasha kina vukchau ? Hindi maa lekhera kaslai impress garna khojya? Nepali aaudaina? America maa aayera pani .. bihari bani gayeko chaina??? Lau Lau Dhoti ko jayakaar gaaunu Timiharuko rastra vasha ko sajha maa aayera prachar gareko? Rastriya charo = Prem Charo ************************************ Posted on 04-09-03 10:16 PM Reply Prem Pujari and other bihari KA CHAMCHA HARU "KHABAR DAR RADDI TOKARI AND KHALI SISI PURANA KAGAJ" Des ko sima le des lai matra hoina janta ko bhawana lai batdachha. Dui rupiya ko kagaz ko chirkuto le koi nagrik ra des bhakta hune bhaye nepal paseka ti sabai pachas lakh "dhoti" nepal bhakta ra vastbik nepali hune thiye. ... BIAHRI BHASA MA BHUKNE LE APHNO DES KO LAGI KE GARCHHA HINDI GEET RAGAT MA DAUDINE LE RADDI TOKARI WALA KO CHAMACHA GIRI GARCHHA NEPALI KUKUR BIHARI BHUKAI???? mechi dekhi mahakali ko dhuk dhuki bokdai udne charo=== prem charo :) ************************************ Posted on 04-11-03 10:26 PM Reply PremPujari and all Biharis, Khimu lai kina gaali garne? aafu le rastrya bhasha ko marma ra dharma nabujhne. Bihari bhakha maa geet gaaudai aafnai bihari sathi lai gaali garne? Timiharu ta eutai dang ko mulaa ho ni. Maile rastrya vasha ko kura garda malai laaaamo coment lekera khubai thulo kaam gare vannu ko satta, aafai realize gare kaso hola? Bihari ko jaat ta dekhaayou ni last maa. Aafnai sathi lai gaali garne. Udaar huna siknu paryo. Nepali Charo = Prem charo ************************************* Posted on 04-08-03 11:53 PM Reply laya_from_himalaya, Lekhne kuraa kehi aayena? why in hindi ? Are you indian chamcha ? Rastra ra rastriyata vanne pani sochnu paryo ni. Nepali kukku ko Bihaari vukaai ?? Damn.!!!!!! ************************************ Posted on 04-09-03 10:59 PM Playa From Himalaya, what do you mean "Way to go" ?? Dhoti ko kabita copy pest garera aafno asali rastriyata dekhaauna khojeko ?? hey Bihari, kina khelchau hindi maa juhaari ? Chasma, Timiharu jasto Bihari Dalal hunu vanda ta ma Nepali kukur ko upanaam le nai garba garchu. Chasma, timijasto Nepal aama ko chati maa chura ghopera bihaari ko gungaan gaaune ma hoina. Bihari chasmaa dwaara nepal prati ko rastriyata lai herna sakindaina. Nepali man ko kuro bujcha prem charo :) ************************************* I know you will say that is URDU not HINDI.. eh!!! |
| Prem Charo | Posted
on 15-Jun-03 08:03 AM
Prem Pujari bro, Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha !!!!!! Ooho kasto dukha gareko? I was looking for you for a while. I even opened a new thread in your name. I wrote above saayari, just to give you something to write about me and You did. I have one question for you. Can I email you? I still hate "Dhoti saamrajyabaad" in culture, tredition,language and all. PP le gareko dukha dekhera mari mari haasne charo = Prem Charo. :) |
| Prem Charo | Posted
on 15-Jun-03 08:06 AM
PP bro, Here is the thread I opened, looking for you : http://www.sajha.com/sajha/html/OpenThread.cfm?forum=2&ThreadID=11090 Prem Charo :P |
| Harris | Posted
on 15-Jun-03 09:11 AM
Nakacharo = Prem charo |
| Prem Charo | Posted
on 15-Jun-03 11:57 AM
Harris, Kina tyastari risaayeko? Maile "I still hate "Dhoti saamrajyabaad" in culture, tredition,language and all" vanera ki kyaa ho? Ajhai katti dhoti ko pachaadi ????Damn !! Nepali Charo = Prem Charo :) |
| Laughing Buddha | Posted
on 21-Jul-03 06:55 AM
Nepe ji: After reading some of your Nepali gazals, I have come to appreciate the beauty and poetry in gazals. Thank you, for bringing this form of literature to our notice. |
| Nepe | Posted
on 22-Jul-03 03:38 PM
Laughing Buddha ji, I am responding to your request like in the other thread. Here is a ghazal. I had presented the matla of this ghazal to Najar as her birthday gift. So, I dedicate the whole ghazal to her again. Except for an imperfect rhyme in the matla (introductory couplet) and imprecise metering in some lines, this is an example of a ghazal. Note that this ghazal has four ashara (plural of sher, called couplets in English), monorhyme (aThoT, dunoT, choT, boT) and a constant refrain followed by the rhyming word (...haru..haru..haru) and poet's alias in the maqta (concluding couplet). na haansdo ho aankhaa tee, na chaldo ho onTh haru na TuTdo ho mera yee hajaaraun aThoT haru dooi gunaa gunaaso chha, chaar gunaa chha maayaa tee timra aankhaama chhan gajab ka dunoT haru kahile maile aiyaa aattha bhanne hola ? Ahile samma ganeko ganyai chhu choT haru paitaalaa ma kaanDhaa chhan, phoolai-phool chha shir maa 'Nepe', kahaan khojchhas gulafa ka boTharu ? g x+f:bf] xf] cf+vf tL, g rNbf] xf] cf]+7x¿ g 6'6\bf] xf] d]/f oL xhf/f}+ c7f]6x¿ b"[O{ u'gf u'gf;f] 5, rf/ u'gf 5 dfof tL ltd|f cf+vfdf 5g\ uhasf b"gf]6x¿ slxn] d}n] P]of cfTyf eGg] xf]nf < clxn] ;Dd ug]sf] uGo} 5' rf]6x¿ k}tfnfdf sf+9f 5g\, Ú"n}Ú"n 5 lz/df &g]k]Ú, sxf+ vf]H5;\ u'nfÚsf af]6x¿ < |
| Nepe | Posted
on 22-Jul-03 03:40 PM
g x+f:bf] xf] cf+vf tL, g rNbf] xf] cf]+7x¿ g 6'6\bf] xf] d]/f oL xhf/f}+ c7f]6x¿ b"[O{ u'gf u'gf;f] 5, rf/ u'gf 5 dfof tL ltd|f cf+vfdf 5g\ uhasf b"gf]6x¿ slxn] d}n] P]of cfTyf eGg] xf]nf < clxn] ;Dd ug]sf] uGo} 5' rf]6x¿ k}tfnfdf sf+9f 5g\, Ú"n}Ú"n 5 lz/df &g]k]Ú, sxf+ vf]H5;\ u'nfÚsf af]6x¿ < |
| Himalayas | Posted
on 23-Jul-03 02:51 AM
maile ta kahile lekheko chhuina...tar pani...Nepe jyu ko nakkal gardai... harsit thieu, ramaeka thieu, hridaya hridaya jodepachhi faldaithyo ani fuldaithyo, mayako bagaicha sadaiwa godepachhi chira paryo chhati, "gariblai dinna mero chhori" bhaner pajero bhitraibaat unko buwale mukh forepachhi bhanin "aba hami aafno aafno bato lagau jhare srawane bhel, khaeka bacha todepachhi anyolma pare, samundra bichma haraeko jahaaj jhai gareko yatrabaat achanak unile arkai bato modepachhi ghari haschhu ani runchhu, mastisak asaltulan bhaepachhi sansaar achanak adhyaro bhayo, priyasile aaja chhodepachhi Nepe jyu, yasto hunchha? |
| najar | Posted
on 23-Jul-03 06:32 AM
Nepe ji, Jhandai miss bhae chha yo thread, yeso hereko ta mero naam nai dekhe! Truly honored I am to see such beautiful ghazal dedicated to me, an extended version of my memorable birthday gift, i should say :) Besides your immense talent of creating exquisite ghazals, you have an ability to make the posters feel very special, not to mention the respectful dialogues you engage in with them, thus giving readers a pleasure to read your work, postings! And this thread is no exception. Do hope to read more of your ghazals :) One of my favorite posters you remain! najar |
| Nepe | Posted
on 23-Jul-03 11:45 AM
Najar, Honor is all mine. And thank you for your credit for 'respectful dialogues' I try to engage in with posters. This is going to come handy to convince some posters who are not convinced of my politeness. Hehe ! Himalayas ji, I am very much impressed. You should keep the length of each line constant. Rule of baher. Ghazal is written in matrik chhanda. Other than that, very impressive work. In your honor, I am typing it in Devnagari. My typing is painfully slow. Otherwise I would type for Paschim too. He has got a wonderful lok kabita in another thread. So Himalayas, this is in your honor.. xlif{t lyof}+, /dfPsf lyof}+, x[bo x[bo hf]8]kl5 ÚNb}Yof] clg Ú'Nb}Yof] dfofsf] au}rf ;b}j uf]8]kl5 lr/f k¥of] 5ftL, æu/LjnfO{ lbGg 5f]/LÆ eg]/ kh]/f] leq}af6 pgsf] a'jfn] d'v Úf]/]kl5 elgg\ æca xfdL cfºgf] cfºgf] af6f] nfuf}Æ ´/] >fjg] e]n, vfPsf afrf tf]8]kl5 cGof}ndf k/]+, ;d'Gb| lardf x/fPsf] hxfh ´} u/]sf] ofqfaf6 crfgs pgLn] af6f] df]8]kl5 3/L xf+:5' clg ¿G5', dl:tis c;Gt'ng eP kl5 ;+;f/ crfgs c+Wof/f] eof], k|]o;Ln] cfh 5f]8]kl5 |
| KaLaNkIsThAn | Posted
on 23-Jul-03 11:05 PM
Waah Waah!! Kyaaa Maara!! Nepe Hazur ko Jawaaf chaaina! ;) |
| Himalayas | Posted
on 24-Jul-03 08:28 AM
Thank you Nepe jyu for your encouragement. mathi tapaile lekhnu bhako padrer yaso try gareko. Thanks for your guidance... partek line ma sadba barabar hunuparchha bhaneko jasto lagyo..tesai le jaso taso partek line maa saat-saat wata sadbaharu rakheko ho. Tyo "matrik chhanda" bhaneko chahi bujhina, tes baremaa kehi bataunu hunchha hola bhanne aasha gardachhu. second try hai ta hajur... udasintale chhauchha sadaiwa samjhada bigat jharna lageka aanshu ma rokdaichhu ujadriyo mero susojit sapanako sansaar sade saatko dasha ma bhogdaichhu bhae sabai mera kalpanaharu kalpitmatra sara pida hajursanga ma pokhdaichhu lagyo dherai samaya bujhna malaai mudkile aafnai taukoma ma thokdaichhu du:kh jati mero, sukh unko ahile manko tarajuma ma jokhdaichhu chira parchha chhati, rasauchha nayan jharna lageka aanshu ma rokdaichhu |
| Nepe | Posted
on 24-Jul-03 11:31 AM
Himalayas, A quick reply from my office. Chhanda are of two types Maatrik chhanda and Baarnik chhanda In the former, you pay attention to keep the equal number of sounds (which is roughly the total number of the letters or the syllables, but not the words, in each line). In the later, you should follow the pattern of the long sound (deergha) and the short sound (hraswa) too. Check the poem 'Kiran' on the homepage of Sajha for an example of a Baarnik chhanda. It is written in sragdhara chhanda. Classical Urdu ghazal are also written in some Baarnik chhanda. But the modern trend is to use Maatrik chhanda because it is way too easier than the Baarnik chhanda. Your first line has 16 or 18 maatraa u-da-sin-ta-le-chha-u-chha-sa-dai-wa-sam-jha-da-bi-gat or u-da-si-n(a)-ta-le-chha-u-chha-sa-dai-wa-sam-jha-da-bi-ga-t(a) You should keep that as a rule for the rest of the shers. There are certain maatraa which are more common than others because they fit to some popular musical notes (tri-taal, jhap-taal, etc). However, I am not expert myself to tell you more. Just listen to some classical urdu ghazals, you will get them. In your latest ghazal, the introductory couplet (with both lines rhyming) is missing and one rhyme (bhogdaichha) is imperfect. But as I have explained elsewhere, I myself have used imperfect rhyme plenty. Nepali language is not as rich as Urdu in rhyming words. So this should be tolerable, if we want to encourage people to write Nepali ghazal, in my view. I noticed one important thing in your ghazal. You have a very good sense of writing individual sher. You have wonderfully done bhoomika baandhne kaam in the first line and surprise dine kaam in the second line. That is a good way of producing a magical effect in the sher. Another thing. You are free to write about different story/theme/topics in different shers. You don't have to limit yourself to a single theme. But if you do, that's good too. Once again, I am not an expert. So expect errors in what I have said. You can google for good resources of ghazal writing. This one may be useful. - http://www.ebazm.com/ghazalbeher.htm Good going, Himalays ji ! |
| Himalayas | Posted
on 25-Jul-03 02:53 AM
Nepe jyu, once again thank you very much for your explanation, and the link... You have given some hints about gazal so felt like trying with the help of yours. Bit hard for me to understand as I am really new but I will print everything and go through all the tips again and again, and try to understand. "I noticed one important thing in your ghazal. You have a very good sense of writing individual sher. You have wonderfully done bhoomika baandhne kaam in the first line and surprise dine kaam in the second line. That is a good way of producing a magical effect in the sher." Thank you for analysing and your encouragement. Nepe jyu, yo chahi Manu Brajaki jyu ko gazal baat... Prajaatantra shishu nai chha shishulaai syaahaar chaahiyo yaslaai bhane kaakh ani boknelaai CAR chaahiyo Matrik chhanda bhaneko yasto ho? |
| vivid | Posted
on 25-Jul-03 03:06 AM
Himalayas, A good going! under the promotership of Nepe ji, :) Waiting for more from both of you! |
| Himalayas | Posted
on 25-Jul-03 09:43 AM
Vivid bro/sis, Nepe jyu ko gazal haru padrer ani uhale dinu bhako guide line haru herer....yaso lekhna sikdai gareko ni.. yo chhanda haru ta pahila School ma ali ali suneko ho ...tar .. kahile ramrari nabujheko.. je hosh ahile bujhne koshis gardai chhu... ek palta yaso najar garidinu bhako ma hajur lai dhanyabad. |
| Nepe | Posted
on 25-Jul-03 10:40 AM
Vivid ji, Thank you. You have been a valuable loyal reader of my poetry. Remember, readers like you are my only reward that motivates me to write more. ******** Himalayas ji, You cited a nice sher of Manu Brajaki. You may be surprised to hear that I myself do not know much about the works on Nepali ghazal by big names like Manu, Gyanuwakar etc. Neither I had any formal training in ghazal lekhan. That's why I am repeating I do not know much. I am a learner myself. Anyway, the Maatik chhanda, in my understanding, means having equal number of letters (or syllables to be precise) in each line and you are free to use hraswa or deergha letters wherever you want. So it is a chhanda-less chhanda. What you learnt in school belong to baarnik chhanda. There are hundreds of baarnik chhand. But let's not go there. In Manu's sher, depending upon how you count, you can see they have equal or almost eqaul number of syllables in each line. That's how it is in a maatrik chhanda. Pra-jaa-tan-tra-shi-shu-nai-chha-shi-shu-laai-syaa-haar-chaa-hi-yo [16] Yas-laai-bha-ne-kaa-kh-a-ni-bok-ne-laai-CAR-chaa-hi-yo [15] or Pra-jaa-tan-tra-shi-shu-nai-chha-shi-shu-laa-i-syaa-haar-chaa-hi-yo [17] Ya-s(a)-laa-i-bha-ne-kaa-kh-a-ni-bok-ne-laa-i-CAR-chaa-hi-yo [18] Nepe |