| Username |
Post |
| zero gravity |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 09:38 AM
I Have Failed Them
As I write this
My mom sleeps lonely at night
In a stranger's home
Her new found profession of a nanny
How the kids remind her of her own
No more near
Walked away into their own lives
Leaving her nothing but memories
My poor 'mamu'
My dad sleeps lonely at night
Thinking of his wife, our mom
Restless nights
He could never adjust to the bustle of the city
It never felt his own
Especially with mom gone all of the weekdays
He had dreamt of happy retirement in his idyllic village
In mama's company
A quiet life, a quiet ending
Alas, here he is
Catapulted thousands of miles away
New York City
An illegal immigrant
A hard life
My poor 'baba'
I have failed them
They labored in their shop
Uncountable late nights
Unbearable Kathmandu heat
To send me to a good school and college in India
But what has become of me?
A cab driver
My education - down with the whiskeys
My english - only good to pick up customers
For whom I am no more than the 'buckle up your seat' nuisance
I know my parents hide their disappointment
They had imagined me a doctor
Had big plans for us all
But, here I am, trying to make it before the red lights
A bee in a yellow swarm
I have not provided my parents their happiness
I have not provided them their retirement dream
They say, "son, we are happy
With all the Nepali people, we like it here"
But I know them well, I can read their faces
The fake, nervous, wrinkled smile
The defeated expression
All too obvious, all too painful
I used to believe in hard work, perseverance
Used to believe in charting your own destiny
Now I realize
How circumstances, forces larger than our tiny lives
Shape our existence, our well-being
I feel entrapped, I feel powerless
But again
How weak it is of me to blame it all on the forces
My parents are living in an unreal world
I have failed them
The bottom line is rather simple
Why evade the truth?
As I drive down second avenue
Lights after lights
Streets after streets
Passengers after passengers
I just hope that I will not fail my own child
My one-year old
Making his first steps onto this world.
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| meera |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 12:50 PM
What a beautiful poem! Indeed no comparison.
Here's one for you:
You thought you had it all when you were a kid
You grow up and realize life wasn't what it seemed
You still have miles to go
Before you sleep!
Ok I admit I don't know where those words came from but to find happiness in small things is what life is all about. You don't have to get the Noble Prize to proclaim that you are happy. Teach your little one that!
Peace! Meera
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| IndisguiSe |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 02:42 PM
A wonderful piece of work.... really nice one... it touched meh... We all don't get what we want in life, but that doesn't mean we have failed ourselves or anyone else. If this makes any difference, in my eyes, you have not failed anyone. What matters is we tried... and in your case, you still have time.. after all tommorow is a different day :)
WIshing you luck.. IndisguiSe:)
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| GurL_Interrupted |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 02:59 PM
Very well written!
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| patale |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 03:12 PM
Your poem was incredibly touchy, very expressive and emotional. As someone has already indicated trying is the best, keep trying until you succeed., this poem is dedicated to you and all other hardworkers.
Today is your day remember that
Just do your best that is the fact
Strive to be the best
Be all that you can be
If you fail don’t worry that will just prepare you for next time
Life is a lesson that has to be taught, if you miss something don’t worry it may come back
Time is moving down
So make everything the best
Live life to the fullest. The lord is a caretaker he is your keeper
He will give you rest. He will help you, be your best.
Knowledge is a key that will open many doors
Use it wisely and the world will be yours
Remember your lessons and take it with you
For they will become lesson plans that will teach you.
Today is your day remember that
just do your best that is the fact
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 06:53 PM
Reach,
beyond the worried eyes,
what you see is only your own reflection.
Discard,
the slow, corrosive pain,
delve deeper than the wrinkles,
seek what seems hidden and yet so obvious.
Your family is all you have; family is all you(they) need!
Zero Gravity ji
You have more than many can boast of. Strangly, you were in my thoughts a couple of weeks ago, reminiscing your other beautiful poems.
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| Trikal |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 07:20 PM
Zero Gravity,
Nice poem.....
*************
In you the worlds arise
Like waves in the sea.
It is true!
You are awareness itself.
So free yourself
From the fever of the world
To see the joy of life
To see the silent wave
To see the creation of loom
To face the face of doom...
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| zero gravity |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 09:24 PM
Thanks all for the kind words. Different places, different contexts but there are many 'dukha ka kathaharu' - each one has his/her own - and it is best shared. In sharing, the world is revealed, we feel a little redeemed, lighter and hopeful.
Sitara, you make me proud.
ZGji
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| Bhrikuti |
Posted
on 31-Jan-04 09:28 PM
I believe that
just like for many others
ccircumstances often times
put me where I
Never plan to be
And make of me
What I never wish to be.
Situations often times
Compel my religious self
To question the very
Existence of God.
Yet when I delve further
Into myself,
I perceive
My blunders as edification
Failures, my strength
Realizing, reflecting and learning
My accomplishment,
Thus enabling me to move on
And map my divine providence.
Zero gravity, You put into words what a lot of people experience. You translate feelings into words very well.
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| tankahang |
Posted
on 01-Feb-04 01:29 AM
who the faaaak told you to go and be illegal wwent to good schoool did alll shit and got the best education and its not your parents you failed you failed yourself.your chpoiuce to come and be whatever now what the faaaaak you bitching about
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| czar |
Posted
on 01-Feb-04 07:49 AM
ZeroGravity: a sensitive portrayal of angst and the rocky road to redemption. Excellent !
Tankahang: Contrary to your high and mighty attitude, perfection is not as common as you would have us believe. People do fall off the wagon, and what we laud and support is the effort made to get back on the straight and narrow.
If your inability to grasp the nuances of writing prevent you from seeing the depth and beauty of his expressions, do spare us your crudity ?
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| czar |
Posted
on 01-Feb-04 09:55 AM
"I believe that
just like for many others
ccircumstances often times
put me where I
Never plan to be
And make of me
What I never wish to be."
Never were truer words spoken! You’ve captured the essence of the Vicissitudes of Life that lead people onto radically different paths than the ones they hoped and aimed for. How wrenching those course alterations can be, leaving unfulfilled dreams and longings in their wake.
Powerful are the currents that bear us to uncharted waters. The choices are to sink into apathy, tread water in resentment or clamber ashore onto unfamiliar territory and make out as best as we can, to build new dreams and foster new hope. Perhaps the occasional pause has us cast wistful glances to those far shores we hoped to conquer, but we sigh and resume our march upon the path we tread. C’est la vie!
A votre sante!
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| czar |
Posted
on 01-Feb-04 09:56 AM
My previous posting referred to Bhrikuti's poem.
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| tankahang |
Posted
on 01-Feb-04 02:40 PM
czar yeah you are right ..................... coool chilll
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| hansy420 |
Posted
on 02-Feb-04 11:54 AM
ya when everything goes wrong just blame it on diff cirsumstances...:-p
jk
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| oys_chill |
Posted
on 02-Feb-04 12:04 PM
zero gravity:
Poignant reality and I laud you for your honesty and portrayal of the bitter truth you have brought forward. All is not lost. Failure is only a perception! In life, you lose, you live, you learn!Experience is not what happens to you, but rather what you do with what happens to you.
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| Kale_Ko_Chartikala |
Posted
on 03-Feb-04 06:14 AM
Zero Gravity:
Hey... pal .... life is composed of various states .... consisting both failure and success ...just read what OYS says - "Failure is only a perception!"
Yes, "All is not lost.", NOT yet!
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| the other one |
Posted
on 03-Feb-04 08:12 AM
This is a great poem, the feeling of entrapment and displacement was very poignant and showing, one of the best ones I have read in Sajha, but why are people consoling/depricating the writer?, is he asking for any consolation? Folks, I dont know ZG in person,but as a poet, he could be writing by being in someone elses shoes, I think that makes it even a better poem, if someone can put themselves in others place(s), and outpour others feelings in a poem by not exactly experiencing.
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| LadyBug |
Posted
on 03-Feb-04 02:47 PM
You have failed no one coz failure is NOT trying. You have tried and you have perservered. You have been the survivor and you have been a hope. You are there. You are living. You are tangible and lovable to those who love you. You are who are you, and take pride in it for you might look at the less fortunate and repent your arrogance.
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 03-Feb-04 04:51 PM
the other one ji:
If Zero Gravity's poem evokes compassion and empathy, so be it. Thus, is the power of his words.
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