| Siddant |
Posted
on 01-May-02 03:22 PM
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she
doesn't need.
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets
a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A
successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A
successful woman is one who can find such a man.
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him
a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love
her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men, but
married men are a lot more willing to die.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change,
but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't
change,
and she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the
ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I
started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
|
