| Username |
Post |
| Tuppi |
Posted
on 10-Jan-04 06:44 PM
"Kata hidnu bhayo bhauju?"
"Bazar tira. Sel roti pakaune tel ra chini kinnu hideki".
"Hamlai pani roti khwauni hoina ta?" Chive Charo (his name was Shiva) pwakka bolyo, as always.
Chive was a distant relative of Bhauju.I was just a neighbor.Chive and I used to hangout together in the village--making usual unsuccessful plans for getting laid.We were only 15 or so.I was one month older than him.
"Bhare aunus na sel khane man bhaye", Bhauju extended her generos invitation and left for bazaar.
"Aaja rati chi@ne bhayiyo jasto chha", Chive became as optimistic as always.Our (getting laid) plans always failed in the past.There was a reason behind the failure:we both wanted to do it together with the same girl. It was important for me to have Chive involved.Because, I was not as good at twisting conversation from 'sel roti' to 'khel roti' as he was. of course, I didn't want to be left out when he had fun. To do it on my own was difficult and also dangerous.If he didn't get the dough, he could tell the fulbutte story to everyone he met. By getting him involved,I could have laddus in both hands--use his twisting talent and keep his mouth shut.
It was Tihar time. Chive unfolded his perfect plan: "you come to my house after everybody in your family goes to bed.Take your chappal off so that you won't wake anyone up. Do not knock my door. Instead, pull the rope that will be hanging out of my window.I will tie the rope to my sirak, when you pull it, you will actually pull my sirak and I'll wake up.We'll go to her house and eat her sel roti. He..he..he". His plan sounded perfect this time.
I couldn't wait it to be night.After dinner, I got up and checked if anyone in my family was still up. With a pounding heart, I stepped out of my room like a thief.I had my payal chappals in my hand(as per his advice).I went to Cheve's window and pulled the rope as planned. In no time, he came out. And we headed to Bhauju's house in the dark.
"Tak...tak...tak" Chive knocked Bhauju's door.
By the way, I forgot to tell you about Bhauju.Her husband, a government employee, was transfered to Baglung a few months ago.She had a four-year old son.
We heard Bhauju's careful steps coming down the stairs.
"Yeti aber ke garna aunu bahyeko?"
"Hamlai sel roti khana bolaunu bhako hoina?"
"Kasai le dekhe bhane?"
Chive always told me that if a girl(or a woman) said "kasaile dekhe bhane", that meant "I'm ready, as long as nobody sees us".
Chive pushed the door and went inside.I also followed him.It was very dark inside.
"Mero chhora le thaha pauchha aba. Tapai haru le ke gareko yesto?"Bhauju tried to scare us.
"Suti sakyo hoina ra?" I asked.
"Uthyo bhane ni?"
We promised her that we would be careful enough not to wake him up.
"Bistarai, chhamdai aunus mathi".
We went upstairs."Roti khoi ta?"
She went to make sure that her son was not awake.
Grabbing that opportunity, I asked Chive to go first.
"Maile ta kahile pani Chi@e@o chhaina.Timi jau pahila" he wanted to send me first.
I wanted to go first too, but I had a fear inside-- if he dropped the idea of doing it, he could go around telling everyone that I had sex with her.You never know. I did not want to take a chance.If I sent him first, I would shut his mouth forever.
Bhauju came back saying that her son was asleep.According to our plan, Chive went first. I was there in the dark holding my breath.I had hard time controlling myself.
"Hee hee hee", Bhauju softly laughed once.I didn't know the reason then(But he told me later that it was because he came while looking for the hole).Only thing in my mind was Chive's return so that I could go.
"Mero ta aai halyo.Aba timro palo"he whispered in my ear.
"What? It has hardly been two minutes", I told him.But there was no point in wasting time.
"Mero chhora arko khat ma suteko chha", Bhauju warned me.
I already had my zipper down(by the way, I thought it was too risky to take the pants off.We might have to run, if the situation demanded).
"Yeta..yeta", Bhauju guided my l@#o to the right direction. I got into the mess he left behind.
Before I knew, I had already entered the heaven.
"Uh..uh...uh"
"Aama, kina karaunu bhako?" her son woke up.
.....to be continued.
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| Tuppi |
Posted
on 10-Jan-04 09:28 PM
"Jado bhayera kameko ni. Sut...sut", Bhauju lied to her son.
It was an amazing experience for us. I thanked Chive million times for his excellent plan. We started to crave for Bhauju's roti more and more everyday. We had already opened the accounts.Now, it was easy to carryout the daily transactions(not financial though).Going to her house became a routine soon. We were kind of worried that people might know about our regular visits. So, we decided (and promised each other) not to visit her any more.
The first night after we promised, I tried to control myself a lot.By 10:00 PM, I had already given up. I decided to go once more for the last time.Of course, I did not want Chive to know about this.I knocked on her door.It took her longer to open the door that night.I went upstair and started my daily ritual.Suddenly, I heard an unusual sound right above me.I asked her what that was, but she said that might be a rat or something.
We were in the middle floor of her house.There was a lisno (wooden ladder) right beside the bed.It was very dark inside.Her son was sleeping in the other room.
Things got worse when I farted loud.Something big fell upon the bed.I got scared to death.I shouted, but my face down on the pillow.When I got my breath back, I came to know that it was Chive that fell down from the lisno.He had already reached there and climbed up lisno when I got there so that I would not know that he was there.
We promised each other not to visit her ever again.
By this time, my dad had already suspected that I would go out in the night,but he did not know where. He wanted to let me know that he was aware of my visits.It was almost midnight when I got back to my house.There was some hay(paral) tied to my door.My dad must have done that, I thought.That night was really my last night for sel roti.
****The End****
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| nepali_angel |
Posted
on 10-Jan-04 09:50 PM
It was actually Al Gore who invented Roti. This guy is a genius.
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| Bahudaliya Panchayat |
Posted
on 11-Jan-04 06:31 AM
It's Great Upannyas!
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| KaLaNkIsThAn |
Posted
on 11-Jan-04 10:46 AM
First Nepali Erotica in Sajha? haha... cool!
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| Mega |
Posted
on 11-Jan-04 05:59 PM
nice job, tuppi.post some more exciting stories like this.i throughly enjoyed it.
by the way, is this a true story ?
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| oys_chill |
Posted
on 12-Jan-04 05:30 PM
Tuppi ..hope to read more. It was amazing narration.
Frankly, far more realistic and interesting than Samrat's stories :)
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| DeepBlue |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 09:25 AM
I agree with Oys_Chill. Tuppi's story is so live.You can feel the warmth of Parbati Bhauju ko roti yourself.Good job. Hope to read more.
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| Tuppi |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 09:46 AM
Hey guys, thanks for reading my piece.I decided to use some "%$&" words.It was only because I wanted to keep everything as original as possible.No intention to offend anyone.I will present another piece very soon.
Tuppi.
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| suva chintak |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 10:12 AM
Tuppi jyu,
Amazing, you turned out to be your own best literary critic! Yes, if you can substitute some of the more earthy choice of words to describe the pleasures of the flesh, I think you have a refreshing story. I am in agreement with oys-chill jyu; your plot resonates much more naturally with the hills and dales of Nepal than the guilt-ridden sexual angst that saturates Samrat's prose. I think most Nepalis have a much more pragmatic and healthy attitude to sexuality than the average US middle class person or Kathmandu's
bourgeoisie.
Good show, and keep it going!
SC, the occasional literary pundit
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| DP |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 10:55 AM
tuppi bro,
timro katha le ta hasayera maryo yaar.....timile sachchai khayeko ho roti when you were 15? you are khappis bro. bring another in.
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| thaag |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 12:29 PM
Tuppi ko katha ta Khatttara chha ne yaar...........
yo nai pahilo ra antim katha ho ki, yesto dheri katha garya chha??
Bhaye dekhi arko ne jaos na ta...
hami sunna utsuk bhayeka chhau..........
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| Nepe |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 01:12 PM
Our own Yudhir Thapa and Prakash Kovid !!!!!
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| Bhunte |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 01:56 PM
i was initially thinking Paru bhauju serving tea and sel roti in a typical kathmandu's wintry morning as in the pic below, but the story turned out different--mora chive ko hidden agenda arkai po raiichha ta ye ganthe ...by anysense the story doesn't represent nepal and its rural communities, however, such anecdotal evidences can be found anywhere.
It reminds me someone telling me a seemingly true story while i was working in a remote village of Nepal. In the story a villager sulks in a neighbor's "tharo" (a thatched semi-house semi barn) climbing "lisno" and performs sex with the lady acting as if he is her husband. Since it was midnite dark and the guy just whispers only, the lady couldnt notice that it was not her husband who she thought came back tired after irrigating rice farm in the night. kya besaram! anyway, tuppi has nicely carved the story.....
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| Bhunte |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 02:04 PM
sulks=slips
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| Tuppi |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 02:55 PM
I never called her "Paru Bhauju" in real life(always called her Parbati Bhauju). She would have been soooo happy, had I called her Paru Bhauju.I wish I knew that name when I was 15.
Another real life story featuring Meena Didi will be on soon.
Tuppi.
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| That's me |
Posted
on 13-Jan-04 03:06 PM
hey tuppi
u r so funny dude
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