| Username |
Post |
| NK |
Posted
on 13-Sep-02 11:37 AM
How much importance should I as a reader and a contributor of this site to the thread that is running under the headline, ".....your hostility sucks?"
Whenever this kind of personal attack peppered with profanity and sexual violence if the target is a woman, as in this case, it makes me sit back and think a bit, just a teenie bit. You know I am not that much of a thinker. Thoughts just escape me if I start thinking too much..... So what should be a proper response? Ignore it? Post denial? Defend the vicitim? And thus give an insignificant post a greater prominence? I try to stay away from this kind of posting but at the same time I am unequivocally against such an attack. Since silence is always read as an implicit affirmation I made my decision to talk against such a petty posting. I also do not want to lengthen an insignificant posting that is laced with despicable misogynistic utterances.
I do not need to defend Suna’s intellect capability (with a patronizing tone) for that needs no defense. And a small request to Suna and other friends who are and may face the similar situations: please don’t judge your friendship constantly putting in a loyalty balance.
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| deep |
Posted
on 13-Sep-02 12:25 PM
I agree, NK. I am with you on this.
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| Logical Sense |
Posted
on 13-Sep-02 12:28 PM
My two cents on this is, you have to explain yourself clearly and very firm manner to show your standing if it seems unclear by the hostile posting.
But, after few exchanges, the attitude should be 'Kauwa Karaiundai Garcha Pina Sukhdai Garcha'. Meaning just ignore. Those people are just getting thrilled after looking at their names (or alliases) popping up in the Sajha more often, that's it.
But, look at in broader sense, Sjha is maturing as a community and people like Suna, or Nk, or Paschim, or Ashu, or anepalikt or HG, or Biswo or deep or parmendra are great contributor and have themselves matured from their posting.
So, please give these newcomers also a chance to mature. Have not you seen many more getting matured and slowly coming to the mainstream Sajha if I may dare say?
Also in the flip side if people like those don't come forward then the discussion most of the time becomes 'boring', yaaaaaawning!!!!! Those people really make NK or Suna more matured. We observer type of people apprecieate a NK or a Suna more after reading your more mature response, how did you handle it?
During my growing up I was always told by my loved ones that people will judge me how I handle the most difficult situation .......Anybody can hanle the happy honky dory (spelling?) situation.
- iti
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| anepalikt |
Posted
on 13-Sep-02 01:02 PM
I am glad you reponded.
I am however intrigued by some of the stuff you say in your post.
I also thought about whether I should not respond to the thread you are referring to you. But that was only the third time:) The first two, I was simply reacting. But even then, even when I posted the third time, I was outranged enough that against my better judgement, I reponded to the thread rather than the little voice that was asking me "how much do you want to bring attention to this tripe"?
I personally don't judge all silences the same way. But in this instance, I did think that speaking up was necessary. And I am glad you reponded. What I wrote:
"The silence so far, of the "educated, mature and intellectual" cadre of this site, not only angers me, but truly truly disheartens me. But sadly enough, I am not surprised. This culture of silence is not about not adding fuel to a fire, rather it is more akin to acquiescing and enabling abusers and perpetrators of hate and violence!"
might have smarted a bit. I apologize for being so self-righteous.
But I want to clarify that what I wrote, about being truely dissabpointment by the "silence" was not said int he contest of friendship! My responses where not "acts of friendship" or "a show of loyalty". And my condemning people's silence was not a condemnation of their lack of alleigance to "friend"!
Rather, I belive I might have made a real terrible mistake. I should have kept Suna out of my responses altogether. What I did say about her being smart and what not might have come off as patronizing for you are on target to point out that "[one does] not need to defend Suna’s intellect capability (with a patronizing tone) for that needs no defense."
Even as I write this, I see others have responded here and there as well. For which I am grateful and heartened... though the dillema of the lengtheing post with a nasty start remains!
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