| Nepe |
Posted
on 21-Dec-03 11:19 AM
Mitho nabolne-le maatra sunna paaiena mitho vachan bhanchhan
One of the best truism I ever heard !
The concluding couplet of your ghazal is a timeless and universal proverbial piece.
Maya-le maatra dhaandaina jivan bhanchhan
Another candid realism. And a shocking blow to the idealism of love.
Other couplets have more local and contemporary messages.
On a technical note, your couplets have followed all rules of ghazal except the rule of baher or 'metering'. In classical Urdu ghazal, baher is equivalent to 'chhanda'. However, it has now reduced to mere 'uniform length' in contemporary non-Urdu ghazal writing. So I would suggest to go for the uniform length to each line of all couplets unless you are writing what is called a freestyle ghazal.
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