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| porcelina |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 04:08 AM
i decided to start this thread after reading the many responses to the other one relating to jharana bajrachrya/. i must say that i thoroughly admire jharana's guts.
in the other thread, i saw much resentment towards mr bijay kumar, but dont you think he was merely doing his job? i think he actually gave her more exposure by interviewing her. it was interesting to see both of their reactions; jharana representing herself (and so many of the middle class family girls, who just want to be more fashion consious like the rest of their counterparts around the world,)
and bijay kumar representing so many of the middleaged people watching the interview with the same kind of reactions that he had, mirroring upon their faces.
it just shows that many nepali girls are slowly not scared to show that they actually have a personality.
shreesha karkis suicide was a very sad thing, but if only she had had the correct support to face the media like jharana did, it would have been so much better for her. so what if you show flesh? so what if you wear revealing clothes? does it make you a slut if you are merely aware of your sexuality? and even if it does so what? as my mother love saying, 'kasko bau ko ke vitamin (taaagat?)'
what is it with our obsession with our clothes? whats the big deal about being modern?? why does the same society that applauds when a young girl wear a sari showing her bare midriff have to create such a big deal when the same girl just wears a t-shirt showing some midriff?? if it looks good on you, whats the big deal about wearing it?
whats the big deal about having some boys as your friends? why the taboo about sex? i understand that that is our culture, the way our society has been brought up, but we live in the fricking 21st century. we live in bungalows, we have cars, a big tv, we dont hesitate copying these things from other cultures, so why make a big deal about some girl who's trying to make something out of her life? probably tommorow, its going to be this same media, these same people feeling proud that atleast one more nepali made it big internationally, as a celebrity.
where i'm living right now, i feel happy when i see aishwaryas pictures in the ad's, surrounded by many white people. why couldn;t we have an aishwarya of our own??
why sit around and applaud our neighbour india's achievements, when we have so many beautiful nepali girls that could make it big?
i just wish more girls had jharana's guts.
signing off,
porcelina
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| dautari |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 02:41 PM
Attagirl, porcelina. That's the spirit.
As for jharana, I had personally met her only once .. just after she had won the Miss World-Nepal crown ... and frankly, I did not think she would come so far. And I have not watched any Nepali films that she has worked in - primarily because all of those films flopped badly. However, her interview was great. She was shining through it. I never thought I would ever admire Jharana ... and I now have surprised myself because I cannot help but admire the way Jharana handled the interview. Vijay Kumar Pandey must have thought he'd eat her alive .. but she turned the tables on him.
Does anyone remember when Vijay Kumar had interviewed Amshumala Shahi a long time ago? She had also stood up to him. And she ended up roping him in as her husband.
It makes me think of the 2001 novel "Antyaheen Antya" and its author Shobha Bhattarai who was telling her own story. It was really bold of her to come out and talk about her mismarriage.
Women like Jharana Bajracharya and Shobha Bhattarai represent the new breed of women in Nepal .. gutsy, intelligent ... and with a no-nonsense attitude.
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| L-a-x |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 02:54 PM
dautari,
good points.
BTW, where can you get the novel "Antyaheen Antya" ..I have never heard of it...anyone in sajha(US) have this???
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| dautari |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 03:00 PM
I didn't bring it with me here in USA; otherwise I would have sent it to you.
BTW, let me clarify myself. Antyaheen Antya is not a literary classic. It's like something written by you, me or anyone else - not a real literary work. What sets it aside is - the content - and knowing that it's all true. It's about a woman who is forced into marriage to a guy-in-Canada by her family and then she goes on to discover that something is not right about her husband and that she has been deceived big time. I don't want to give away the plot .. although it's plot had been much talked about back then. I just thought you would enjoy the novel if you did not know about the main plot... in case you manage to get hold of the novel yourself.
I wish I could be of more help to you. I apologise for not being able to help you in acquiring a copy of the novel.
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| ru |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 04:38 PM
to all dynamic people out here in sajha:
...don't you think abrupt change is more likely to have a detrimental effect. not that I am advocating the budha paka's prerogative to associate every novel change with "kali yug ness", but if stability means anything then I believe that the gradual change and not sudden acceleration is the key...hence should the question not be centered around the optimal velocity of change...
my 2 paisa.
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| dautari |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 07:30 PM
ru,
do you think jharana bajracharya's interview was an abrupt change? I don't think so. I know a lot of girls who are as broadminded as jharana was in her interview.
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| confused |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 09:02 PM
proceelina u are exactly right..i was also having a disscussion with my mom abt Shirsha karki and her sucide...she sudnt have done it..and sud have faced the media...like jharana..
you are correct...we need women like jharana in nepal..
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| ru |
Posted
on 04-Nov-03 11:32 PM
dautari,
While accepting your argument, please allow me to emphasize that kathmandu and a few urban areas do not cosntitute the whole population..to think about it, that is one aspect that we often forget in our calculations.
In any case, I was concentrating on our general attitude of comparign and emulating overselves to western standards. As far as the incident that you mention, I guess it is an unfortunate price for transition.
awaiting on further comments.
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| dautari |
Posted
on 05-Nov-03 10:25 AM
Ru,
concentrating on your urban vs rural areas arguments, don't you think that some rural communities in our country are more liberal towards women than even the urban communities? Most of the "matwali" communities give more freedom to women than "tagadhari" communities or "bahun-chhettris". On the other hand, it is true that in some other communties like in the most of the terai region, women are much more oppressed than those in the city. It's impossible to make uniform changes across a country as diverse as ours.
If we look at the tradition, even our "vaidik" tradition has something called "swayamvara" which means that a woman has the rights to choose her husband - not the other way round. During the vaidik times, the grooms had to prove themselves fit to be approved by the brides. And in the vaidik philosophy the supreme being is "shakti" - a female. It's only in the times of the "puranas" that the "importance" shifted to the men.
And, like I said before, this is the first time ever in my life that I have ever admired Jharana Bajracharya. I never thought she had it in her.
As for the incident that you mentioned I am not sure whether you are referring to Jharana Bajracharya interview or Shobha Bhattarai novel?
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| dautari |
Posted
on 05-Nov-03 10:35 AM
Confused,
the difference between shrisha and jharana was the social/educational background. Shrisha was not as educated as Jharana. And she probably did not have enough support from her family. Her suicide was a terrible incident.
Many movie insiders say that she did in fact opt for the casting couch. And the most of the nepali actresses whe was physically abused - most of the times with her consent. I never met Shrisha personally even when I was close to the film industry. So, I cannot say what kind of a person she was in real life. In reel life, she was a lousy actress. She could not act - period. And the casting couch was her only ticket to film roles - for which she had to pay a price she had not bargained for.
A lot of actresses in the film industry are "badnaam" for their so-called "loose character". (I don't want to name them.) Other actresses also have question marks on their lifestyle but some actresses are really "badnaam". Shreesha was one of them. And, as the saying goes, there is no smoke without a fire.
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| ru |
Posted
on 05-Nov-03 12:23 PM
Dautari,
I am not disagreeing to much of what you say in your last posting..I guess we are evaluating differrent facets of social liberalization...one point though, notwithstanding the diversity of our country, I still maintain that the kind of changes and their pace has to somehow translate in closing the gap between the urban and the rural areas...for most parts these changes are inbuilt in norms, which in turn is determined by socio-economic factors, among others. It is those factors that we can/should address as they are the only regulatory factors, others I guess is beyond the control of a democratic society. Incidents such as the suicide of the nepali attress (the one that I was referring to) are unfortunate costs of transtition.
On the other hand side, forces such as the feminist movements are also crucial in determining the direction and the pace of such changes. Here, I would like to postpone my applause for the female role models [note the pun] until they actually strive to motivate the underlying causes of "conservatism" in rural parts of the country as well as strengthening their [models'] position in the society as they stand. Notably, it is more often than not that such pledges (the former) are glorified pieces of their winning speeches. It is now time that they stand to their promises.
Please note that I am not implying that these models should bear the brunt of our diversity. However, all of us more priviledged ones , including these role models, have a moral responsibility towards the less priviledged. Thus, some part of our effort should be diverted into those areas from the time/energy that we spend on immitating and advocating for western standards.
Hope this makes sense. For other viewers, please accept my due apology for making this a too long piece to even follow with interest.
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| dautari |
Posted
on 05-Nov-03 07:45 PM
What you say is true, ru. However, I choose to differ a little bit and at the same time I also want to clarify that the motive behind my postings is not to persuade anyone to subscribe to my own point of view. I do tend to applaud those who show guts to stand up against the established norms of the society. I am applauding Jharana's performance in the interview ... not Jharana Bajracharya in totality.
Thanks, ru, for your insight.
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