| Sajha.com Archives | |
| Username | Post |
| bhunte | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 04:22 AM
I am posting it with a request of one of my online fren who currently dont have a sajha nick, but she has a very pleasant personality and talents working in a global position and travelling a lot around the globe. I take pride of her presence is Sajha. So the question is not my original idea. Mahila sathi ho, please dont attack me for bringing up that issue here. We debated much and thats a genuine concern as well which may also apply to male friend. I appreciate your opinions. No personal attack please. |
| kalekrishna | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 05:03 AM
Bhunte ( I prefer to abstain using ji or ZEE as somebody formerly questioned my intention of adding the tag to his/her identity in Sajha). Interesting topic that dragged me to add a piece to the chain: What makes you think so? Do you have statistically evaluated data published in any peer reviewed journal on this topic. If it is not true, well sigh.. if it is true; then what is the main reason, who are those smart ones. What are their salient features? In case the second condition applies; then in my assumption it is because they are smart they fail to get a compatible partners. The advertisement should read: R you smart enough to get me |
| ruck | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 07:14 AM
WHY SMART NEPALI WOMEN CAN'T FIND COMPATIBLE PARTNERS? -------------> SAYS WHO???????????????? |
| VincentBodega | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 07:59 AM
Theres a saying that goes something like if you dont have anything meaningful to say then dont say anything. This is a good example of that. Lets break this down, the topic is WHY SMART NEPALI WOMEN CAN'T FIND COMPATIBLE PARTNERS? The question talks about compatible partners for smart nepali women. This means that there IS an existence of smart nepali men. (Descartes- "I think therefore I am") Then theres another thing. Smart nepali women havent been finding them. So they are "being found" by not so smart nepali women or by women in general who are not nepali. (simple rule of exclusion) Therefore, what kind of smartness is that if you cant compete with other women OR at least with those non so smart nepali women. May be the measure of smartness should be the inverse of what it is today. May be that would give us a sensible picture. :) Enjoy!!! -- BV PS Do I smell a nobel prize here? |
| SimpleGal | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 08:27 AM
Hahahahha....Keep going guys! Interesting topic! VB, hats off to your logic! ;) |
| bored2death | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 10:37 AM
Bhunts, thanks for taking the time and trouble to post the summary of the long electronic discourse we had earlier. It is kind of strange that this topic came up towards the very end of the discourse and it was more to see if this discourse could be kept alive, of course between the two of us, at a later time/date rather than to see what the responses would be on a public forum. I am more convinced now (than during the time we were online) that you have made the first attempt to take the time and pain (ooouch) to post it on a public forum such as this one that this discourse should continue on a p2p chat as well. Dont let those bikini wearing gals at the nearby beech distract you and damn may the force be with you!!!! bored2death |
| Poonte | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 10:58 AM
Maybe those smart Nepali women look for smarter Nepali men--but then again, because they think they are the smartest, they can't find anyone smarter. Now, all you have to do is think less smarter, so that your smartest ego is in the closet, and look for smarter guy. Then if you still cant find smarter men, I have no smartest clue to what's wrong with smart Nepali women. Now, was that a smart comment? Any other smart people with smarter ideas? Without trying to act smartest? OK, let me be smart and end this smart comment here. I think it's the smartest thing to do before smarter peopole jump on this liitle less smart guy! eheheh... :P |
| bored2death | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 11:12 AM
poonts, good one. |
| bhenda2 | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 01:57 PM
In my opinion Nepalese men dont want to associate with smarter women because they are scared of being dominated. |
| thugged out | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 02:16 PM
Uh, no, no and no. As a man, I can't accept that there's a woman out there who's smarter than me. Perhaps more diligent, but smarter? I beg to differ. You don't see that many nobel prize winners that are women. Most professors are men. All American Presidents are men. All Nepali Kings are men(umm, king by definition is a male, so wtf am I saying here? gone cuckoo for cocoa puffs eh.) However, I do concede one thing. Women make good housewives. Intellectually weaker, but culturally stronger, i.e. women are usually the ones that preserve culture. My momma is one heck of a religious bhagvat gita thumping apsara, my dadda is an evangelical atheist. So analyze that you assholes. |
| lonely | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 02:42 PM
One of the reason that smart nepali women don't can't find compatible partners, is that they don't look at the right place. How can you find such persons, anywhere you go. They are not like the rest fo the world to find/meet them, and maybe most smart men don't want smart wives for them as someone already said above, they think too much of themselves, and not everyone can take it as easily ( do I sound too negative??) BTW, maybe the so called smart women are not so smart as they think of themselves....or they too smart, that no one really wants tham as their partners. I bet I don't want a very smart wife for my self. always lonely, |
| john doe | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 03:11 PM
Thugged out, Analysis done. Result: Your momma, by default, is dumber than your dadda, but she is more religious and culturally inclined. Hypothesis: You must've inherited your intelligence entirely from your momma. |
| VincentBodega | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 04:33 PM
AMEN to that hypothesis, brother Doe. -- BV |
| gator_guy | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 04:57 PM
well, i think most of the time, a smart nep women will have hard time finding a compatible partners. And i personally don think men are responsible for it (at least in my way of life and thinking). i like to be with a smart women. I think there are quite some smart considered nep women around also. Smart nep men are looking for smart women, but along with the smartness of the women, they don want the arrogance to come alongwith. So, if the smart men would look for only smartness (which we often call) in women, then compatibility if definite. But the smart men is looking for something more than smart, guess that is decency, which might not necessarily in (what we consider) the "smart women". recalling to my experience with very very very very very few smart considered girls, i felt like smartness and ghamandi pani comes side-by-side (wish that were false). guess most of nep men don like this, which is logical too (so simply give then a damn) . i like smart women, but cant bear ghamandi ones (thats why i am still single). I do have space for what i call DESERVING arrogant, but have never found anyone like that. I am personally of the opinion that women has to be smart, so that they go for work and come to the main stream of development as well, but at the highest level, i like to see them modest. as for the men's side, i think just being smart/educated/good job holder, does not imply that men must avoid from household activities (hope folks don call me JOI TINGRE) |
| Yadav | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 06:46 PM
coz they keep overlooking me. Why else? |
| thugged out | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 07:14 PM
John Doe is of course a little tot who has to attack my momma. You know what lil kids say when they're losing an argument or are real ticked off? They say, "Your Mom". Case in point, John Doe who has dough for a brain. Keep singing in the tune of Do a deer a female deer, for you're no more smarter than a fuking animal. So fuk off, or I'll have to mine your dough-brain till you come to your fuking senses. Bitch. Don't be makin' me pull out mah gat fo Imma ice you like a thug bizatch. But too bad it's a water pistol. |
| bhunte | Posted
on 22-Sep-03 07:24 PM
Kalekrishna, I believe they must be in Sociology or Psychology journals. Thanks for the alternate title but the current one is simple n direct without any hidden agenda. b2d: Sorry i took some precaution for taking the trecharious adventure by posting that in this forum. You never know sometime some post takes a U turn and one may engulf in flame alive. I can sigh deep that you are now convinced. Yes, we will continue to have the discourse and on varied other contemporary issues as well in our future e-discussion series. eheheeh...Hajur lai tyo bikiniwala ko ajhai yad tajai rahechha. |
| Neural | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 01:23 AM
If these words : ATTRACTIVE, WELL-EDUCATED, FINANCIALLY STABLE, describe you, the opposite sex should be beating down your door. Its not easy being single, especially when friends, family and co-workers start questioning if youll ever circle around the holy fire. Eventually, you start questioning yourself: Will I find the right person? Is something wrong with me? Before answering these questions, its important to realise that many people are content living the single life. The following five points may lend some insight as to why you cant seem to settle down. 1] Youre not ready for commitment: Every single human being, whether male or female, wants both freedom and stability. Finding a healthy balance between the two, experts say is a major obstacle to a successful relationship. Man are expected to sow their wild oats until theyre 30, and nobody blinks an eye. For them, a major problem is fear of making a permanent commitment. In the past, people worried: Am I going to settle down with the right person? Am I doing this because of societal pressure or because of an unplanned pregnancy? Men arent the only ones afraid of commitment. Experts say, for most women, being single is a choice, and many are reluctant to give up their territory as well. The steady increase of women in the workforce means that they no longer have to be married for economic reasons. Women now fear losing control in a relationship just as much as men do. These and other fears are partly responsible for the increasing number of couples who decide to live together without getting married. With divorce rates soaring as ever, more and more single people question the need to get married when they can love together. 2] You dont have a life: Love wont come looking for you if youre watching movie every night or working from dawn till dusk. We need to meet 10 people in order to find one who may be an appropriate candidate. Out of these 10, one may be your soul mate. If youre having trouble having potential dates, shake up your routine. Sign up for a class, or volunteer in your community. Find something you like to do, and youll increase the odds of finding someone who shares your interests. Nobody likes a workaholic. Many relationships fail when one partner is obsessed with work. If youre constantly cancelling dates due to work-related emergencies, you may be hiding other problems. 3] Youre too picky: Assessing what you need and want from a relationship is a good idea, but dont go overboard. Many of us have a checklist of characteristics we look for in a partner and relationship. When an item of that list is not met, we automatically dismiss that individual as a prospect. 4] Youre not over past relationships: We all have baggage, but many people let failed relationships affect their self-esteem. Dont develop a doomsday attitude about relationships. When a relationship doesnt work, it shouldnt distract you from who you are. Women who have been burned several times in relationships may decide its easier to remain single. Those who have been abused or misused are likely to choose not to be involved ever again. As soon as a relationship crumbles, they blame themselves and dont recover as fast as men do. Take advantage of your time alone to reflect on past relationships. Being single is a time to learn how to make healthier, happier choices. Before getting involved again, determine who you are as a person. Figure out your quirks, your likes and dislikes and decide what you really want and need in a relationship. 5] Youre getting desperate: For some of us, the pressure to get married starts at age 25. By the mid-30s, people start raising their eyebrows. After 40, people start gossiping about your inability to find someone. By keeping the need for a mate in perspective, we give ourselves more choices. If people learn to date smart, theyll marry smart. Recognise when you are compatible with a person and when the potential for a healthy relationship is there. Single people suffering from marriage anxiety tend to give off signs and signals that frighten prospective partners away. Dating is a chance to get to know someone, but it shouldnt feel like an audition. When you relax and take the pressure away, love will find you when you least expected it. In the meantime, concentrate on yourself. Love your life and look your best at all times. After all, you never know when you might meet that special someone. |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 01:51 AM
My hats off to the person from the Land of Rising Sun! For a balanced view, I appreciate more such analysis and opinions from all (male, females, smart, naive, etc) interested in this topic. So far the perspectives are mostly from guys... |
| phateko_kattu | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 03:36 AM
Sarbapratham ta yesh bishaya ma bhaag linu huney sapurna mahanubhaav harulai kattu ko koti koti NAMASKAR CHA !! Poonte ji ko uttar ma nikkai weight cha ,tesaile uhaan lai mero CHADKE SALAAM CHA !! ------------------------------------ Mero Uttar yesh prakar cha .... "Women are like Red wine ,older they get tastier they become ";-).Assuming SMART nepali women as High quality french wine ,one should not be surprised to see the lack of wine drinkers in our soceity as most of them are limited to cheaper Khukuri rum ,dudhiya special ,golden grape and teen paate rakshi or chyaang .Eventually some foreigners will drink our high quality local wine because they can afford them . In a seperate note I have a suggestion to our high quality local wine .DONT BE TOO PICKY .There is a proverb in Nepali language for naari jaati ...... "Shoon Pauda Hira Khojchan , Pachi chaandi pani napaunda Taamaa sanga bikchan " English version : "When they get Gold ,they ask for diamond later on when they dont even get silver they sell themselves for Bronze So there is no harm Nepali women doctor marrying fellow Compounder Nepali Mangaer marrying fellow assistant manager Nepali driverni marrying fellow nepali Khalaashi etc . |
| SITARA | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 04:58 AM
To Be Or Not To Be.... DUMB!!! That seems to be the question that hounds women these days. Do "I" pretend to be dumb so I can get me a man who does not get intimidated by my ability to think for myself? Do I need to exert my smartness to pretend dumbness to catch me a feller whose smartness needs to be validated?! OR.... Do I remain an independent thinker (aloof from the marital "norms "of society) and wait for the one who can appreciate my brains, as a contributing agent to a strong, healthy relationship without having to walk on eggshells lest my partner's fragile ego be shattered!!!!! OR Do I remain picky/single and deprive myself of scintillating conversations bordering on "I wanna look/act/seem dumb so you are impressed by me"!!!! So... the mind boggling question for me remains: Is Dumbness in fashion; is it a hype or is it just another celebrated virtue that many seek in a woman????!!! Hai hai what a dilemma! Oh bhunte ji, what a question. Hear Ye! Hear Ye! All intelligent beings! Give me a man who can celebrate my humanity, "womanity", vanity as well as my intellectual sanity and together we'll enhance and celebrate eachother's emotional, mental, physical, psychological............... intelligence!!! ;) Happy Dashain To All !!!! |
| SimpleGal | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 07:27 AM
If you guys find an answer, lemme know! ;) |
| disco | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 08:31 AM
I've gotta storie to tell you smart folks, You see I am the dumbest guy in this living world, and i am a regular at a club appropriately named "THE DUMB CLUB". I have met many dumb women from all over the world who come here as well, but never a dumb Nepali, neither male nor female. Not yet anyways. One night I met this woman who happened to be a Nepali, like always, I started our conversation asking if she came here because she was dumb, and she said she was, as a matter of fact she was not only dumb, she was ugly too (just to my taste!) . She seemed excited to meet a dumb Nepali guy, as I was to see her. It was obvious that she was trying to hit on me and I was also trying to hit on her (hitting from left to right, as we dumb people like to say, (sorry, I know that was a dumb one)). As we talked I mentioned to her that I had co-authored the book "A to Z for a Dumb-ass", which she had read, she was Impressed. Well, the night came to an end, like all dumb things come to an end we like to believe, we exchanged phone numbers and took to our ways. When I got home there was a message on the answering machine saying "..Mr, Dumdass, this is Damina, I had a real good time at the Dumb Club, but lets end what could be between us, you see I am looking for the dumbest guy and you came out not so dumb.." she went on.." first, how can a person, who writes a book be so dumb?, you see I,..I,..I, anyways, please don't call me and if you see me again, please look the other way.", "but no hard feelings yeah?, and good luck to you. Well, yeah may be she was right, but she was not dumb either..if she was, she could not have drawn such a conclusion now.. could see?? She would have fallen for me. ..and the moral of this story is, shit! What was I trying to say???, Well, you smart folks take what you may from it and,..and, anyhow, I hope you enjoyed my little dumb story. |
| suva chintak | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 08:40 AM
Our weighty attention has been belatedly drawn to the question: "WHY SMART NEPALI WOMEN CAN'T FIND COMPATIBLE PARTNERS?" ruck says, "Says who??????" And rightfully so! Speaking from our own long experience, the very premise of this query is , well, questionable. Just look into my large harem of some of the smartest Nepali women, and you would know that this question is a non-starter. They couldn't be happier, like the merry wives of Windsor! I can furnish written testimonials from satisfied parties. So those smart ones looking for a compatible partna, you know know where to knock! Let not the soothsayers of doom and gloom lead you astray from your destiny! Please apply asap to: Suva Chintak Palais de Hunky-dory South of France PS: IQ scores not required for acceptance as matter ultimately triumphs over mind :) |
| dharma_sankat | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 08:48 AM
I think it's pretty obvious.. smart women want smart guys. |
| czar | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 08:58 AM
Sitara cherie, I am willing and able to take up the gaunlet. Throw in some aloo ko achaar and its a deal. I'll even peel the spuds. What sayest thou ? Simpy hajur, The answer to your query is too explosive to reveal here and thus requires private consultation. The fee is a modest bottle of Moet & Chandon's bubbly. I have the candles and matches. |
| SITARA | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 09:17 AM
"Just look into my large harem of some of the smartest Nepali women,"... Suva Chintak And how smart are THOSE women of the harem that keep Suvaji beaming, gleaming and servicing! Suva da Handi man!!! :P CZAR ji: Wining and dining with some potato peeling thrown in? Killing two birds with one stone? Planning to start a harem just like the industrious Suva ji??? hehehe!!! ;) |
| Poonte | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 09:28 AM
There are those who are dumb, and know they are dumb. They are dumb. There are those who are dumb, and know not they are dumb. They are dumber. There are those who are dumb, and know they are dumb, but like to pretend they are not dumb, they are the dumbest! Dumb, dumber, dumbest...not dumb, not dumber, not dumbest...what the heck...know who you are, be who you are, yearn not to prove who you are (therefore seek not too hard), and if one still can't find a compatible partner, then I would attest to the fact that the whole world is dumberer than the dumbest. In which case, come hither my not-s0-dumb and single apsaras...I will be happy to make you my 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th... ~ That is, if the law and the JETHI allows! eheheh Knowingly dumb, Sincerely at your service, Poonte. |
| czar | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 09:35 AM
Harem scare em ? ! |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 10:11 AM
Very interesting!! What smartness is? Whom I say smart? Who is the real smart? Is that ego that presumes oneself smart? These questions are always floating in my mind. This is my opportunity to put these questions among the wise peoples of Sajha, big brains of Sajha. Please forgive me for my always long postings, I believe in clear explanation of matter. I appreciate your patience. Why smart girls can not find a competitive partner? Because she knows she is smart. She has image of her in her mind that she is better than others. She has some quality in her that is considered rare in the world, ie smartness. Whether guy or girl whoever thinks he/she is smart, there is problem. There is ego. And my friends, this ego gives a lot of pain, a lot of pain. For me the yardstick to measure the smartness is humbleness. If one is really smart one will be humble and simple. Somebody said, Jun dali ma fal lagchha jhukne chalan chha! Jasko man ma gyan jagchha binamra hunchha!! Absolutely true. If someone is wise one will be so humble. One will be always leaned head. One of the smartest personalities, Guru Nanak used to say to his god, Tere dasauka ka dash hai ye Nanak. Dasauka das! Slave of slaves. How egoless is he! He made Das to general people and himself becomes das of the people. How can you see his smartness, that smartness which made millions of followers? I will be tired if I say how humble the Buddha was. What to talk about Buddha, a question was asked to his disciple Dalai Lama at UC Birkley( I guess or in Colorado) that about his experience. He said to the reporter, we all have experience of our subject. I will have little more experience about Dharma because I have studied and practiced it more than you, but you will have more experience about journalism than me. Then journalist said, this man has a lot potential to express himself something better, but he does not do. True, those who are really smart does not know they are smart. One of the greatest kings of the Indian history, Asoka used to honor everybody with putting his head to their feet. His chief minister said its not good for such an emperor to lean head in front of such simple people like sweepers and servants. Ashok send him to find the price of the human head. He gave heads of many animals including human head to the minister and asked him to act as a butcher and sell those heads. He did. He sold all other heads except human head. He asked people to take human head for free. Nobody agreed. Then Ashok asked to the minister, what is the price of this head? Minister said not a single Masa ( penny), sir. Then he said, so why do you object if I put this priceless head on somebodys head. He had lot to express himself a great personality. How beautiful culture we have if we analyze scientifically. A wife addresses to husband Swami, she becomes Dashi, slave, but the husband address back to her as Devi, and he becomes devotee of her. They give respect to each other. Guys go in depth of our culture, its so admiring. Both are addressing each other with respect. Nobody will be suppressed being small rather one reaches at the top being small. In our tradition woman were never been suppressed. She is Grihalaxmi and most respected and beloved in family and society. Mother word is very much respected, worshiped as goddess and sisters are considered as goddess. But now a days, it seems they are suppressive, I accept the truth. A Rishi was giving blessing to a girl, may you get 11 sons and 12th son will be your husband, this was Vaidic period. Time does matter, now also results are the same. Give respect, get respect. Suppress, explode. This is law of nature. A Tibetan woman was saying to a westerner who went there for mountaining, in your country one who becomes first or who reaches at the top is honored but in our country one who has crushed ego and becomes humble like cow is worshiped . She is partially true, humbles are worshiped even in west. So far there is ego, no happiness; the relationship is bound to end. If you are going to Harvard or MIT or any big school of first tyre, and thats the testimony of being smart, then many scientists and scholars of the world are not smart. If you are always getting good grades in your academic career and that is smartness, then dont say Einstein and Gandhi are smart. Einstein could hardly pass in this schools and Gandhi is always third division which is known as Gandhi division also. If you say that you are smart because you are hired by a good company with over $100K, then dont say that there are smart people in universities who get less than that. If you think that you are smart because you are cleaver of making money, there are only smart people in business forms. If you claim that you are smart because you know a lot about the world, you have great general knowledge, or you know history, geography, science, arts, religion everything, master of known jack of all. Then just suggest studying general knowledge and doing your best to increase the capacity of your hard disk. 100 GB. Its nothing more than a machine job. All machines are smart. contd... |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 10:12 AM
Most of the people will scare of you if you think you are smart. If you think you are smart it will be projected in your behavior, smartness, superiority, and ego. This will reflect someone around you. Everybody knows pretty well how ego smells. Very irritating, many people does not like to have company with egoist or proud. How will you find a partner? Other people do not care whoever you are. They just care how sweet you are. I have a friend; he fell in love with a gurl. Do you know the reason? Because she is humble and simple. She has a lot to proud of; she has a lot to show up. But she does not do. He is crazy after her. She said she does not have any feeling for him. He never cares, never trust her. Crazy. I asked him so many times, why do you love some one who does not love you? Why dont you look for somebody else? He said no one is of his type except her. I told him she may not be as you think of her. She must have some negative aspects you may not know. Thats the love, he said. Love does not see the weak points. Her weaknesses are mine and I will help her to correct. See how humbleness makes people crazy after. He comes running to me, Dhanju, she loves me, trust me. I asked him did she say that she loves you. Answer is no. I ask him to meditate. See the feelings, that is just your feeling, it is impermanent, it will pass away sooner or later. That feeling goes away, then next feeling comes, Dhanju she does not love me. May see get a nice prince who is great from all aspects. I ask him to stop nonsense. You will be like Prof. Nyas of beautiful mind. He would have gone crazy if he did not have under my shadow. I know his medicine well. Attraction is not her smartness but her simplicity. Everybody like happiness. Earning money is also for happy life. Poor people thinks comfort will give happiness. If you are egoist only greedy people favor you. Because ego and greed both are defilements they tuned up as humbleness and happiness are tuned up as a purity of mind. One has to learn to live; one should have an art of living. This is what is necessary in life. People get great degrees for comfortable and easy life. They believe easy and comfortable life is happy life so everybody is looking for this. But in the inner core of mind it is somewhere there that happiness comes from humbleness. So they look for humble friends. You can definitely say that you are smart. You can not be said smart only because you have mastery over a particular field. That is just a craft. You can claim that you know everything about that craft as research scientists claim that they know everything in their field that is yet known to mankind. This has nothing to do with smartness. Ask yourself; observe yourself, how much ego you have crushed? How cleaver you are to tackle the temptations of life? How cleaver you are to keep the balance of your mind in adverse situation of life? How much do you care of yourself and others? How much attractive you are for the people around you? The positive answer of these questions determines that you are really smart. I never forget to tell my teacher Buddhas word. He left no field to be explored, he entered every field. I gonna tell you his word related to this discussion. CHANDANANG TAGARNG WA PI, UPPALANG ATHA BASSIKI. SABBESANG GANDHA JATANANG, SILA GANDHO ANNUTTARO. Chandan, Tagar(a type of flower), lotos, and Bassik(may be a type of flower) have their fragrance is limited around them and it is incomparable to the fragrance of Sila, (ie morality, simplicity, humbleness). The fragrance of humbleness will not be limited to you; it will spread, certainly spread. Everybody will try to have this great flower. If you are not humble but have lots of degree and craft of the modern age, this flower is like flower of colored papers, with no fragrance. Few people will try to own that flower. But if you have great degrees and are multi crafted person but ego within you, you are like a flower giving bad smell. Nobody will try to own you. This is true for girls as well as boys. Another thing is lack of communication. We are in 21st century but we are unable to expose our real self to many. Lack of communication gap or bad communication system is causing problem to find right person. I have some friends doing their Ph.D, they also have the same comment that they are not finding compatible partner. I have seen many friends who are Ph.D or big degrees, married with someone who has high school degree or undergraduate. I dont know the reason but there is no other way around. There is most important reason of all that I am not going to tell you. I tell this directly to the person, knowing about him or her. This is the master reason of the question. Dhananjaya. |
| Garibjanata | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 11:06 AM
Dhananjaya, Lots of google copy paste going on or what? Copying from here and there and trying to pharaphrase so it appears like yr own creation. |
| maiiya | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 12:59 PM
Hi, Interesting question. I think smart nepali women can't seem to find a smart neapli man because she's looking for someone more smarter than herself so that she can respect and admire him.But you know how most of the nepali men think: if she's my gf/wife I need to dominate kinda attitude.Now adays women don't want to be dominated but to be loved, respected and admired.And most nepali men don't seem to do that.For them it's like "ghar ki murgi daal barabar!!" It's sad but it's true most men inspite of education are still the same old narrow mind.So, a smart nepali women prefers to remain single than be dominated by a silly man. |
| maiiya | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 01:01 PM
Gator_guy, "i like smart women, but cant bear ghamandi ones (thats why i am still single). I do have space for what i call DESERVING arrogant, but have never found anyone like that. " Still single & smart???????? What's your e-mail re?;) |
| nepal_ko_chhoro | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 01:29 PM
may be smart guys are going back to get married ...... i know many of my friends did that. |
| lonely | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 01:59 PM
hi women out there, I am here, where r u looking for...re kya aajha... always lonely, |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 02:29 PM
Garib Ji, Thanks for your coments. I rarely answer the comments but I love to answer yours. There is nothing my creation in my postings. All is already known facts but those messages are floating in my mind and they are typed by me. Please read those, you will find you know them already. Thank you, Dhananjaya |
| suva chintak | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 02:30 PM
Sitara jyu asks of me: "And how smart are THOSE women of the harem that keep Suvaji beaming, gleaming and servicing?" This is a trade secret, so it will have to stay strictly between you and me. I am sure you understand the need for secrecy in this line of business...the competition is murderous! The harem applicasion form allows the contestants to substitute their IQ, SAT, and GRE scores with their vital statistics if they so wish. I know that's bending the rules a little, but hay, someone has to cut some slack for the hidden talents...and I have always questioned the validity of standardized testing to measure human potential. So we end up with a stable full of charming, engaging and vivacious ladies who are emotionally smart. Sure, they are no rocket scientists, but they sure make my world go around! How smart can you ask for? SC, the smart option for the smart gals...baby, you have come a long way! (courtesy of the Virginia slims) |
| gator_guy | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 04:35 PM
Maiiya, I think i agree with ur opinion. I have felt that many nep men wanna see their wife like ghar ki murgi. But i must HONESTLY disclose that such thinking is not of my type (gator guy ko dhaatnee bani chainaa). speaking frankly, i cannot envision myself dominating my gf/wife. rather than spending time dominating her, i prefer making time to give her a warm place in my arms (Just gotta track the deserving one) Ani Maiiya,,i would not say i am smart (thats left 4 u to find out). ra email add ko kura chahi - for me sajha posting is fine than getting personal emaill (so lets give up the email stuff). |
| maiiya | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 05:14 PM
Whatever gator_guy!! It was just meant as humor since you said you were single!! V |
| maiiya | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 05:23 PM
Hi nepal ko choro: I don't think it's a smart move for ALL smart men to find smart women in nepal.Think of all the trouble they have to deal with..first choose a bride within a month, then the visa issue, then the compability issue, then the education and language barrier, what about culture barrier, then the driving classes, adaptation issues........a smart man literally has to teach "smart" woman everything to be a "smart" woman here in America!! I would not call that smart! Smartness would be if he finds a smart woman right here..whom he loves and goes on with his life without all those hassles mention above!! Now I think that would be smart! |
| czar | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 05:50 PM
Cherie, After putting in considerable thought about that harem you proposed, I most reluctantly consent to it despite all my misgiving. Since you insist on it, I find no viable option but to be a good sport, grin and bear it. It pleases me to please you thus. All in the interest of peace and harmony. Czar poste script: Resolved to carry out my responsibilities in an energetic manner and to further amity and good will, could you also prepare momo and the proposed aloo ko achaar ? Thank you for being ever so and kind and understanding. |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 05:54 PM
Hi Dhananjaya jeu, Very informative and soothing post! The more I climbed up the stairs while reading your post...the greater peace I found w/i my soul! :-) Thank you :-)! Hope to read more souL soothing writings of urs in the near future. Take care, Interrupted_GurL! Poo dai & everyone, :-)! |
| vivid | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 06:09 PM
My! My! A shoal of smart guys. Smart ladies, fish them out before they get caught in the net of other smart lasses. When opportunity is at your doorstep, why go looking for it elsewhere?? Me heading towards the South of France, ;-). With wine I will dine, Smart lad be fine, In thy presence I shine, Never will I whine! Am I smart enough to fish you??? |
| SITARA | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 06:19 PM
CZARji: Oh sire, how could you deliberately misunderstand a question for a proposition? You do bring me to shame for counter-proposing that I join your fledging harem...harrrrumph!!!!! Suva ji: Tsk! tsk! such blatant display of debauchery, decadence and degeneration!!! Is such a lascivious, lecherous and scandalous behavior a prequel to your "action-packed" trip to Mongolia?? Mongolia beware! Here comes Suva the Harem Hunter of the Himalayas (Courtesy: National Geographic)!!! |
| ashu | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 07:51 PM
Bhunte, If this "smart" woman (with "smart" defined as someone who can make the best of what she has at any given time) --smiles and laughs easily --gets along well with a variety of friends --has the kind of egoless self-confidence (you know it when you see it) that does NOT border on arrogance or haughtiness or aloofness -- loves the movies, the Beatles, and even Bach, Deep Shrestha and Nabin K. Bhattarai numbers --enjoys discussing books, ideas and related stuff with a genuine sense of curiosity over a lazy Sunday brunch without getting, you know, all academically stuffy and heated --loves the outdoors: the whole hiking, trekking, exploring-new-places routine --able to take success and failures in life in strides, and with a good cheer. --helpful to others . . . . In all of the above cases, please feel free to give her my number. :-) As my all-time favorite movie "Casablanca" puts it: "This could be the start of a beautiful relationship." oohi "still drunk on the happiness about the positive verdict an Evaluation Team gave to the office ko work" ashu ktm,nepal |
| le chef du nuit | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 07:53 PM
f all that why cant a smart nepali guy like me find a partner? now thats a burning question |
| bold | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 08:36 PM
ka ho sabail neplai daju bhai ta kasaila tapai bhanos na bhano afai mapai,why guys u urself think you are smart ha ha ha same on your self |
| KaleKrishna | Posted
on 23-Sep-03 08:42 PM
Ashuji, I can,t meet your achievments tara tapai lai aeko offer pache ko chai malai divert garedinu hola. I expect you will be looking for all those you mention, for me something less will also do, any smart girls listening (I mean reading). Nepali girl's smartness ko salient features haru k k hun ta? |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 08:19 AM
Dear Interrupted Girl, I am friend of all but I am best friend of interrupted one. I have read your threads. Whoever has interrupted you must be a lucky one. May your aspiration be fulfilled soon. Diwangi to ko hi aap se sikhe. Muhabat karna to ko hi aap se sikhe. Aap nahi rahenge bekarar aab, Ham ne aap se ye dosti jo ki hai. likthe hai do kalaam aap ke naam Hame dosti ki kasam, Aap ke aman(peace) ka khayal rakhange hum. Diwangi ki haad tak muhabat ki hai aapne. Bafaau se vi badkar wafa ki hai aapne. Jo vi hai o jaha bhi hai jis jahanme. Bas aap par fida hai a eki hai hame. O jarur aayenge aap ke pas ek din. Rahana sakenge o vi aap ke bin. Aap vi unpar pura aitabar kijiye. Aap vi unpar khud ko nichawar kijiya. Kudrat ka kanun hai, Har achhain rang latihai. Aap ki neki ki to baat hi kya, Aap ne to missal-e-muhabat ki hai. Jisne aap ko darda diya hai, Kaun jane, aap hi ka didar karta ho. Jisne aap ko bekarar kiya hai, Kaun jane, kaun jane, O bhi aap tak pahucchne ka rasta dhudta ho. Dhananjaya |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 02:23 PM
Ashu, >>>>>>In all of the above cases, please feel free to give her my number. :-) <<<<<< I will do that. |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 02:33 PM
Sitara jyu le banayeko Aloo ko Achhar ma pet chireko hariyo khursani hunchha ki hundaina? Ani methi besar ra tel le jhannu hunchha ki hundaina? kahilye nabirsine kisim ko spicy achhar banaunu hola hai, natra ta hamro Czar jyu ko jibro khallo hola. I don't want to read him writing "kasto lati lai mwaii khayeko jasto achhar parchha yes pali ta" ...eheheh |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 02:34 PM
parchha=parechha |
| SimpleGal | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 05:40 PM
Dhetterika! Ahile samma answer bhetiya chhaina????? Ke ho esto??? hehehe....Me is parkhing hai! ;)) |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 07:18 PM
Simplu, Rather we are 'parkhaing' what the psychology/sociological literature offers about the issue! Would you please help 'nirahi prani' like us??? |
| bold | Posted
on 24-Sep-03 10:56 PM
wow wow wow dhanjayji apka ka kahayna |
| bideshi | Posted
on 25-Sep-03 06:53 AM
Well,let me put my opinion! Men , though they act brave and strong are coward inside(not all though but vast majority are ) and they are scared to be with women who can challenge them or let's say who can be their competitor,and moreover they definitetly don't want their wives to earn more than them or be more smart than them.They think women are inferior to them.Since our childhood,men are taught to be smart,act brave,go outside and to protect women while women are taught to stay at home,do household chores,to be polite and to act as a shy ,nice person.And when one is grown in such environment,how can he accept the fact that his wife is smarter than him,earns more than him.He wants to be her hero,he wants to be the breadwinner,he wants to show how much he loves him by fulfilling all her wishes while she stays at home and he works and earns for her.He wants to protect her from all evils,just like in hindi movies.Men are scared of the society as people in our society are infact more responsible to look down upon the guys who earn less their wives or whose wives are smarter than their husbands.They make fun of such guys if they find out that and people in our society find out this because of their gossiping nature which is very common . They want to be the protector,breadwiner and ofcourse more superior than the women .It's nautre ,ofcourse everybody wants to be that.And Luckily in our society men got that chance!! Don't get angey guys !Just put my opinion! |
| SimpleGal | Posted
on 25-Sep-03 06:53 AM
Bhunte dai, I would be glad to help re kya ajha. But I am both hesitant and opposed to using the label "smart" in the query you have posed above. Words like "smart," "intelligent," "educated" and so forth are very misleading as they imply the converse for the those who may not receive these labels. I am assuming that I do not need to familiarize the readers to the vast and negative implications that the Eugenics movement created, the most blatant one being the genocide called the Holocaust. However, for the scope of your question, I would have to play around with the label "smart" that you have chosen for the women in question. First, what does one imply in saying "smart" woman? I mean, is it evaluated in terms of her academic qualifications? Or her common sense? Or her "street smartness"? Or her artistic abilities? Or her knack for running a household with committment and felicity? Or the level of her ambitions and her "visible" efforts toward attaining them? These are only *some* of the parameters within which "smartness" can be described. There may be plenty more and subject to variables such as culture, generation, etc. A smart woman in a particular society who is able to enthrall the audience with her academic and verbal acumen because it values such merits may not necessarily be considered "smart" in a society which values docility as a sign of "smartness." So, we need to first "contextualize" smartness before we even begin to search for answers. And a lot of the psych/social literature both acknowledges and ignores these important factors. I remember reading an article several years ago that highlighted 7 women considered to be the most educated, well-achieved, wealthy, beautiful and so forth among women in America. They ranged from professors to CEOs of companies. Now these women, if I recall correctly, expressed difficulty in finding the right partner who appreciated their ambitions, supported their efforts, and valued them as equally as any other woman who chose to be something else. There was no absolute and conclusive resolution to the quandary of finding a compatible partner. One of the reasons that I personally feel contributed to this lack of a sound resolution that would perhaps satisfy both themselves and readers like you and me and your friend who originally posed this question to you, is the fact that "smartness" among these woman ranged widely. Therefore I think that their experiences depended on what the men in their lives valued and did not find in them. Another misleading aspect of your question is the assumption that smart nepali women "can't find" compatible partners. "Can't find" implies a deadlock situation which does not paint an accurate picture of "smart" women's experiences. Here I agree with Ruck. Rather than "can't find" we can say that such women have a tough time finding a right match. It may take them a longer time because of whatever reason, but it is certainly not true that they "can't find" partners at all !!! This is what I have to contribute so far. I'll update information if necessary. In peace. |
| bideshi | Posted
on 25-Sep-03 08:34 AM
Sorry for the grammatical mistakes! |
| Ruby | Posted
on 25-Sep-03 01:56 PM
One word....Abhiman! |
| ou812 | Posted
on 25-Sep-03 04:33 PM
Why the need for a compatible partner, when you can have millions of incompatible? By process of trial an error, you be a better human being and be the compatible one. Bugfree........ Blue Whale has tongue a size of an Elephant and 17 foot pecker, but has throat the size of a china plate You can teach an octupus to open a bottle cap, a woman can't An octupus makes love with it's third tentacle The dryest place one earth is Antarctica, hasn't rained in last 2 million years |
| yoUnGbLooDZ | Posted
on 25-Sep-03 10:52 PM
uhh!! okie.. |
| SimpleGal | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 09:02 AM
LOL @ ashish....indeed, you have one heck of a smart lady in your life! :) |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 01:59 PM
I have two questions. One for man and one for woman. To man: Why do many man want respect from their wives? The ward respect is very holly. It shoud be treated with honor. Respect should come from heart, inner core of the heart. Only those people deserve respect who has love, compassion and goodwill in their mind. you don't deserve respect just becasue you are elder. you don't deserve respect just because you are in good position, you are in upper cast, you are some authority. Love people, help people, give them out what you can and what they need, they will pay you back an honor, they will fold their hand to express their gratitude, they will bend down even will put their head on your feet to express their gratefulness. Give a piece of bread to hungry, give a glass of water to thrusty, they will be happy and will be grateful to you. they will tell you some words of honor or express some signs of honor. That is respect. You really have to own respect, earn respect. You have to behave such a way that the people around you should feel to respect you, oner you. don't look for mechanical respect that a student gives to his teacher, don't looks for a salute which is given by an army man to his senior. I don't like the mechanical respect which is given by youngers of our society to the elders. Naman, what the word Naman mean? this mean to bend the head. Head is a sign of pride, ego. Psychologically, if you remember yourself, you remember your face, the top most part, the head. the head, representative of ego, goes to the feet the lowest part of the body. What this symbol means, this shows the dissolution of ego. I mean not much. pride goes away. ego goes away. you guys want your wife to Naman you? What you will get? those who will put their head on your feet will feel egolessness if they have done it correctly. But if you are not egoless, you will destroy yourself. Your ego will get inflated and it will bring death misery. Thats why respect is only given to wise person and mature person.if you talk about pure culture respect is given only to egoless peopel so that their ego will not get inflated. they have already crushed the ego, now no chance of distroying themselves. You might have heard, its holy to touch Brahmans feet but sin to touch Sudras feet. Never get confused by the word Brahman. Nobody can be Brahman by birth. One can not be Brahman simply because he born in a family known as Brahman. Brahman is one who knows Brahma, the ultimate truth. Sudra is one who is ignorance, does not know truths and ultimate truth. Test yourself guys, if you are not wise enough dont' expect respect. this respect will spoil you. You will feel that you are the one who is for getting respect and your wife is one who is for giving respect. This is not true. Old days, woman used to address man as Swami, Pati, both the words mean Master, owner. She is acting as a slave. What will be the position of a slave, slave does not won anything, everything is owned by masters. How ego free address! Buddha said to his diciples as Bhikkus, means beggers. All is to be ego free. So woman is saying herself as slave. she is considering herself not more than a slave. But, what is her position in home, she is Ghrihalaxmi, she is the real owner of house. The hosband address her Devi, means goddess. Husband becomes her devotee. She is someone to be worshipped, Devi. Both are doing equal effort to be egoless. Both are trying to kill ego. Since the elders used to be learned and wise, so youngers had to pay respect to them. They had to bend their head, the representative of ego. All the systems were to kill ego. to set oneself free from this gaint evil ego. Since we have never exmained ourself we don't know how much pain the ego gives us. As ego is striked, it gives a lot pain my friends. It hurt if someone disrespect you, it hurts if someone scolds you, it hurts if someone go against you, it hurts if somebody your closest does not listen to you, so many examples. the cause is ego. as much as we get victory over ego that much happiness is bound to come. This is the great gift of our ancesters. They wanted to make an egofree society so made such wonderful rules of respect in a house, but later on the process became mechanical. people did not understand it and made them as rites and rituals and dogmas. contd............ |
| john doe | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 02:12 PM
Ok...time out...bear with me here - I find the very question offensive because it implies that only dumb nepali women have so far been successful in finding compatible partners. This further implies that most Nepali couples in the US are...well, dumb! Miss BoredToDeath, your question is presumptuous at best. Lemme take the liberty of rephrasing it to " Why can't I find a compatible partner?" Try answering that first, Miss BoredToDeath, and then we shall see about those "smart" women out there. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 03:00 PM
Now a days a housewife must give respect to her husband, origionally it was not like that. Now a days every youngers in age or relation must pay respect to elders no matter how much fool the elder be. Is this sounds scientific? not at all. One has to love his wife, show her the rightious path for her long term welfare, help her and make her happy, then he is real elder and deserve respect. If some woman can do this then she is mother of her husband. Mirgar got wisdom from his daughter inlaw Bishaka, so Bishakha is known as Mirgarmata, mother of Mirgar. She got honor of being mother of her own father-in-law. Anybody can be wise. More and more you will be ego free, less you care about the respect. You will jsut love, you will not expect in return. A sage Byas composed Bhagawat and the hero of Bhagawat, ShreeKrishna said to Narad(i guess to Narada, it's been long i last read Bhagawat) that, "Narad I love everybeings equally". Then Narad asked, Bhagwan what about your Bhaktas? Its not fare if you love those who does not love you and who loves you equally. Your Bhaktas loves you so much that they are ready to die for you where as there are some beings who are against you. Its not fair to love equally. then krishna said, "Narad, i am indebted of my Bhaktas, I have nothing to pay their debt". Really, you must be indebted of those who loves you. If your wife is really respect you out of love, be indebted to her. Don't try to look for someone who give you mechanical respect, who always remains supressive. you love your ego so much so that you want someone who sings the song of your ego. i am writing this because most of the guys have written their comments on the support of having supressive wife. But if your wife is really egoist and not wise, then that will be tough life for you. Question to women: Whay do you want to have compatible partner? you want to have compatible partner because you are scared to be insulted from your friends for having noncompatibel partner? Then believe me or not, ego is the main factor here. You want to be respected among your friends through your partner. You want to take pleasure of having a partner who has potential. its simply like getting internal pleasure of having nice goods like diamond ring, BMW car, beautiful house etc. Don't point finger to me. Ask this question to yourself and analyse. If yes, for you, in your subconsious mind a husband is nothing more than a physical object. you want to have compatible partner because you want to respect your partner. Ok. thats good. Be careful! if you mean you are smart because you have good degree and your compatible partner also mean having similar education and you are giving respect to him. He may misuse your respect. he may inflat the ego and think that you are made to give him respect and he is made to get respect. if you are saying that all degree holders are open minded and wise, i have to say nothing. All in all, what i want to say you that wisdom is most important thing in life. if you have a congugal life hundreds of thousands of ideas will be cooked in the mind of each and you may not find the hole in the boat. Man or woman no matter. Don't say you want this and that. you like this and this. liking and disliking moments are always there. Make wisdom as a weapon to keep the balance of life. problem sounds manny in life, but their root is one and only one which is ignorance. This ignorence give birth to the ego and this is ego is playing with us. Light on the candle of wisdom, kill ignorence there will be no ego and no misery. Dhananjaya |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 03:27 PM
Thanks Dhananjaya :-). Uhm...u mentioned, "in your subconsious mind a husband is nothing more than a physical object." Uhm...I closed my eyes and pictured the word husband in my mind...things that surfaced were: My life, father to my unborn :-) children, my heart, my best friend...! Uhm...I didnot see any physical objects! Hm..................! *sigh!* Pehaps, I misread & misunderstood ur statement! |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 03:54 PM
Dear Interrupted Girl, What I mean is clear. What you want with your husband that makes husband an object or a living Devata. If you want compatible partner just because you want to honor from society, its root is ego and analyse, you will understand what I mean. I expalin clearly because I want people to understand the reality. These are not my feelings, these are my understandings. you will understand the same if you analysise. Analysise does not mean to open the eyes and see what comes up. Think, this si so and so, that is so and so, becasue of that, this happened and if this happen that is bound to happen. this is way of analysis. The best way of analysis is explore yourself. This needs someone very learned to teach. I am fool and ignorent, can not teach self exploration. As you master self exploration once, you will no longer be interrupted one. You will be so happy person. I told you I am best friend of yours. I want to see you happy. May you come out of our interruption soon! May you have peace and harmony of mind soon!! May you be happy, so happy !!! Dhananjaya |
| Major | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 04:13 PM
Long odds for love By Stephanie K. Taylor The Washington Times www.washingtontimes.com Thursday, September 25, 2003 Denise Rose has a master's degree in counseling. Her most recent ex-husband has a high school diploma."I'm the only one I know who married beneath me," sighs the twice- divorced Knoxville, Tenn., resident. But then, as she starts naming her friends and family, Mrs. Rose realizes she is far from alone. Several women she knows have higher levels of education than their husbands. Their marriages just didn't end quite so badly. From Shakespeare's "The Taming of the Shrew" to John Gray's "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus," the battle of the sexes has been a common theme for writers. But that struggle has become more desperate -- and promises to become more so, says political science professor Andrew Hacker. Talk of a "gender gap" long ago entered the political lexicon, but Mr. Hacker says that while women have improved their levels of educational and career attainment, these gains have not added to their prospects for romantic success. In his latest book, "Mismatch: The Growing Gulf Between Men and Women," Mr. Hacker finds evidence of diverging trends in marriage and divorce, educational aspirations and politics: o According to the Census Bureau, among wives ages 25 to 34 who have bachelor's degrees, 35.6 percent of their husbands have a lower level of schooling. o Women who earn more than $100,000 a year are twice as likely to have never married and almost four times as likely to get divorced, compared to other women. o Only 6.8 percent of divorces were filed jointly, while 60.7 percent were initiated by wives and 32.5 percent begun by husbands, according to the Department of Health and Human Services. o In 1970, 72.9 percent of female college graduates had their first child by age 30, while now only 36.6 percent of that same demographic are mothers, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. o In the 1996 presidential contest, 43 percent of male voters supported President Clinton compared with 54 percent of female voters -- the largest gender gap in the history of presidential elections. o In 2000, 57.2 percent of bachelor's degrees, 48.9 percent of Ph.D.s and 42.7 percent of medical degrees were awarded to women, as compared with women in 1960, who received only 38.5 percent of bachelor's degrees, 10.5 percent of Ph.D.s and 5.5 percent of medical degrees. Although the trend toward women's educational advantage crosses all socioeconomic levels, the trend is more pronounced among low-income groups, says Wayne Upshaw, senior scholar at the Washington-based Pell Institute for the Study of Opportunity in Higher Education. "If you look at the problem, it is really distributional, meaning that it happens in a certain sector -- the most glaring being the lower-income sector," Mr. Upshaw says. Boys from low-income families are turned off to education at an early age, he says, and they never seem to catch up from there. "We live in a knowledge-based society, and knowledge plays a role in global competition," Mr. Upshaw says. "Our industrial competition could be compromised because our workers are going to be less educated." But as women become more numerous in the ranks of college-educated professionals, their chances of finding similarly educated husbands decline. "If she's a lawyer," says Mr. Hacker, "will she really be happy with an electrician? I don't think so." Whereas women used to settle for the boy next door, Mr. Hacker says, they now want a spouse who shares their intellectual and political interests. As they receive praise and validation from their professional successes, they expect to receive the same level of respect when they return home. Men, however, have different expectations of a marriage -- they want a nest, Mr. Hacker says. "There's a gender difference in what people consider a good marriage," says Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, author of "Why There Are No Good Men Left: The Romantic Plight of the New Single Woman." She notes that women have been the primary ones initiating divorces since the 1920s. "Women's growing independence and lack of social-stigma pressures on women to stay in a marriage that is unhappy are one reason for this trend," Mrs. Whitehead says. But it's not just the women who are leaving. Although the majority of divorces are filed by women, the "men's liberation" movement has allowed men -- with or without children -- to leave their families without experiencing censure from society. "It used to be that, hey, you were kind of a pariah if you did that, called irresponsible, if not immoral," Mr. Hacker says. "Today, we all have friends, men, who have initiated divorce, leaving behind a couple of kids." As men remarry -- usually with significantly younger women -- and start new families, he says, their interaction with children from their first marriages may decrease. America has shifted from a society that emphasized family loyalty to a society that focuses on individual liberation, Mr. Hacker says, and there will be consequences. "We're going to see fewer future couples in sustainable relationships," says Mr. Hacker. And as marriages are more unstable and people experience more frequent short-term relationships, there will be less consistency in mutual support and care-giving, says Mrs. Whitehead. "It will have an impact on a society who is aging," she says. "Fasten your seat belts," says Mr. Hacker. "It's going to be a bumpy ride." Source - http://dynamic.washtimes.com/print_story.cfm?StoryID=20030924-095330-8270r |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 26-Sep-03 04:40 PM
Dhananjaya said to Gunakumari that >>>>>I told you I am best friend of yours. I want to see you happy.<<<<< Hmm...I wish you two find a solution soon by reconciing any differnces if any. Make up, but don't break up. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 27-Sep-03 08:17 PM
Dear Bhunte Ji, Thank you very much. If she is the one whom I have interrupted, I will bow down and beg for her forgiveness. I am her guilty and can give me any punishment she want. I will surrender myself. I will make her my life rather just ending up as best friend. I always cry out of compassion if I see somebody is in pain. I dont hurt even an insect; I gave her such a pain? That will be unbearable for me. As I read her threads, most of them are full of pain and almost all are full of restlessness. I know how difficult a single moment of restlessness, probably we all know, she has spent months being restless. I salute her. Most of us try to find new one if our love does not work, but look at her she is same interrupted girl after more than a year. I salute her love. I wish I would be that lucky one who interrupted her. I dont know who is the guy and what special virtue does he possess. I am very much positive that he must also be in love with her. He must be loving her more than she does, that makes her restless and she express it in Sajha. If he did not love her, that would be fault of him, this fault would have made him negative and love can not stay longer with negativity, so her restlessness would have gone. She might have forgotten him. This is my psychological analysis. If both of them love each other, to such extent, what is the factor keeping them away from each other? Well, there must be couple of reasons. One reason is both of them should have inferior feeling about themselves. He must be feeling that he does not have this that and that to give her and she must be feeling she does not have this that and that quality. If the love is pure, it thinks only about giving. Their love must be pure to some extent. I salute that love. If this is true, my friends, there is heaven in front of you, move ahead. Weakness and fault are human, one has to correct them. If someone loves you because of your good aspects and dislike your bad aspects, thats not a right person. A right person will appreciate your good aspects and help you to correct you, out of full compassion. There will be no anger for the mistake and no dislike for weakness. Nobody are perfect my friends. Help each other to be good and to live happy life. Be wise and break down your mental barrier. Another reason can be misunderstanding between them. They may not know each other well. They might have judged each other through a third person. Third person will see from his/hers colored glasses and express according to his/hers mental condition. They should be clever about this. Another reason should be both of them or one of them should be shy or fearful. They may feel comfortable to love but dear not to face each other. They will never get unite if one of them or both can not overcome the shame or fear. I really appreciate G_I. She honored me accepting me as her best friend. She is so open minded person does not hegitate to express her mental feelings. there are few people who post from their heart, she is one of them. I salute you my best friend, keep it on. I have my own story, I will tell someday. I am aslo open minded like G_I, don't hide feelings. But, I don't get restless. I never let my feelings ruin me. I am clever in this sense. If she is wise, she will try to find the solution, she will try to learn to live without interruption under any adverse situation. I can help her out if she is really interrupted and wants to come out of it, wants to live peaceful life. Dhananjaya. |
| ameeshaa | Posted
on 27-Sep-03 11:02 PM
well, i don't know iam smart or not but i am also looking for smart man. is there any smart man here? let me know. |
| Echoes | Posted
on 28-Sep-03 02:39 PM
Ameeshaa-jyu, Fine, but how will you tell if the man is smart if you can't tell whether you are? ;) However, as the originator of this thread, I think Bhunte should define what makes a smart Nepali woman...or man for that matter. I bet his top priority now is finding out who (was he smart?) stole his car's wheel...so whenever he's free! ;) |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 28-Sep-03 05:25 PM
Echoes, It is easier to recover stolen love than that wheel. My current top priority is working on couple of journal papers for a publication. However, I may prepare a synthesis report at the end of the thread. But let other readers continue to pour their feelings here. |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 03:09 AM
Dear Dhananjaya, I am bit confused with which gurl_inturrupted u r referring to. There are two in my list. One has an email as gurlinturupted@..... who represents similar case you have described in the above posts. I asked her about Dhanajaya, but she revealed her innocence about you. So, I am puzzled there. However, the other G_I that I used to talk online never revealed her frustration and tragedy with you. Instead she appeared like Guruma....Umm kasto achamma.... |
| Haribansa | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 07:02 AM
I read your postings DHANANJAYA. I am impressed. Your thoughts on love, interruption is mind blowing. I kept on thinking, thinking and thinking. There are wonderful pple with such a thoughtful thinking in Sajha. How old are you man? I would say 100 years as your thoughts are so down to earth, wise and thoughtful. Anyone been in love or outta love can see what you meant! |
| khai_thachaina | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 09:34 AM
compatibility is inversely proportional to smartness.so as the degree of smartness increases the rate of compatibility decreases.it only depends on u,therefore, whether u want a compatible partner of a smart one.u can only have either of the two.duitai haat ma laddu kahan paincha ra?however Newton ko laws mata exceptions huncha bhane yesma pani awashya nai hunchan hola.i haven`t found any such exceptional cases till this date.i`ll keep u posted till the day i find one.(hopefully!) |
| bored2death | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 10:02 AM
Just a thought!!!! 20 barsa ko kta le pani 18 barsa ko kt taakne, 35 barsa ko budo le pani 18 barsa kai kt taakne, ra pheri umrika ma divorced bhayeko 40 barsa ko kta le pani Nepal ma gaye pachi tehi 18 barsa ko nai kt takne. Thus, the few kts that escape this "safety net" if you will, are by default, headed for the twilght zone, have to decide on an uncompatible partner or remain single! Not a comfortable position to be in! |
| ameeshaa | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 10:35 AM
u r right bored 2 death. that's why women ALWAYS LIE ABOUT THEIR AGE. THEY ALWAYS WANT TO BE 18 |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 02:30 PM
the fat lady next to slim boy 18 must be honey pot then....eheheh |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 03:29 PM
Dear Bhunte Ji, I really appreciate what you have done, my friend. You must be very kind and helpful, very rare qualities in human beings. I have never said that the Gurl_Interrupted is the one whom I have interrupted but I have said that she might be. Thanks she is not. coincidently her postings, posting dates seems related to the events of my life. It should be just synchronization. I had doubt that I might have interrupted somebody, I might have become the cause of restlessness which is great misery itself, fortunately not, I am glad. Even if the girl_Interrupted is the same girl who might have interrupted by me, she will never ever said the truth. She will kill herself within but will never look for solution. good luck to her. Bhunte Ji,I was occasional visitor of this site before I started postings. I am very much intersted to read the column of Gurl_Interrupted with heading "If loving him was a crime, I am guilty". It would be kind if you give me the direction to access this column. Whoever the girl_interrupted is, she is my best friend. I also have loved someone in my life, but I am living uninterrupted life, she also can live. I will write to her later, before this, i want to give some message to one whom I love loved. thank you Bhunte ji, Dhanjaya |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 03:31 PM
sorry,at the end, it should be whom I have loved. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 03:36 PM
message to one whom i have loved: Dear girl, I happened to think for a while that you got interrupted, and releaved when came to know that was a mistake. Never get interrupted, live happy life. I have loved you for years without any condition. You know I never lie; I have not loved you just to possess you. I did not care about you in the beginning until I knew that you are simple and good hearted. I am ready to be a slave of humble peoples but will never accept the kinghood of fools. I believed whatever you said, and never tried to bother you though my heart was telling me that you admire me. I knew that feelings are always impermanent, they arise and pass away, and they are meaningless but I had confident on my mind which hardly go wrong. May be my mind was attacked by deadly virus and it was malfunctioning. In our very short get together, you became so nice to me, may be that generate love for you in my heart. That love gave me pain and the pain gave me experience. You always tried to stop me loving you, but you did not say that you dont love me. I dont know more about you but I would accept all your weaknesses, if you had any, and would help you to correct them. You demoralize me; you thought I am looking for the best and hate weaknesses. I am strict disciplined person, no doubt, but the discipline is for better life, sorry for that you could not feel my love and compassion. I always have loved you, but very few moments I have thought that we will be together someday. You know very well that psychologically I am very strong. No doubt, when I will first hear there is interstellar distance between us; that will hurt me, but it wont make me restless. I know the art of living so never worried about me. I will be happy with you as well as without you. I would have picked you up if I did not have one wrong feeling. That feeling stops me to move forward, it says, I dont have many best things to offer you. I did not tell you this before because I did not want to devaluate you, sorry. I tried to go away form you forever. I tried to get married even without knowing about the girl, it did not work out, thanks to my good luck. For whatever reason, now I am pretty much sure that we will never be of each others, this is most probable condition. You can evaluate who is responsible for. I wish you all the best for your life in front of you. I have loved you, if you have good quality you must be indebted for that. To come out of this debt, learn diligently the art of living and lead a happy life. I never claim that my love is pure, traces of passion are there. I love every single being of this universe, that love is compassionate. You are also one of the beings, so my compassionate love will be always with you. May be we would have some relation in our past existences, that brought us together, but our Karmas were not similar so feelings could not resonate, may be some other life. If you have feelings for me and wants to go away from me, you are doing blinder mistake, life is not laboratory to do experiments. Always grateful&. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 03:48 PM
Dear Haribansa, Don't praise me more, I will start to think more than what I am. Be my good friend, point out my mistakes. No man, I am not 100, I am less than 30. I can't say I am that wise, but I have a lot of experience and I would also like to say experience is life. I only say wisdom to the knowledge that comes from experience because this wisdome have tendency to change the person. Wisdom is not the knowledge which comes from books, movies, listening etc, that is just a collection of information. this knowledge has almost no caliber to change the person. Appreciated man, thanks for your praise again. Buddha was enlightened at 35 and there were so many his disciples over 80 even over 100, age does not matter. Never think that, I am telling myself a wise person. I always explore myself, I know who I am, in conclution I am not wise. Dhananjaya |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 04:12 PM
Dear Dhananjaya, I saw the two G_I souls conversing in one rare late night. Then one of them vanished like Yeti of Shan-gri-la. So far I know Poonte might be helpful for making your love to come true and where to find her precisely. |
| Echoes | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 06:34 PM
To go back to bored2death's last posting, A friend (?) of mine and I were discussing how many sajha reader daju haru will keep their much younger wives away from Sajha.com until this thread disappears. ;) But I think it will be perfectly understandable, if bored2death-jyu now decides to go for an 18 years old! I guess she would then appreciate why men were always ahead in the game! ;) |
| SimpleGal | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 06:49 PM
Dhananjaya jyu! I must admit one thing----boy, can you write!!! :) Kudos to your stamina hajur! In peace. |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 07:15 PM
Echoes, coincidently my personal note to her is same as urs remark...ehehe |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 07:33 PM
I highly recommend to those aspirants of making love to read all posts by Dhananjaya here for the ART OF LOVE. I will be surprised why any gurl be it simple, smart, dumb, or inturrupted one want to miss him or to learn the art of love?? Those who miss will regret by missing him. But, that's not in immediate sight because she has already mentioned here: ".......The more I climbed up the stairs while reading your post...the greater peace I found w/i my soul! :-) Thank you :-)! ....." "...I closed my eyes and pictured the word husband in my mind...things that surfaced were: My life, father to my unborn :-) children, my heart, my best friend...!" Dhananjaya, you are pleasantly under survellance! ahem ahem...brovo, i'm proud of you and best wishes! |
| Poonte | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 10:28 PM
"20 barsa ko kta le pani 18 barsa ko kt taakne, 35 barsa ko budo le pani 18 barsa kai kt taakne, ra pheri umrika ma divorced bhayeko 40 barsa ko kta le pani Nepal ma gaye pachi tehi 18 barsa ko nai kt takne. Thus, the few kts that escape this "safety net" if you will, are by default, headed for the twilght zone, have to decide on an uncompatible partner or remain single!" aba, tyo 18 barsha ki KT ko perspective baata hai... 20 barsha ko le aankha laaunda: hansy bhaye dangai chha, natra tesko baje baandar jasto keta laai kolle lop garos? 35 barsha ko le aankha laaunda: padhai, sadhai sakera ramro kaam-saam chha bhane thikai chha, natra tyo adh-bainse budha laai herna laai aankha futya chha ki ke ho? 40 barsha ko divorcee le aankha launda: tannai gaanth bhaye, green card bhaye dangai chha, natra nakacharo tyo paataki budha ko aankha taat-tato rankeko jhir le jhosera fodi dinchhu! tesaile, aba tyo taruni lai ta ke ko tension? bichara keta harulai po tension...roop pani chhaina, degree pani chhaina, paisa pani chhaina bhane...gunto-sunto poko paarera Kaasi tira laage bho...baru sanyasai liye hunchha... |
| ru | Posted
on 30-Sep-03 11:06 PM
what is a compatible partner? and how do smart women construct their strategies to remain both "safe" and "happy" while also thriving on an atmosphere that further enhances their smartness? 1. reality is smart women, by definition, have to be smart enough to realise that although compatibility drives the wheel of parnership, it is safety--in the big glorious qualities that smart women often seek--wherein the shorter-span ends of the materialistic world lies. Hence, if they are really smart then they will construct a strategy that will enable them to get the most in the life. 2. By seeking discussion and advice on discussion boards as this one, how can smart women expect other smart women to tell them the secret to get compatible partners..in the premise of a zero-sum game of searching for a compatible "significant other". If the respondent indeed is a dumber female then by default smarter females are to reject their responses/advices. 3. Therefore unless smart males (assuming that the search is for heterogenous partners) attempt to seek 'disillusioned but yet smart' females through discussions such as this, which again assumes that such smart males are themselves disillusioned about the topic because otherwise they would not be without compatible partners themselves, it follows that the discursion is not result-oriented. 4.If both the questioning and the answering parties are disillusioned about the topic then, how would one expect correct responses anyway... 5. Taking for the first case where in the first such female and first such male match up then they can portray their experiences to the other people; however since it is not possible that they match up due to the arguements outlined above. 6. It is thus impossible that smart women match up with smart men entirely through discusisons such as this. |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 12:36 AM
I have live examples of 43 year divorced boy marrying a 21 year nepali gal online. So lopping 30 or 40 plus guy to a 18 yr gal isnt a big surprise. However, both parties should agree how they want to move for future. it depends on the situation depicted by Poonte. |
| khai_thachaina | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 09:27 AM
HELLO EVERYONE I THOUGHT BHUNTE JI WAS TALKING ABOUT "COMPATIBLE PARTNERS".WHERE DOES MARRIAGE COME FROM?B4 MARRIAGE ONLY U CHECK 4 COMPATIBILITY.KI HAJUR HARU LE MARRIAGE LAI COMPATIBILITY KO CONFIRMATORY TEST BANAUNU BHAKO HO?MAILE BUJHINA. |
| nepali_angel | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 09:34 AM
This question shouldn't even be asked in the first place. What's wrong in dating pizza guys? |
| rbaral | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 09:52 AM
Smartness will make a girl find a smart guy. If she doesn't find a smart one, her smartness is questionable. And, why would someone on earth think a pizza deliverer isn't a smart guy? Here's a cut 'n paste from Dictionary.com: smart ( P ) Pronunciation Key (smärt) adj. smart·er, smart·est Characterized by sharp quick thought; bright. See Synonyms at intelligent. Amusingly clever; witty: a smart quip; a lively, smart conversation. Impertinent; insolent: That's enough of your smart talk. Energetic or quick in movement: a smart pace. Canny and shrewd in dealings with others: a smart negotiator. Fashionable; elegant: a smart suit; a smart restaurant; the smart set. See Synonyms at fashionable. Of, relating to, or being a highly automated device, especially one that imitates human intelligence: smart missiles. Manufactured to regulate the amount of light transmitted in response to varying light conditions or to an electronic sensor or control unit: smart windows. New England & Southern U.S. Accomplished; talented: He's a right smart ball player. ----- Delivering pizza doesn't impair your smartness! |
| nepali_angel | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 10:01 AM
Right, but there was a show on fox once, and what they did was take a bunch of guys from various professions(construction workers, lawyers, doctors, etc) and made them take an IQ test. So what was amazing was that the career one chooses seems to correlate with one's IQ. Nobody looks only at a person's intellect to decide whether he/she is fit enough to be one's future mate. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 11:15 AM
Bhunte Ji, Thank you so much my friend. My heart says me that she always misses me. She knows how much do I want her and she knows I am not the one who can easily twist or change the feelings. I am unidirectional man, always walk straight. I am very much positive that Gurl_Interrupted should be my girl, many things are similar. She has given me big pain and I guess she suffered more than me. I did not have any clue how to move forward in love, may be this was the reason of our suffering. I just love her and expressed it. I think I am too straight forward that I missed to read her fillings. I always blame myself for mine as well as hers pains. I liked some girls before but never loved. I did not have any experience how to express love and what is the right time, this might be the main reason. I just loved and I am loving. I am responsible. One of my friends mastered Kiro (a great western palmist who is believed to learn palmistry from Indian Guru) and saw my palm. He said, I will fall in love and third person will be help to find her. I don't know whether I believe in palmistry or not. May be Sajha and Sajhites are being my help and palmistry going to be true for me. I am so shy by nature; I have never imagined that my love will be such a public matter. My heart tells she will be surveilling me; she will be eagerly waiting for my posts. I dont know when will my search end and she will be with me and I will carry on my study effectively. I dont know what she wants from me. I have surrendered myself, she run away. I know she is more shy than me, if she really loves, she will step forward one step for my every two steps towards her. Bhunte ji, thanks for all, I dont know what should I ask from Poonte Dai. Anyways, this much is great my friends. Dhananjaya |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 11:19 AM
SimpleGal Jyu, Thank you very much. Appreciated. Dhananjaya |
| lonely | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 12:27 PM
Dhananjaya So looks like you have the right target, only the reaction is to be seen. What is the conclusion of the discussion? always lonely, |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 12:48 PM
I don't know lonely, I have lost her so many times. May the time be in my favor and give me my lost love back. I am optimistic though. Dhananjaya |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 02:03 PM
Hi Dhananjaya jeu, Are you 100% sure, I am ur lost love? Coz life based on assumptions is very painful! Trust me on this one! Coz I doubt, I was the gurL u loved or u love becoz nobody everrrr loved me nor did I love anyone....Perhaps! I am prolly someone completely different than u think I am. I'm sorry, I am not meaning to be rude or trying to hurt u...coz I've been there time and again and know how it feels! That's the last thing I want to do to anyone knowingly! First, I decided to stay quiet coz I thought it wasn't me...coz in life there can be more than one interrupted_gurls!...& perhaps I just happened to be one of them! But then reading ur posts, I had to answer coz I didnot wanted to be the reason behind you wasting your precious life away! That is the last thing I want anyone to do for me! Uhm...I don't think I am the gurL u interrupted. Maybe! *sigh* Khuda Jane! I hope u will utilize ur time wisely & not waste any second trying to figure out if I am the gurL u loved! Coz at the end of the day, it's not if I am the one that will matter...how u lived ur life will matter. I know you are a wise individual...so much wiser than I am...and will make a right decison for you and your future! Wishing u the best in every step u take. ,G_I Something! Na ta roop cha...na ta dhan cha...na ta mann cha...don't have anything ur gurl must 've possessed. Whackiest gurl u'll ever meet! Don't wast ur time! p.s. one day u'll thank urself 4 not wasting ur time! Bye. Best wishes! |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 02:42 PM
Dear Dhananjaya, Your Palmist may be true. Somehow, knowingly or unknowingly 'afno ta purpuro ma testai lekhya jasto chha'....some sajha readers must me smiling with this assertion...lol If you believe on palmist, why not you verify with our Sajha Palmist nicked 'trikal' guru. I was just wishing the gurl whom you believed to have loved come here and say something. I'm bit cofused now, but don't give up. If your love for her is true, that will materialize conditonal on other factors. Ankhir ma euta pangra le rath chaldaina ni ta... Gurl_Inturrupted wrote: >>>>>Na ta roop cha...na ta dhan cha...na ta mann cha...don't have anything ur gurl must 've possessed. Whackiest gurl u'll ever meet! Don't wast ur time! <<<<< ahem ahem ...it reminds me reading 'nepali dantya katha' during my childhood. Let me recite it: Once upon a time, there was a King who had a beautiful and intelligent daughter......There was a Prince from another country who heard of King's daughter and dreamed and loved so much her........One day the Prince begged for her hand with the King, and a meeting schedule was arranged. But, the Princess wanted to test the Prince by making up to be ugliest one--by putting on ripped guniyo chola, applying charcoal powder on her face, kapal jingringa pareki...and so so... Tes pachhi ke bhayo maile birse....ehehehe |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 06:24 PM
Dear Interrupted Girl, Nice to hear from you. ...Are you 100% sure, I am ur lost love?<<< ------------ The day when i will be 100% sure that you are my lost love, I will stop posting on Sajha, I will directly come to you. I will beg for you from your father and I am sure he will be happy, I know him very well. ------------------------------ ..Coz life based on assumptions is very painful! --------------------- Gurl, who can know this fact more than me? ------------------------------------------ ......Trust me on this one! Coz I doubt, I was the gurL u loved or u love becoz nobody everrrr loved me nor did I love anyone....Perhaps! ------------------------- Never, I won't trust you anymore. You have made me fool many times misusing my straight forward nature. I don't lie and think same for all. I am already convinced that you do lie. i will not listen to you anymore, i will do whatever I want. I caught you red hand, here you said, nobody everrrr loved you, that is also a good lie. ------------------------------- ...I am prolly someone completely different than u think I am. ------------------- I have confidence on my luck. Consiously I have not done anything unwholesome, there is no question of getting wrong person. Its my Karma which brought be accross you and cause me to feel wormth from you. you won't love me if you are different than me, waves of different frequency never tuned up, they dies, this is law of nature. There are some people who are very quick to recognize the right things for them, may be, i should be one of them. -------------------------------- .......I'm sorry, I am not meaning to be rude or trying to hurt u...coz I've been there time and again and know how it feels! That's the last thing I want to do to anyone knowingly! First, I decided to stay quiet coz I thought it wasn't me...coz in life there can be more than one interrupted_gurls!...& perhaps I just happened to be one of them! But then reading ur posts, I had to answer coz I didnot wanted to be the reason behind you wasting your precious life away! That is the last thing I want anyone to do for me! --------------------------------- Firstly, this mind is not that weak to be hurt. Secondly, it's not mine nowadays, no problem, you can hurt, somebody else will cry. who hurt you might have cried more because one who hurts suffer more than one who get hurt. Don't worry about me and my life. My mind is like a cockroach which can adapt any situation. You know what, they will be only cockroach who survive after atomic war. My mind is pretty strong to withstand any result. Don't you feel so? My precious life will always remain precious rather it will be more precious after you come in. .....I am sorry I can not do your favor this time. --------------------------------- ..............Uhm...I don't think I am the gurL u interrupted. Maybe! *sigh* Khuda Jane! I hope u will utilize ur time wisely & not waste any second trying to figure out if I am the gurL u loved! Coz at the end of the day, it's not if I am the one that will matter...how u lived ur life will matter. I know you are a wise individual...so much wiser than I am...and will make a right decison for you and your future! ----------------------------------------- Khuda Jane?? Khuda Jane Ha. utilize time wisely? certainly. My wisdom says me to find my life and my life is you. Gurl, I have spent years missing you, you can never convince me now. Don't worry life is not smooth but it is not abnormal too and its not gonna be smooth until you come. Don't preech to a Premi who is looking for his lost love, that love who has become his life. He is dedicated to resolve the problem, won't listen to your sermon, sermon of sick heart. You said i am much wiser than you, if you truely believe that take Buddha's advice. He said PANDITANANCHHA SEVANA, always associate with wise person, SADHU DASSANANG ARIANANG: it is always pleasure to see wise people. SADHU ARIANANG SANGABASO YATI NANG BA SAMAGAMO, its pleasure to live with wiseones, like living with family. Take this advice and come to my life, if not you are just flattering me saying me a wise person. Dear Girl, Trust me, I am not making any mistake. I always follow the laws of nature, you are wise enough not to go against nature, this is the bottom line. If you would be problem for my life, I would not have influenced by you. cont............ |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 06:29 PM
------------------------------ ....Wishing u the best in every step u take. ------------------------------------ Thanks for the best wishes, actually my every steps are coming towards you, your wishes are gonna be helpful to reach me to you soon. ------------------------------------- ....Na ta roop cha...na ta dhan cha...na ta mann cha...don't have anything ur gurl must 've possessed. Whackiest gurl u'll ever meet! Don't wast ur time! p.s. one day u'll thank urself 4 not wasting ur time! Bye. Best wishes! ---------------------------------------- whhatever you are, you are lovely. I have every necessary things except you. Teri Yesi Ada Pe Sanam Hom ko To Pyar Aaya. Your not a single advice gonna work now Girl. I am 99.9999% sure that You are the one. I was living very solitary life, hardly 20 people would have known me, you made me famous. One who was shy to produce a single world Love even in solitaries is known by his love all over the world. This love has become an example. I am confident that you are mine but very small confusion of 0.0001%. Until this confusion get erased, we are best friends. By the way my best friend can you direct me how to read the text of column that you have posted with heading "if loving him was crime, I am guilty". I could not figure it out. I won't leave you. Thank you very much, ,Dhananjaya |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 06:56 PM
I wish my love for someone also become an OPEN BOOK for all! |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 07:09 PM
Oh my gosh! Nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, yeah nahi ho sakta! Veerrrrrrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuu bachaoooooo! *Hehe* Where is the highest building...somebody show me plz.! Gosh! I should admit u are funny! Serrriously! I am 100% sure u don't know me. Dhananjaya, for real, I am not the gurl u interrupted kay :'-(! Hajurr kasto nabujhne. Jhan wishes dida pani, ma tira aune wishes bhannu huncha! :'-(! Okiez come! Did my dad tell u, I have learned all kinds of taikwando!? Hm...love ley garera famous. KooL! Maile garera chahi haina hai...that's for sure! afu ta kahile famous hune bhanera parkhera basi rako chu! :=D! *Hehe* Oh gosh! Have u thought about writing scripts for nepali movies or even hindi movies? U write preety good! It will be good to see some sajhaites as faaaaaaymoos writers someday! And u mentioned the day u will be sure, u will beg me 4rm my baba and he will be very happy? I don't think so, becoz he wants me to stay with my family as long as I possibly can! Lololz! so that statement of urs is false! You said u have spent years missing me? Then u must have fallen in love with me when i was 8? Comeon silly! so I'm not the gurL! "Thanks for the best wishes, actually my every steps are coming towards you, your wishes are gonna be helpful to reach me to you soon. " Ooooh wieee scarrry! *Hehe* U are never going to find me out! Catch me if u can! *that was a good movie, init?* contd... |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 07:10 PM
"Gurl, who can know this fact more than me? " >>Duh! ofcourse me silly! ------------------------------------------ Never, I won't trust you anymore. You have made me fool many times misusing my straight forward nature. I don't lie and think same for all. I am already convinced that you do lie. i will not listen to you anymore, i will do whatever I want."------------------------------- That's what exactly I am telling u, don't trust me! I have made u fool? Okie, I'm hurt! I made a fool? No way :'-(! Ofcourse I do lie. No doubt about that! "There are some people who are very quick to recognize the right things for them, may be, i should be one of them." Or maybe ur antenna picked up a wrong signal! -------------------------------- "my life is you. Gurl, I have spent years missing you, you can never convince me now. Don't worry life is not smooth but it is not abnormal too and its not gonna be smooth until you come." God! that's a very strrrong statement! Scarrryyyyyyyyyyy! Bachaoooooooooooo! "You are wise enough not to go against nature, this is the bottom line." Fristly if I was wise, I wouldnot be here flaundering my time away! secondly, If I was wise enuff my name would be something else and not GurL_interrupted. ....Wishing u the best in every step u take. Your not a single advice gonna work now Girl. "you made me famous. One who was shy to produce a single world Love even in solitaries is known by his love all over the world. This love has become an example." I have made u famous? Ok stop joking! As I mentioned earlier, afu ta kaile famous hune bhanera parkhera basi rako chu...I made u famous? That's the funniest joke I ever heard! Which love? :=D! "I am confident that you are mine but very small confusion of 0.0001%. Until this confusion get erased, we are best friends." Do u know 0.001% is correct and ther other 99.9% is wrong! "By the way my best friend can you direct me how to read the text of column that you have posted with heading "if loving him was crime, I am guilty". I could not figure it out." Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh, noooooooooo, what if u fall 100% in lop with me reading it...then what? :=D *hehe* Lolololz! Did anyone tell u, I have 3 kids? If my husband finds that u are hitting on me, he might turn into a lion. Don't tell me I did not warn u! I learned to growL GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! from him! He is even strrrronger than Hitman! Watch out hai. Tesai arkako chori lai testo bhanna paidaina hai! Bhunte, I a not lying. What can I do...no one believes what I say! *sigh* I guess, it's 'bout time I take sanyas 4rm sajha! Esari yaha aunu bhanda ta chora chori haru ko luga nai dhuwera base huncha! 'least uni haru ko sar, ra miss haru ley "Oho kati safa luga" ta bhanlan! |
| yOuNgBlOoDz | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 09:45 PM
font face="Arial" size="+9"> ----basanti tumne mera naam pukara....-BASANTI MAIN AA RAHA HOUN.. MAIN AA RAHA HOUN BASANTI---- veeru aka YB |
| yOuNgBlOoDz | Posted
on 01-Oct-03 09:47 PM
-----basanti tumne mera naam pukara....-BASANTI MAIN AA RAHA HOUN.. MAIN AA RAHA HOUN BASANTI--- ---- veeru aka YB |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 07:35 AM
Sorry Interrupted Girl, You are really not the one whom I am looking for, I convinced, I am really sorry. She can not behave like you, I guess, she was serious girl. Now just flip the percentage other way around. I don't want to read your column anymore, I lost my faith. Don't feel that this has hurt me, I don't lie, I am not hurt at all. My message to you is don't get interrupted, live happy life, free from worries and tension as I live. Try your best to find one whom you love, if did not work out, never mind, come down to the earth and lead happy life as if nothing had happened before. Never think that these are my feelings, these are my understandings and I live this life, unperturbed life, happy life. Bye Dhananjaya Dear Bhunte Ji, Palmestry did not work. Thanks for the effort. Dhananjaya |
| czar | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 11:55 AM
"Brain science reveals what men are really thinking" LOS ANGELES, California (Reuters) -- It's the universal question on many women's lips. "What could he be thinking?" she shrieks, or sighs or sulks at her husband, boyfriend or son. What is it with men and cars? Why doesn't he notice how much housework needs to be done? Why does he need to keep a grip on the remote control? And the most bewildering one of all -- why won't he just talk to me?" http://www.cnn.com/2003/HEALTH/10/01/men.brain.reut/index.html Check this out ladies, perhaps some of the answers you seek may lie within the mysteries of the brain and differences thereof. |
| czar | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 12:41 PM
"Fristly if I was wise, I wouldnot be here flaundering my time away! secondly, If I was wise enuff my name would be something else and not GurL_interrupted." Madame Interruptus, Coitus or otherwise, with a heavy heart and due respect, I wish to register my protest at your cavalier treatment of all the esteemed sajha visitors by declaring that they are all nothing more than layabouts who are here to fritter their time away. In my case, of course, you would be absoloutely correct. But to tar all the others with the same brush seems to be grossly unfair. Might I even go so far so declare your singular action reeks of extreme prejudice? You accuse our mighty contributors of having nothing better to do than bandy about words and split hairs over the most arcane, you may say even irrelevant, matters that have not the capacity to alter the fortune of even the laziest of gadflies, let alone of our most distressed nation. Hot air, you huff ! Quite right, except, might I point out to the lady with laundry on her mind, that it seems most uncharitable of you dismiss weighty matters such as, for example, the air pressure in the tyres of Pushkar Shah's bicycle that is discussed here with such fervour. It may yet have extremely important consequences. Allow me to explain thus: Should the air pressure in his bicyble tires fall below a certain point, say 10 psi, it may well lead to a condition known as 'pun chut' in the vernacular. This could lead to the aforementioned globe traveller having to call Air Force1 to air lift him to the tip of the Antartic ice shelf itself, his next reputed destination. It is whispered among well placed sources that his nefarious plans call for collecting penguin feather from the gullible birds with his usual glib stories. [Sotto voce: the hat industry have given him a lucrative contract it is rumoured.] Given that Pushkar may soon denude the entire colony of their plumage, it may well set off a furore of international proportions with the sight of naked penguins carvotting off the Ross ice shelf in the newly warmed waters in the just dawning summer of the South Pole. (The secret removal on public TV of the scientist recently may be linked to this too, but not confirmed yet.) Anyhow, all those naked penguins means raising the ire of the Audubon Society, and as you know, messing with them has serious consequences. They have a lot more and even bigger guns than the NRA can muster. Surely the experience of the spotted owl and loggers rammed home that point Madame Interruptus ? Two things of import stand out here: first, as we do not have an extradition treaty with the South Pole, it will be exceedingly difficult to hustle back the offender to face charges, of obscene bird gestures among others. A related charge may well have to do with his claiming the mileage as part of his trip. Air Force 1 does have an exercise cycle and his propensity to lounge on such may technically qualify him to claim frequent flier miles etc. And that is another reeking can of worms entirely. Given the importance of all of these and other matters, I fail to understand your cavalier dismissal of all who come here. Perhaps the befuddled Doctor Luv himself might pen some verses to beseech you to change your opinion thus? With great hope, I remain, Yours Sincerely, Czar |
| john doe | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 02:03 PM
Nice work, Czar. Word is, the Puskar-bashers have taken it upon themselves to announce a week-long unilateral ceasefire in observance of the imminent festivities. If any untoward incident, either covert or overt, transpires during this period, the only person held accountable will be Puskar himself....well, okay, maybe the penguins too. Intelligence has it that Puskar and his army of defeathered penguins have been secretly procuring arms from the Republic of Bazookastan. Once hostilities resume, the rag-tag Anti-Puskar Posse might well discover that the tables have turned! As to who's been bankrolling Puskar and his winged soldiers, its anybody's guess, but the money trail uncovered so far seems to insinuate the involvement of Mr. Lance Armstrong, who, as we all know very well, feels very strongly about all things bicycle. JD |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 03:30 PM
Dear Dhananjaya, It is seemingly not working for you lately but my suggestion would be to remain hopeful. I admire your determination and honest love for her whoever she is. If she is still available, I pray to God that all forces be with you. What I found reading all the past posts by both of you, you were consistent and the Gurl is in some dilemma. So give some time for her to think. Meanwhile, p2p email may be productive. And, if anyone of you want to convey your true message, i can do that (though i understand the familiar nepali vernacular that "ramro bhayema merai bhagge ma thiyo ra po, ani naramro bhayema tainle garda ta ho ni"). I am a hard negotiator and when it comes to the point of marriage it is no more than just lists of compromises. So my suggestion for both of you is not to take any irreversible decision. Gurl: Baini Guna Kumari, yo jamana ma bhane jasto keta keti pauna garo chha bhanne timi le janekai hola. Yeso tyo Rainla ko raichha bhanera bujhema kehi bigridaina ni. Poonte le pani email pathauna try garya thiyo re, tara bounce bhayo re. Keto asal chha bhane ra timi lai man paryo bhane ke bho ra. hami chhandai chhum kyare timi lai pithyun ma bokera doli ma rakhna lai.... ahile lai yettikai ma... |
| Poonte | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 04:22 PM
"Gurl: Baini Guna Kumari, yo jamana ma bhane jasto keta keti pauna garo chha bhanne timi le janekai hola. Yeso tyo Rainla ko raichha bhanera bujhema kehi bigridaina ni. Poonte le pani email pathauna try garya thiyo re, tara bounce bhayo re. Keto asal chha bhane ra timi lai man paryo bhane ke bho ra. hami chhandai chhum kyare timi lai pithyun ma bokera doli ma rakhna lai.... ahile lai yettikai ma..." Kina chaarai tira baata chyapera ukus mukus bhai raa chha bhanera khas khas laagya ta...mula Bhunte le malai beech ma paardya raichha...ali bhayena hai testo garna ta! Teeto-teeto laagyo, sathi! :) Khaasai bhanam bhane, ma meli pyaali boini lai kina email garthe ra tyo dhukkure Dhananjaya ko kura uthauna? As far as I am concerned, unless honorable Dhananjaya jyu meant it as a joke, I think he was about to cross the line into harrassment! Jhandai Nepal baata hockey stick magauna laa thiyen maile ta...katai baini ko rakshya garna koi koi ko khutta bhaanchna ta parne hoina bhanera...ehehhe Inshallah! Meli pyaaali boini ta thuli bhayera kasti bujhaki bhai sakeki raichhe bhane...majjale politely samjhaidiye, ani feri jiskandai udai diyin kuro hawa ma... Boiniiiiiiiiii...tyo hockey stick Azarbaijan samma ta aai pugya thyo kyare...ahile tetai vacation manaundai gara bhandim? Ki super express hulaak maarfat jhattai jhikaune ho??? |
| SITARA | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 04:35 PM
Yikes!!! CZAR ji: Might I assume your pressure pump is rising higher than the "normal" zero (C) by 32 (F)??? Or is it falling to frigid? hehe! such trifles of time whiled away by the time keepers of the cycle peddlar or was he a peddlar? He seems no Simple Simon, that one. As for the naked penguins, flightless they may be but darned swift in the waters. Particularly, one, the Fairy Penguin known to be faithful for life to its "naked" spouse, unless /until eaten by the predators of the frigid waters. ;) |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 05:04 PM
Mola Matteko Poonte, hockey stick re? tyo bharuwa banduk nai jhikau na ta takat chha bhane....furti garnu pardaina la la koi pani daraundaina yeha...kyarnu ra afu duitai pachhe ko pariyo ra po....eheehh |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 06:05 PM
Dear Bhunte Ji, I am very much pleased how you helped me. Please don't take this as a big deal, this happens sometime. I have some feelings for a girl, who has left some remarks. Is this something unnatural? I don't think so. My story with her and Interrupted girls postings are coincidently similar. Sometime such synchronization is also obvious. I love this girl, she is like imaginary person. I am not like crazy lovers who miss their girls and become restless. I miss her but keep the balance of mind. Incidences like this are making my feelings feeble and feeble for her. Feelings are impermanent, that's why I dont' give importance to them and I dont' let them ruin myself, I have been giving the same message to Interrupted girl in my almost every postings. Whoever is she, if she is really interrupted she is miserable, she can live happy life. This is my message to one and all. Please never think that I am broken heart, read my every postings, they reveal art of living. Love is a gifted positivity of bleesed mind. One must learn to love, pure love and compassionate love. My love to that girl is not pure, traces of passion are there, I have mentioned this in my previous postings. Thanking you, Dhananjaya. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 06:29 PM
Poonte Ji, I am kind of different person. I appreciate your feelings. Never use the word honorable for me Punte ji. This was not jock, this was real life. I never do anything for fun, this seems like a jock but this happened in real life of a real person. You don't know me, but I am not the one who wants to hurt others, Please forgive me if I have hurt you unknowingly. i love everybody and want to see everybodies welfare. I appreciate your sense of humer. Regarding your sister Girl Interrupted, ask her to change her name and be mentally strong. i have been giving this message to her in every postings. She is not the girl whom I have loved but she is my best friend, I am man of words. You don't need to do anythig for the protection form your your sister from me, I am a harmless being. She is respected for me. Punte Ji, I am always happy person, ups and downs of life can hardly influence me. Please never think that this incident was a jock of my crocked mind, rather it was fruit of my defiled mind. Sorry for mistakes. Thankaing you Dhananjaya |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 06:59 PM
Sire Czar, When I posted the statement that have undergone through a very heavy analysis & re-analysis by you sire, I had no intentions whatsoever to treat "all esteemed sajha visitors" so cavalierly like "nothing more than layabouts who are here to fritter their time away." Sire, I respect your views and I am always open to constructive criticism. And thank you for that. But, never in my dream or anywhere in my mind had I tarred "all the others with the same brush," as I have tarred myself in one of my posts. When I stated the above statement, I was speaking only for me sire! How dare I, generalize the whole sajhaite population...whole world based upon my interrupted life? Nah, that would be foolish of me. My apologies to everyone who must have interpreted like our sire did! I had no intentions what so ever & it's a genuine statement! Peace! Yours sincerely, G_I! |
| GurL_Interrupted | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 07:05 PM
Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrru! :-)! Pooo dai, :'-(! Taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaada janchu mata :'-(! *sniff* *sob sob* :'-(! Happy bhai tika :-)! Mero dai thuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuLo manche banun...mero dai ko naam sansar bhari failiyos :-)! Bhunte, Dhananjaya and everyone, U guys have no aaaaaaaaaaideeeeeeeeeea, my eyes r getting blind seeing the name GurL_Interrupted sooooooooooooooo many times :'-( *snifflez* Can you plz. close my case :'-(? Coz, everytime I see my name, "GurL_Interrupted," it leaves me more interrupted than everrrrr :'-(. So, plz. leave it in solitude for a while or for everrrr! That would be grrrrrrrrrrrrreat! Thanks for everything everyone! |
| Lalupate*Joban | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 07:40 PM
Boy, the diversity of this thread rocks! Big-time. Czar, your comments are mighty entertaining. Masterful prose - arguably the most refreshing stuff I have encountered in my cameos at this website. Glory to thee! THE DHANANJAYA SAGA: Intense. Drama, high drama. Eiither "Deewanagee" stuff... (Yes, I mean that Ajay-Urmi-Akshaye starrer. Those who liked "Darr" but have not yet watched this adaptation of "Primal Fear" are strongly advised to watch it for Ajay's power-packed performance. Akshaye does not disappoint either.) ...or Jerry Springer stuff. I am inclined to vote in favor of the former. As a staunch believer in unconditional and no-holds-barred love, I am impressed by the sheer intensity and persistence of Dhananjay's faith in love. The only caveat - why pour all that intensity on some online persona on the basis of sheer intuition that she is INDEED the long-lost Paro?!?! Let's not give intensity a bad name, yaar. We, the Majnus of the world, ought to internalize the simple idea that rationality and intensity of feelings are not necessarily mutually exclusive kyaa! :) THE ORIGINAL QUESTION: I doubt the validity of the assertion that underpins the question. Smart, taruni Nepali women are in high demand, I would think. Now, wouldn't that mean that they should be in a position to take their pick from the biiiiiiiiiiiiig set of eligible bachelors? Being in a position to choose from many should increase the probability of finding a compatible partner, right? Unless one starts with a premise that Nepali men, as a whole, are just an incompatible species! And that, ma'am, would be one hell of a false premise. [Note: "Taruni" here is used in the broad sense of the word; my ad hoc specification of the age-boundary between tarunis and post-tarunis in the context of Nepali women: 27 years.] That said, now, if a single Nepali woman is smart but not a taruni any more, that might be a different scenario...but then there are still Sher Bahadurs for the Arjoos of the world! |
| Arnico | Posted
on 02-Oct-03 08:46 PM
This thread is getting hillarious! |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 03-Oct-03 06:02 PM
Dear Pal, Today is friday, more time to be with friends, to share something with friends, to dive little deeper and deeper. I read the posting of czer Ji, great informative article. Wow wonderful article. This is a well established fact of biomedical science that every emotion brings some biochemical change in brain and vice a versa. Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) technology made this possible to see the changing activities in the cingulate gyrus. MRI with Nano technology is coming up shortly which will be able to see very subtle change in brain, it will be able to scan each and every layer of brain, will be able to see the secreted chemical due to emotions. I have two questions, Will technology be able to regulate the chemical? If so, we can regulate our emotion, thats great! What will be face of the world then, wont that be a brain cloning? Buddha, a super scientist of mind did not allowed woman to be nun. His step mother Gautami requested him a lot, he rejected. Old woman, over 100 walk from Kapilbastu to Vaisali, more than two week journey and cried. Ananad, Buddhas secretary saw it and compelled Buddha to take woman in order, to open the door of liberation for women also. Buddha agreed but he gave eight conditions, all of these conditions were against Gautami, like one of them was, every nun has to bow down to even a newly ordained monk. All the nuns have been following these eight conditions still now. Then Gautami accepted all these conditions and she became first nun of Buddhas order. She got enlightened in no time. But Buddha was not happy with his discussion. Questions, 1. What makes Buddha not to take women in the order? 2. Why did he discriminate man and woman? 3. Liberation from Dukkha, Mukti is the last thing to achieve by every being, why Buddha want to teach only to men? 4. why Buddha did not want woman to libereate? 5. If they dont practice Vipassana, certainly they wont liberate, will they never get liberated from the existence? Are they bound to take rebirth (please never mind, according to Buddhas teaching)? 6. Dont they have caliber to get enlightened? The answer is no, they do have caliber, hundreds of thousand of them got enlightened afterward. This has to do something with differentiation between man and woman mind. I can answer all these questions, some of them are facts (that I have experience) for me and some of them are theory (that I have not experience), I hardly talk about the theories eventhough they are widely accepted and proved. Not only this much, Buddha said to Anand that Anand you did mistake, the teaching would have survived for 1000 years but it will disappeare after 500 years. Truly, pure teaching got disappeared after 500 years of Buddha. After getting enlightened, Anand realized his mistake and apologized form 500 enlightened monks. Certainly, there must be difference between women and mens mind. Moreover, among men as well as women every individual has different mind, this makes an individual. Facts are facts no matter when they are discovered and become known to mankind. Modern science has to explore a lot about mind, but it is noticed that Buddha had left nothing to discover in this field. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 03-Oct-03 06:15 PM
Dear Czar Ji, very excellent example, very much close to the reality, I dont think that Puskar need help of Air force1. My suggestion to him is not to cycle over the snow of Antarctica, thats not natural anyways. how about if Puskar Shah helped those necked penguins to put on cloths? Nah, natural gift is the greatest gift, I love that way. Penguins are predators for fishes but they are attractive animal and beloved of kids, how about if we ask Puskar to collect all penguins of South Pole and build a big aquarium for them and feed them something vegetarian. Nop, the fishes population will increase and hampers the ecosystem or the penguins wont be ready to stay inside aquarium for the first place. They love nature and will be ready to be there. May be they love that way and it suits them though it seems adverse to us. Tsar Ji, I dont think that South Pole is occupied and you need special visa to enter there, its like a moon everyone can go there whoever has rocket. I think we have to take machine gun if they just have gun, we can ask help form USA, I am sure Bush will certainly help us because that will be a war between civilized (us) and uncivilized (naked penguins), Bush always backs the civilized peoples. Plus, US inspect South as well as North both poles. Ive heard that it gonna make damping site of nuclear waste. That will also not work because there are no infrastructures in south pole to drop cluster Bomb or Cruise Missiles, so Bush will be left with only one alternative atomic bomb, that will kill all the penguins as well as Puskar Shah no doubt but it will raise the temperature of south pole about 500 degreee C. All snow will melt and ocean level will rise, this will sweep away all the costal cities. If they win, we die if we win we die. So, enmity is worst thing, lets accept them as a family of ecosystem. We should learn to love even those naked that help us. Who are we? we are just different structure of flash and blood as the naked penguins. What makes us different from them is love and compassion, thats they lack of, they also do have enmity, and they fight for food and for different reasons. I loved so much your last sentence. I am positive befuddled Doctor is like John Nash of Beautiful Mind, poor confused guy, even if he is a professional healer, he is victim of his defiled mind this time. Trust me, I never lie. |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 03-Oct-03 06:37 PM
Dear Sitara Ji, Sitara Ji, Sorry for late reply but I was appreciating your answer to Tsar Ji. Since you are Zenist, hope won't get angry for my mistakes. Time is a great healer, very wonderful one. I have seen one movie, the sons room , sometime healers get sick and if the disease is communicable, it makes many people sick but a good healer heals himself first then heals other, he wont let anyone die though. I don't think that he is capable to peddal the cycle of time. At your last remark I remember a similar story. I remember a story, the very Big Philosopher in Greek, named Sacratus, who used to teach truth. Many people did not understand and went against him. They demanded his death and the king agreed. He was given very dangerous poison known as Hemlak. One of his students was a lawyer, and said that he could save him if he lied. You know what Secratus said, If I die and there is rebirth, I will be rewarded for truth, if there is no rebirth everything will end after the death, life has no meaning, what will I do living few more days. There is another story, Dhurba set for Jungle in search of Narayan. He was a small child so scared with dangerous lions and other harmful animals. Again he thought, if some dangerous animal kills me I will see Narayan inside him. He was a child so he thought if tiger eat him he will go inside the tiger and see the Narayan because he had heard Narayan is inside of every beings. This is just a pauranic fake story but good analogy of the fact you said. Thanks to you as well as Czar ji, Dhananjaya |
| Bhunte | Posted
on 04-Oct-03 04:22 AM
Gurl_Inturrptd ji, want to see u happy per your wishes...feri feri doman ko kura garera almal ma naparnu ni la... |
| DHANANJAYA | Posted
on 05-Oct-03 09:27 PM
Dear Lalupate Jovan, <<<< The only caveat - why pour all that intensity on some online persona on the basis of sheer intuition that she is INDEED the long-lost Paro?!?! Highly thoughtful. Highly apprecaible. Thanks Dhananjaya |
| u_day | Posted
on 06-Oct-03 09:00 AM
whaazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzupppppppppppppppppp |
| bhandafor | Posted
on 06-Oct-03 11:19 AM
there is a very limited firmament!!! |
| VISHONTAR | Posted
on 07-Oct-03 06:34 PM
Hey Dhananjaya, Do you realize you fall down dude, you fall down once again. Get up soon, hold the right track and move forward with double enthusiasm. I am sure that was the real life drama, like The Truman Show , wonderful direction of your defiled mind. One thing is appreciable though, you did not hesitate to expose your weakness to the entire world. Now-a-days, scientists are doing research with monkeys to learn about the original human nature. Its because, human beings hesitate to expose their weak part and act artificially. You seem honest; would you let me find the place where the research is going on? I am kidding, never mind. One of the highly influential personalities of my life, Gandhi, has exposed his many weaknesses in his book My experiment with truth . I would like to let you know some of them. - Gandhis beloved father was about to die. He was lying down on Gandhis arm at the late night, and then his (Gandhis) uncle came. Gandhi wrote, he felt so happy thinking that his uncle would look after his dying father and he would go to make love with his pregnant wife (his wife was pregnant at that time). He did! and could not see the last breath of his father. That one was very shameful of him, he expressed. - He wrote how coward he was before South Africa retreat; he could not come out of his bedroom without Kastur Ba, at late night, out of fear. He said Ba was bold. - He did not hesitate to write about being ready for sexual misconduct in England, someone, his friend, abstained him to commit. - He boldly expressed his angry nature and misbehavior with Kastur Ba. How he behaved with Ba in South Africa one day, very few husbands would behave like that. Many other weaknesses Gandhi had. One who expose his/hers weakness gets one benefit if he/she is wise. He/she remains aware that people dont have his/hers beautiful image in their mind, this helps him/her not to pride, not to think something special about himself/herself, not to give important to oneself. This help to reduce ego and lighten the load. This does not mean that one should advertise ones weaknesses, but one should not hide them for pride. Buddha said, it is best not to talk anything except Dharma, I dont know how feasible it is for householders like us and how possible it is for imperfects like us. Not hiding the weak points is beginning of the simplicity. Its very difficult to be simple. Buddha used word Uju (Rizu in Shanskrit) for simplicity, he did not satisfied only with Uju, so he said Suju (su+uju=so+simple), that word is still in use in our language as Sojho, means so simple. The practice of simplicity is still seen in different version of Buddhas teaching. Simplicity is the one of the seven elements of the Zen Buddhism. Zen, in their art and poems express simplicity with a symbol of a child, it means, the one who realized the truth left all the pride and reputation and became humble like a child. Not that easy but practice will make us perfect one day. Ups and downs of life are there, always hold the rope of truth, and never leave it. Regarding the girl you are missing from years, I dont think that she exists anymore. Even if she exists physically, mentally she must have become different person. You know how changing the feelings are, they are so ephemeral, never believe them. Even if you find her, you will be unmindful being blind in her passionate love. Passionate love is generated from greed; it invites cravings and attachments and eventually begets anger resulting great misery. All results are the product of the mental garbage (attachments, cravings, passions, greed etc), clean up the mind and move ahead in the absolute path of reality. Accept all the positive and negative aspects of life, try not to react (I know, its not that easy), and move ahead dude! I encourage you to read my postings on the thread theorizing life , I have mentioned there that what you have to get, you will get and what not, you wont, and nothing is in your hand. You will harvest what you have planted. Plant sugarcane now to harvest sugarcane in future, thats the law of nature. Every seeds planted in the fertile soil will give fruits, plant one seed and get tens, hundreds, thousands fruits, this is law of nature. Fruit always comes being multipled. Trust on your deeds, if your deeds are good, you will find simple, humble and wise girl to have happy life, but if your deeds are best you will find no girl and find opportunity to walk continuously in the path of Dhamma to set yourself free from misery. Good luck! My advice to you is to be strong, weaknesses are there, fighting with weaknesses is never ending job, we will get defeated, but fighting will continue, analyze yourself, are you become stronger after every defeat or not. This is the way how war is fought with mental defilements. True friend, Vishontar |