| Username |
Post |
| Rajesh |
Posted
on 25-Feb-02 05:13 PM
Why is it that when nepali people find out that you're going home for vaca. they want to come to get to know you, so they can make you their Bharia. Man people have no f@#*ing shame. One small item for present I can understand. But Shopping Bags full ? C'mon you've got to be kidding me. Worst is when you say No to them. Oh ma F@#*ing god, the Drama you have to deal with after that. Ooohhhh Hell!!! This whole thing sucks.... I just had to deal with a bunch of Sheeps who wouldn't take no for an answer. WHat is with these people ? I have never asked anyone to carry a sweater each for my entire family. We are not Bharia's going to Bangkok or Hongkong. WE ARE GOING HOME FOR VACATION NOT TO BE YOUR bHARIA..... GET IT PEOPLE.... GIT WITH THE PROGRAM.
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| Suresh |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 09:15 AM
Similar thing happened to me. But in Nepal. When People find out you are going to America all of a sudden strange people whom I had never met started knocking at my door, asking me to carry good for their sons and daughters. These are people I had never met. Because I was coming here for university my luggage was already full with the things I needed. When I turned these people away, they said I was being THULA BADHA. Why don't these people understand ? I agree with Rajesh that this particular aspect of Nepalipan definately sucks.
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| NK |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 09:31 AM
Rajesh,
Do you think you can take something for me since you are going to Nepal? It is just a small thing. I am sure it would fit it in your suitcase, a bigger one. A Bug. You know those tiny itsy bitsy volks wagon? I think my little sister would love to drive it around the town. I know you are pissed off because others are asking you more or less to be a bhariya. But this is different. Believe me, if you could do this favor, my sister might even allow you to drive while you are there. So?
Don't you love this board? Now I have somebody to take something for my family. Who else is going home? I have a few other things to send there. You understand I love my family
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| jira |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 09:38 AM
dude!
next time you guys travel to/from America, sutukka bhaagnu. Don let anybody know that you are traveling unless you have to.
- be aggressive and say NOPE
- don confirm your ticket a month ahead
- don be too excited and talk in huge crowd. somebody may be watching you and will start shopping right away
- don be so much into US, it is like Jhapa from kathmandu, a different place from where you are currently residing
- don hang around in Thamel too much buying all these nepali costumes
- don treat your friend heavily as if you are going to heaven
......aru yuastai yuastai dekhawuney kura nagarnu, I bet you will be traveling light.
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| sunakhari |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 09:43 AM
I once took some stuff for this person I hardly knew, it wasn't that tough, I had space but his father wanted to send 3 suits (yes suits) with me and thats where I drew the line.
A friend of mine was going back home, this Nepalese PROF wanted to send some stuff and you know what he was sending?? FOOD STUFF like crackers and jam and what not.
I think people have to wake up to the fact that PAISA MATRAI PAUDAINA NEPAL MA aru saab paucha. SO send money. Believe me your sisters/mothers/fathers/brothers will all be happier picking out their own stuff or even having that extra cash!!
To Those Who Have Been Victims of the Bhariya- Syndrome
NEXT TIME YOU LEAVE, TRY NOT TO BOAST TOO MUCH ABOUT YOUR VISIT HOME AND MAYBE YOU WILL BE LESS BURDENED!
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| krishna |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 10:29 AM
Hey, why not turn what could easily be a hassle into an economic incentive? If someone asks to have you deliver something to Nepal/USA, tell them that you would be happy to, as long as it's legal and they provide you with an offset credit to help cover your expenses incurred traveling. In other words, asking "what's it worth to you?" or "what's in it for me?" might help separate the serious requests from the rest.
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| Rajesh |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 02:24 PM
What would be the best solution to avoid such situation ? Any suggestions ? I will be taking another trip home pretty soon and I would like to avoid such incidents as much as possible.
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| NK |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 02:35 PM
Oh Rajesh, just grow up. You seem like a cry baby. Have you heard of a word - NO? How about saying just plain 'no' to those people who wants to burden you with their poko pantero.
If they still carry on or rag you, just politely ask them 'what part of NO you don't understand?' Or it could be, the problem might be you, yourself. Maybe you just cannot say NO. Learn quickly. It is an extremely useful word. Trust me.
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| Bharea |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 02:41 PM
Airlines has provided 2 laugage to visit USA. It is not like going somewhere. You have plenty of space do carry stuffs to and from Nepal.
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| krishna |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 03:07 PM
>Airlines has provided 2 laugage to visit USA.
> It is not like going somewhere. You have
>plenty of space do carry stuffs to and from
>Nepal.
I agree. Rajesh may well have plenty of space to carry whatever he chooses. Unless he is under some kind of obligation (and the fact that the person asking is Nepali does not automatically create said obligation), it's nobody else's business other than customs what he legally takes with him. Finally, if someone does not respect the fact that he does not want to act as their personal courier, then they are not showing that they care about him in the first place--and he shouldn't worry about what they think of him.
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| Rajesh |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 03:40 PM
Bharea !!
Maybe you don't mind carrying other people's stuff cause its your profession. But I do not want these hassles.
And NK
I don't think you understand. We are dealing with Nepalese people who do not comprehend NO MEANS NO. Even if you say no they keep going HAI BAHIHALCHANI. And it kept going back and forth for 20 mins. I don't need that aggravation before I leave. These are people I don't even know. I was ready to call the condo complex security to kick them out.
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| NoStringAttached |
Posted
on 28-Feb-02 06:31 PM
DA DA DA da damn!!! Ya'll got no dinky on ya twinky. Learn to say "NOOOOO". Anyways, this is the first time i have ever been here but these messages sucks big time ya'll. "In Rome do what the Romans do." So as soon as u cut ya weinny crap then u can freely say...How do u like 'em apples.
Take it easy guys!!!
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| Xena |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 09:15 AM
Hi
Heard what all of you had to say...but don't you understand....we all are nepalese after all. We have always been taught to be nice to one another, and the most important thing that we have learned is the family love and ties. Coming to US is itself a big thing. But everyone might not be as rich as you are rajesh as well as they may not have money to go back to nepal and come here...do you think they don';t like going to nepal as you do...of course you muct have a green cad that allows you to go back and forth from nepal to US anytime you want. But these nepali daju bhai and didi bhahini who are in US studying and working don't havwe such a luck...besides they ain't even sure if they can return id thry go back to visit their loving family and friends.
In such a huge circimstance, they still keep struggling here...and sometimes if they see anyone going to Nepal...of course they will ask you to take some thing for their parents..something that will show their parents how much they love them and miss them.
After all it's the internal feelings with which they ask you to take stuffs for their family...they feel that you also share the common problem...but seems like you don't...
It is in fact sad to hear what you al have to say about these coutesy requests from your own nepali daju bhai...wish you could be little more thoughful.
Xena
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| krishna |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 10:34 AM
x,
that's about the lamest attempt at a guilt trip i've ever heard. definitely the vinegar rather than honey approach. first off, your assertion that we're all "nepalese" after all is ludicrous; there are some "nepalis" here as well ;)... the person who started this thread OBVIOUSLY does not want to be someone's pack mule and was venting his frustration at the pressure he's feeling to serve as one. and then, as if he actually meant to reinforce his initial position, he went on (in a notably more calm tone) to solicit feedback on how to "avoid such incidents as much as possible." as to the final assertion about being "a little more thoughtful" of others' wishes...well, that's a two-way street. i, for one, respect rajesh's perogative to say no.
"I'll never be your beast of burden." ~The Rolling Stones
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| hmmm.... |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 10:54 AM
Nepalipan Sucks!! So Does Americanpan, Britishpan, Frenchpan, Gurungpan, Bahunpan, Newarpan, Indianpan, Pakistanipan......
We are Nepali and our social lives are more closer than the other groups-- while this brings us closes to each othter, its a setback sometimes. I see all these people with "superiority" complex. By letting down the Nepalipan, I applaud you "AMERIKANES" rising above the level. What an spledid job. Finally you have attained your AMERICANPAN. Muri Muri Bhadaai
Hoohi
hmmm....
Hamrika
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| mardanta |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 01:54 PM
Sure, when you were scrapping, you begged others to take some stuff of yours to your family back home. Your are well settled now, you don't want others to do the same to you. You are in a different league now - Oow!
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| KOKO |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 01:57 PM
Hhmmmm Hamrika ????!!!!!!
Wait a minute I am confused. You are telling us we have complex ? Just look at your name Pal. YES WE ARE RISING ABOVE THE LEVEL TO GIVE YOU A NEW TITTLE. Hypocrite. You live here drink here and shit here just like everyone else. But yet YOU WANT TO CONSIDER YOURSELF DIFFERENT. And what that name again(hypocrite) ? Now why would you call yourself that if you are soooooo in tune with your Nepalipan that you had to call yourself Hamrican.
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| - |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 02:07 PM
this thread gets more and more ridiculous by the minute. koko! way to go, man!
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| hmmm.... |
Posted
on 05-Mar-02 09:44 PM
KOKO-- Go Back to Japan or Africa whereever that is.
Hoohi (ooohi with H)
hmmm.... (that's my nick)
Hamrika (that's where I am located)
Haven't you ever read (H)Ashu's Posts? Its a derivation with H! Get it? If not I can't help you.
Hoohi
hmmm....
Hamrika
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| krishna |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 10:58 AM
>this thread gets more and more ridiculous by
>the minute. koko! way to go, man!
So true. Some folks just can't take "heck, no!" for an answer or accept the fact that all sajha.com visitors are not swadeshiharu.
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| xena |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 11:54 AM
hey are we all talking about being american like or not losing pura nepalipan?
thread seems to be more twisted......
just wanted to say nepali bhaye pachi nepali ko maarka ta bhujnu parne ho...
nepalipan sucks bhane u suck too.....
be american but don't forget where u come from...
xena
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| - |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 12:46 PM
>So true. Some folks just can't take "heck, no!" for an answer or accept the fact that all sajha.com visitors are not swadeshiharu. <
narrow narrow narrow-minded people.
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| kOKO |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 01:01 PM
Xena
where are you ? If you are in US then I have one suggestion for you.
WHEN IN ROME DO AS THE ROMANS DO. If you are stuck with your Nepalipan you will never advance. As Darwin suggested survival of the fittest, must be able adapt and adopt. If you want to keep your Neapli ways might as well go back to Nepal..why are you here ? If you do not like it here then you have no business being here. I am sick of this don't forget where you came from crap. Its only when people need something from me they use that line. Otherwise they don't give a damn. Yeah because you want me to carry all your crap you want me to be a Nepali. If I passed you on the street you would not even acknowledge me. PLEASE DO NOT USE THAT LINE FOR YOUR OWN BENEFIT.
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| - |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 01:17 PM
KOKO,
IF YOU WERE NOT IN A VIRTUAL LAND I WOULD HAVE WRINGED YOUR NECK RIGHT NOW. YOU SOUND SHRILLER AND SHRILLER EVERY PROGRESSING DAY. what is the matter with you.
can we block this person? Greal Balls of Fire!
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| Koko |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 01:32 PM
The truth hurts don't it ?
You can say whatever but fact is fact.
I am sick of people telling because I am Nepali I should do this and do that. And people only come and tell you when they need from you. Otherwise they don't care. Who are you anyway MR NAMELESS FACELESS. Are you scared I will find out. I could trace the source you know. Are trying to threaten me ?
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| Huri |
Posted
on 06-Mar-02 02:06 PM
Nepalipan sucks????? Owoooo it surely does like everyother "pan". It is very clear in this thread. Someone started off by asking for suggestions, but here people are heading towards completely different topics. People have started to names for each other, started to shout at each other.... and whatmore.. come on we want to see more of this sucky "Nepalipan."
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| Xena |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 09:33 AM
Dear KOKO,
What you are telling me is to go back because I still carry with me the values I was taught by my parents and family and friends in nepal. But I guess you should do that and learn some of the values that you seem to have forgotten completely. Yes of course, wherever we go we need to adapt and adopt values likewise in order to survive. But it doesn't tell that you forget everything about your past and build up new values. You come from nepal and it will never be erased from your life. ANd in many ways you do think like a nepali. As far as carrying my stuffs is concerned, if I'd come over and ask you would you say no. I can't because nepalipan sucks?
I think you wouldn't. You really can't say no...coz you are nepali and we know that being social and helping others is far more importnat then caring about our own happiness.
Another thing you pointed out was i wouldn't acknowledge you if i saw u in street....hey...you know what...I would...because in this US where everyone seems like an alien, seeing a nepali person would surely make me feel like i've met a person from my homeland...and say hi to you...that's me...I don't know about anyone else...and another thing is that....I wish you changed the way you see yourself and Nepali people....after all we are all family...
Xena
|
| Me |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 10:48 AM
Dear Xena,
I think I like you Xena.. well... at least what you post!!
I don't know much about all the different 'pans' and I don't believe in those kind of stuffs. To tell the truth I don't think I'd feel obliged to help someone just because they are Nepali. Of course it'd be easier getting to know a Nepali person and helping them out, but it's make me feel just as good to help out any other person of any other country or race. There is no such thing as Nepalipan, if there is then it's just humanity among Nepalis. If for someone Nepalipan sucks then for them humanity sucks! That of course doesn't mean you have to be a bharia to be a better human. We are better than other creations of God cause we know what helping others mean, we know what society means, but that doesn't necessarily mean you have to be a beast of burden. Live and let live!
Whoever
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| Koko |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 11:18 AM
Me & Xena !
Me,
I think you are misinterpreting the statement I made. I never said HMANITY sucks. I hate people that use Humanity as an excuse for personal gain. Same as people taking advantage of my nationality for their personal gain. Just because I am from a particular country does not obligate me to carry every Nepali's crap home. When I do reject them then they use that You Are Nepali line. I feel thats just an excuse because I wouldn't carry their crap. Its a free country and you can do whatever.
Xena,
My assumption is you're fairly new here. Well in due time you will understand what I am talking about. If you want to live here then better get used to the ways and means here(besides work and home who has any time for any thing Nepali?). But if you are going back one day then you can practice that culture and try and retain it so you will have an easier trasition when you go back.
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| Me |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 11:41 AM
Koko!
True! What you say, but there are people who, even if they could, would not help other Neplai just because they think others are trying to take advantage of them being a Nepali. It's not always so. Of course I am not denying there aren't people who tries to play with your conscience, saying you ought to do this and you ought to do that 'cause you have Nepali blood and stuff. There are, but not everyone is like that. So if I was going to Nepal and had extra space and someone asked me to take a small present home I'd do it, not a big shopping bag full of stuff though, and I think it's rude of anyone to ask someone else to take a big bag full of silly stuffs just because you are a Nepali. At least I'd not do it
Whoever
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| Xena |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 11:54 AM
Yes, I am new here but I have a strong believe that there is no religion and no person better than nepali. It'ds because they have a heart of gold. Yes, there are exceptions but most of the nepali people I know are always good and have a deep rooted humanity in them. Although you deny you too have a bit of humanity and that's what is nepalipan all about. I don't agree either that when people ask you to cary their big bags full of stuffs for their family you will say yes. Ofcourse you need to say no...I can't do it because I don't have much of a space. But there is always a nicer way to say things and the most important is that you should sya although I can't take the whole bunch of thing that you want me to take it with me, I can take something smaller for your family. I think that's the better way to show your nepalipan.
I do apolozise if you think i'm being too nepali, but still I love the way I'm because making others happy makes me smile. So liittle trouble for gaining blessings from others family and relief you get in your heart that you did something nicer makes things easier in life.
Lastly, thankx to "ME" for supporting my ideas
it's Xena as always
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| Me |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 01:30 PM
Xena! You know what! I really really do like you :O) Don't change, only weak willed person would let the world change what they believe in. It doesn't matter if you are new here or old here..whatever that means... the world can change you for the better or change you for the worst. How you want to be is in your hands. You don't have to be cold hearted to be successful. It doesn't matter where you are, good deeds are always good deeds. Some may appreciate what you do, others may criticize the very same thing, but you got to do what you beleive in, do what makes you smile.
Tara ke thaha cha? I don't believe there is no religion and no person better than Nepali.. well at least I didn't... but I like it that you beleive in it. It really is cool. No wonder you are such a pro Nepalipan person. So I guess Nepalipan is how one looks at it. I wish everyone would look at it the way you do.
"There's nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so". You think good! :O)
Me
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| Xena |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 01:37 PM
Me.....I really appreciate that you like what I said...I know that I'm new here and something that made me question was that could people from Nepal change so much?.It certainly is so sad to see people from our own land here taking bad about one another...and pretending to beAmericanised yet being much more rude than Americans. I wish people who came here could believe that we are not Americans . And there is always limit for changing oneself. Being nicer as we were in Nepal counts.....that's all I have to say..
l
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| GoruKoBau |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 02:35 PM
I wasn’t going to get into this fray but after reading KOKO’s asinine comments I must. Koko seems like someone who is totally frustrated with himself, who continuously tries to compete with the Americans, and seems to think that Americans are the ideals of all human beings. He seem to think that anything Americans dish out to him is gold and everything about “Nepalian” is crap.
If a Nepali person tells you to take something to Nepal for him, have enough courage to nicely say sorry I have my own stuff to take and that you can’t accommodate him. What if he thinks you are not being a “Nepalian” … unless YOU yourself feel that by not taking his stuff with you, you are not being a “Nepalian” and that bothers you. In that case professional help should be looked at.
You are very narrowly defining what it means to be a “Nepalian” … and simply put it’s dumb. Grow up … and stop thinking that you are right all the time and stop saying every body else’s ideas are crap… you are full of it yourself my man!!
You told Xena to go back to Nepal if she (assuming …) doesn’t believe in assimilation. When you are in Rome do like Romans, you might have said… When the Europeans came to the American continent … did they do as the Romans, in this case as native Indians … no … they maintained their European traditions and culture and to this day will kill and be killed for those values. You are a coward and spineless individual for wanting to abandon Nepali culture and completely assimilate into the American way of life.
Sir, if you don’t like Nepalipana then why do you bother visiting the Nepali discussion board…. You are a complete hypocrite aren’t you ??… you tell people to go back home if the don’t want to become “American” but yet why can’t you do the same … if you don’t like Nepalipana stop visiting these pages!
And visit a special page designed for someone like you …www.namakharam.com!
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| Koko |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 02:49 PM
Me & Xena,
Are you guys implicating that only people from Nepal are nice ? If that is the case then I would totally disagree with you. Nice peole are nice regardless of where they come from. You cannot generalize an entire population by meeting one person. eg. Regardless of how bad Nepali peole dislike Indians... Not all Indians are bad. The same way not all Nepali people are good either. We definately have quite a few rotten ones amongst ourselves. I do not agree with you folks on your statement that ALL NEPALI PEOPLE Are good.
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| Me |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 03:30 PM
Koko! I agree with you totally, and I don't know what gave you the idea that we said all Nepali are good. I am not implicating so. I never said that and I am sure Xena didn't mean that either. Xena probably hated you saying all the silly stuffs you did so you can't say that Xena thinks all the Nepali people are good :O). Jokes aside what I wanted to say was .. yes! There are bad people Nepali too, but being a Nepali deep down, I can't help but like Nepali people more than people from any other country. I see the way the things are now because I had Nepali friends and Nepali family showing me how the things are. I have been cheated and hurt by Nepali people too, but no matter what, for me Nepalis are the best. Expect for a few, most of the people who mean a lot to me are Nepali. Yes, we do have rotten ones among us too, but be positive.
Life is as good as you make it.
Me
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| kOKO |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 03:45 PM
GorukoBau ??
Are putting words in my mouth ? Did you hear me say American way is great ? Or even I am trying to compete with Americans ? Hey Goru !! where are you getting all this stuff. Its news to me that EVEN I MYSELF didn't even know about myself. READ THE CONTENTS BEFORE YOU START ASSUMING THINGS. I am just making general statements from my observations here.
Man you are totally taking things out of context here. When I said WHEN IN ROME DO AS THE ROMANS DO...... meaning if you want to get along with the peole here, make friends here, or earn a living here .... then you'd better get with the program here. If you keep with your Nepali ways, you are not going to achieve any of the above.
You're telling me to grow up ? Just look at your name GORU KO BAU ? Like an inbecile. Your reasoning is like a child crying to its parents. Talking about stooooopid unsubstanciated arguments ....why are you here then ?
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| Xena Nishika |
Posted
on 07-Mar-02 03:50 PM
Okay....It seems to me that things are getting a bit out of control here....I think it would be better if we stop discussing what's good and what's not. Things change with time...and we should hope for the betterment not the worse....good luck for those who sticks with nepalipan and to those who feel neplaipan sucks. Only God and time can tell us what's good and what's bad!...XENA
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