| Username |
Post |
| ashu |
Posted
on 04-May-01 02:47 AM
In Kathmandu I regularly meet Nepali students (undergrads, graduate students and professionals) on holidays from the US here who say they want to return to Nepal from America after their studies and some work experience.
They tell me: "I want to return to Nepal to do something for the country." And then, in all sincerity, they go on to give me their usual patriotic lecture about the real and imagined opportunities in Nepal and so on. This is all great.
I listen to all their kura-kani carefully, and they think that
I am in complete agreement with them.
But, when it appears that they are done with their desh-bhakti
bhajan, I pick up the tempo, look straight into their eyes, and tell them: "Don't come back for the country. The country doesn't need you. There is really no demand for people like you. Nobody really cares and nobody should care whether you are coming back to Nepal from Harvard or from Wall Street or from anywhere else. You are NOT doing anybody a favor by choosing to come back to Nepal. Don't delude yourself that you are being maa-haan by giving up US ko opportunities to come here."
And they are shocked.
Color changes in their faces.
Like they've been slapped by a friend who, given his own background as a returnee, should have been their biggest
cheer-leader.
But I have to be honest with them.
And so, after an uncomfortable minute or two -- during which my words get planted in their brains -- I then go on to explain my reasoning:
Come back to Nepal for your own PERSONAL reasons (i.e. for parents and family, for a change in scenery and so on).
NEVER come back to Nepal for desh ko reasons.
(The desh is complicated enough for insiders here to figure
out :-))
If you have certain goals for your life, even if those goals
are not crystal-clear, and if returning to Nepal leads
you nearer your goals, then, yes, it makes sense for you
to come back to Nepal and succeed or fail here on your own
terms.
But if you decide that your life ko goals are better met by staying and working in America, then you should stay in America, and be happy with your decision. Being a Nepali, after all,
does not mean that you have to be physically present in Nepal
all the time.
And those who return to Nepal are NO more 'patriotic' than
those who stay in America or wherever. You can live anywhere on the planet, and still be a Nepali, and that's great.
As Chatyang-Master, the famous Nepali humorist, has memorably
written somewhere: "There are many people who say that they
love Nepal. That's all good. But how come we don't have one single individual that Nepal loves?"
I thought that was a brilliant observation.
And so, I tell my friends:
Whether you stay in America or Nepal or whereever;
a) appeal to your own self-interest (i.e. figure out what makes you happy and productive?)
b) be patient, and
c) concentrate on being among the best in what you do -- doing your work with, as the poet Wislawa Symborzska says, love and imagination.
Once you are in Nepal for your own reasons, ONLY then you
can look around and choose from what's available. If what you
want is not here, then you have the enviable opportunity to
create that. And if the desh is helped by your work, fine
and good. But start out trying to help the desh, when you
haven't a clue about helping your own self to be happy
and productive.
Anyway, most of my friends agree with me; some do not,
and time goes on.
oohi
ashu
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| ashu |
Posted
on 04-May-01 03:52 AM
>But start out trying to help the
>desh, when you
>haven't a clue about helping your own self
>to be happy
>and productive.
CORRECTION: The above should have been:
But DO NOT start out trying to help the
desh, when you
haven't a clue about helping your own self
to be happy
and productive.
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| namita |
Posted
on 04-May-01 12:24 PM
Ashu,
Well said! You know being a "poet" and all [i am rolling my eyes; too bad you cannot see it :)]I had written a "poem" a long long time ago about this subject - being happy where I am - in the good old TND. I just want to add one thing - it may not be so relevant what you are saying but a thought is a thought which wants to escape now and then -
I have my own gripe about few (or even many) Nepali living (for years and years)abroad. No matter how long they are living in that place, maybe even a citizen, but being consumed with the nepali politics. I see them discussing heatedly what koirala and his predecessor did/does or how bad the daughter (koirala's)is, on the other hand, not showing even a remote interest in the politics of the land where they are living. No wonder we are are called a "silent brown majority." We pay our taxes, we don't make much noise, we try to be good students/workers and go home and read Gorkha Patra! Tomorrow let's say Bush and his cronies decide that all Nepali should go home I am not so unsure that there will be a single person in the Capital or around who has a clout to do anything about it. (just like mathmatician, economist, poets!, we need people in the politics also -for us to be heard).
I hope we will not have to go through what the Bhutani Nepali went through... 'Bagh Lagna Ghichhauna, Rand Lagyo Chichhauna.'
Reminds me of a scene from a movie 'East is East, West is West' (I think Biswo's "movie thing" is rubbing off on me !)where a bunch of Pakistani are having tea and discussing what a rogue country India is.. that they want to take kashmir away from them... While outside, the place is literally burning with the anti pakistani sentiment. I guess it is comforting to talk about home, home politics or "returning home" when you are in a foreign land!
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| ashu |
Posted
on 06-May-01 02:00 PM
Namita,
I posted the above after quietly and critically
observing two sets of "Amrika-returned" Nepalis
in Kathmandu. I have friends who belong to the
both sets.
The people belonging to the first set seem, in
general, happy and productive. Sure, their
work may not be all that great all the time, but
these people seem to have learnt to frame
their mindset with positive, can-do attitudes.
And those attitudes seem to enable to respond
to setbacks and failures with resiliency.
I would further think that the reason they seem happy and
productive in Nepal is that working/living in Nepal is a
part of their clear or not-so-clear life goals.
That is to say, they are here because they seem to have appealed to their own self-interest (of personal or
family or whatever reasons convincing to them),
and those reasons are what that drive them to
succeed here on their own terms.
As such, the conditions of the rest of country and the politics
seem not to affect them so seriously that they
cannot work. These people seem NOT to be influenced
too much by all the negative stuff that's happening
around them.
But people belonging to the second seem always so
worried about the country and desh ko bikas (larger, vague issues) all the time that they don't seem to realize that all that worrying has made them bitter, frustrated, angry and disillusioned young men and women.
These people seem to have come back thinking that Nepal owed them something, and that they were being ma-haan in giving up US ko whatever opportunities. And they look around, and
see dinimished shares of their pies, and they
ant pity from you, comfort from you.
You talk to these people over chicken chilly
and beer, and you end up shaking your head
at the depths of their frustration, anger,
and despair. And most of these people aren't
even 30 years old, et they talk as if they
were 60!! It's really so pathetic.
So, that's what prompted me to argue that when
deciding to return to Nepal -- either
temorarily or permanently -- people should
appeal to their oen self-interest to be
happy and productive -- regardless of what they
end up doing. Life, after all, is too short
to be miserable and unproductive.
Namita wrote:
>not showing even a remote interest in the
>politics of the land where they are living.
>No wonder we are are called a "silent brown
>majority." We pay our taxes, we don't make
>much noise, we try to be good students/
>workers and go home and read Gorkha Patra!
>Tomorrow let's say Bush and his cronies
>decide that all Nepali should go home I am
>not so unsure that there will be a single
>person in the Capital or around who has a
>clout to do anything about it. (just like
>mathmatician, economist, poets!, we need
>people in the politics also -for us to be
>heard).
I am confident that just like other immigrants from
other countries in the US, people of Nepali origin will start getting into American politics seriously when there
is a sizeable second- or third- or even fourth-generation
Nepali-American population. That time hasn't come
yet.
As things stand, it's VERY DIFFICULT, though by no
means impossible, to break into American politics
(local, regional or national).
The best that young Nepalis in America can do is
start attending political party meetings at their
colleges/communities, start volunteering at
elections, and thereby start building up networks
in one's area and see where those networks lead
to in years. As the famous of the US House of
Representative Tip O' Neill has taught us:
"All politics is local."
I wouldn't worry too much if Nepalis in the US are
discussing Koirala too much and GW Bush too little.
That's fine, and even expected.
oohi
ashu
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| Hari |
Posted
on 06-May-01 11:23 PM
I fully agree with the point of our lives being too short to not fulfill our own satisfaction but instead to do altruistic desh-bikasi things (Not to say that there aren't some people in that rare category of truly altruistic; but for them, they wouldn't care about reaping the benefits or ask for any kind of manyata in Nepal anyway).
So, yes, we should do what appeals to us, that passion of ours, first and foremost. If we are not self-satisfied, then the desh-bikasi program, however generous, will only be second-rate.
But there is the second question that Namita raises, of the Nepali representation in foreign governments. I think that is a different story altogether. That is valid only under the assumption that we are talking about Non-Resident Nepalis, and more so, about Nepali-Americans that have pretty much adopted US as their homeland. In that case, they should be encouraged to go into US politics just like any other US citizen.
The gray area is for people that are residents, but cannot totally give up their Nepali citizenship. What is in store for them? How should they function? As far as I know, most of them are here (for however long) with a "temporary" notion. They are here fulfilling themselves (and this is unlike the picture that ashu paints about some Nepalis in Nepal not doing things to their self-fulfillment). They remain here and work here because their personal, professional, spiritual, whatever other selves are satisfied more so than in Nepal.
But their underlying assumption (perhaps, hope) is that at one point in the future, they can be as satisfied doing whatever they are doing in Nepal rather than in the US. And that's what drives them into nationalistic sentiments. In my opinion, those sentiments are perfectly fine. Sure, they talk about Nepali politics, and to another Nepali, it seems as if they might be talking about Nepali politics all the time and may find such "kura matra" distasteful. But the fact is, they may be talking about US/Global politics with their work-mates, their foreign friends. Their concern about Nepali matters, be they social, cultural or political, can only be truly appreciated by a fellow Nepali, and hence the overabundance of political talk in Nepali gatherings.
So, in a nutshell, yes, feed your own desires, your own needs first. If those match Nepali development needs, all the better. For the rest outside of Nepal, don't be defensive if people start talking politics, there's nothing wrong with that. And sure, keep that hope alive about one day returning back to Nepal; there's nothing wrong with that either. As for people in Nepal, you too should fulfill your own needs, don't feel compelled to stay in Nepal JUST because you want to prove to others that you are a true patriot. If fulfilling your need means migration, by all means, do it. And for people that have returned back to Nepal and are content, great. For those that have returned to Nepal, are somewhat frustrated but are still passionate about what they're doing, great! For those that have returned but have somehow lost their passion, it's time to head back to bidesh.
Dui Paise Musings,
Hari
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