| Namita Kiran-Thuene |
Posted
on 28-Feb-01 02:59 PM
A Very Serious Thought on ‘Jerkism’- Part CLXI
Without the people like us this world will be a bland place. So I espouse the virtue of being a jerk, an absolute Jerk. Not just your run-of-the-mill kind of Jerk, but Jerks of all Jerks, the emperor of jerks of the world, Jerk Caesar if you like so.
Many people may not like being called jerk. All I have to say to these kind of people is wake up! See the goodness of being a jerk. As I define jerk: A jerk is a person whose mere presence makes the whole place stink so bad not only the faint hearted soul but the sturdiest hunks of all flee -covering their nose. A Jerk is a person who appears to know everything and anything AND not only that, imposes his/her view on innocent bystanders, AND NOT ONLY THAT he/she will MAKE you agree with him by swearing at you or just calling you ‘you are just stupid.’ My friends if you don’t see the virtue in being a jerk after reading all these things, then I have to say one more thing to you: You just don’t get it. Wake up and smell the coffee. Just listen to me and agree with me. You may think I am imposing my ‘elite’ view on you. That I am so blind with my superiority complex that I don’t see what a fool I am making of myself. That I am so sure of myself, being labeled as a jerk doesn’t bother me. Just like the elite death squad of the rightist government of Central America or the elite sycophants of the royal family who sucks of the blood of the ‘common people’ who I am sure like to be called elite and defend elitism, I like being called a jerk. At this point, I could swear taking the Lord’s name but today is Ash Wednesday so I will refrain. And of course I would not even dream of giving him the expletive middle name, because you know I am equal kind opportunity kind of gal. If I am going to call him names then I have to do the same thing with Krishna, Shiva, and Prophet Mohammed…
Oh, by the by did I tell you my dear readers I could speak 5 different language fluently? This has nothing to do with this article but on the second thought this serious thought has everything to do to the essence of this thoughtful article. You know being a jerk and not knowing when to shut up.
Now if you excuse me I have to go prepare dinner for my husband, get the baby from the day care, finish the work that I brought from work. You know all those important things that a really self-righteous jerk like me accomplishes beautifully. Also if you happen to write comments on it I won’t be able see it. I will be away for a month or two.
My agenda? Well, I just like globe trotting. I am going to Germany to ask dear old Kohl what he thinks about the neo-nazi’s attack on that poor fellow who died on the attack. It happened two years ago but hey I am the one who is going to ask that question. And while I am there I will barge my way into Shroeder’s parliament and ask how his dear friend Tony is doing. Also, in my agenda I am meeting our beloved king and queen and ask him how he liked the décor of his room while he was the state visitor of China. And lastly, after coming back to dear ol’ USA I will ask my pal Al how is he fairing after losing election to that super elitist that total suliminable guy,W.
Please don’t bother to comment. I know I am right and your meandering (I apologize if you find it too big of a word) comments don’t have any value. Long Live Jerkism, Jerks, and Jerkist.
Namita
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