| Username |
Post |
| happy keti |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 11:55 AM
When I see people writing about thier life,I also want to write about my past.I'm not a good writer and can't express is perfectly but just want to share it with u guys!
Yea I remember,not clearly but I was damn infatuated,yes he was not that handsome,but at that time,I found him one of the most handsome man.Funny hah!He tried to draw my attention towards him and I was drawn,I was so young at that time,15,16 maybe and I thought I loved him.I was ready to do everything for him.Yea with the help of my friends,I gathered courage and called him .I know at that time,he knew I was in love (?)with him but he pretended to ignore me.Well,I gave up hope.Never in my life was I rejected like that.I felt my world had ended,but slowly I came back to normal,few tears in my pillow had dried up and I was almost back to normal.Then one day,I got a phone call and it was him.He wanted to meet me.Meet him?That was very difficult for me.My family was very strict and I couldn't go to public declaring my love,showing my love.We arranged to meet near my house as at that time,I was too scared to go far.We met.He told me that he doesn't love me and he kept telling me all sorts of things,which had shattered all my hope,dreams.Then why did he want to meet me?I kept asking to myself,couldn't ask him as I was scared at that time.I came back and my life slowly came back to normal.Again I got a call from him.If I was as strong as I am now,I would have ignored him but at that time,I couldn't and again went to see him.He again said that He had a feelings for me .I was happy then but thi s on & off continued .I kept going on hoping that one day he would love me for good.He used to talk about money and how much his friend got in dowery or so.He used to ask me how much my family would give him as dowery and he would ask in a way as if he was joking.I was surprised !He? talking about dowery ?Son of such a family wanted dowery?But I was blind and just ignored al these.
My life went on.1,2years passed on like that and he went to study,we had no contact in the mean time. After completing his studies,he again came back and told me that he found me very attractive,loved me a lot and wanted to marry me.I was at that time the most happy lady.We used to meet sometimes ,and i had to put a lot effort to hide this from my family.MY dad wanted me to go to US and study but I rejected the plan and told him that I was happy to study in nepal.Then I talked to him regarding that and he told me not to leave him.I agreed and wanted him to send the proposal to my dad.At that time he hesitated,i was a fool i didn't realise his wicked way at that time,I wanted to know the reason and he said that his family was against our marriage ,they didn't like love marriage but then again told me he would make them accept me.I was shocked.Why would they reject me?We had the same caste,our social status was almost the same(although he thought he was far superior than us)And I was good looking too.But I kept pining hopes that one day he would send proposal to my family,But he never did.After my graduation my parents wanted me to settle down ,and I told him so but he just ignored me.WHen my dad brought proposals,i told him that I was in love with that guy and wanted to marry him.My parents were at first shocked,scolded me ,told me I betrayed their trust,,but later(don't know why?) they agreed and wanted to talk to him.When I told him this,he was angry at me.He said all sort of bad things to me and told me why couldn't I waited for him.I told him That I would wait for him as long as he wanted but I wanted him to meet my parents at that time.He didn't.My parents were surprised.They told me that If he also loved me ,then he would definitely meet them .But I told them that he had his reasons and he would one day.There was a growing tensions at home.BUt he never stopped calling me./WHen I asked him the reasons for not seeing my parents,he would just ignore me.He had a domineering personality and i was at that time easily dominated.My parents were by that time angry with me.They wanted me to settle down or go abroad to study.I was rejecting whatever they said ,i was giving a very hard time to my parents,thank god I have so understanding parents,they agreed to give me some time,give him some time but he started telling bad things about my parents and my family but blind and fool I was then,I kept lingering,lingering for 2 more years.
One day out of surprise,I herad from a friend that he eloped with a girl inspite of his parents rejection and was married by then.He married a very very rich man's daughter and he got a lot of money from his inlaws.I was shocked.I had no one at that time I felt lonell, i cried and told my parents al about that.I never know,even now what my parents went through ,but they supported me,they gave me some time to settle in life.I heard a lot about him later,but then it was too late.And all those years I was just making a fool of myself.I was crying and crying and crying.bUt time as everyone knows is a healing factor and I was normal finally.
Now when I look back,I find myself a dumb,fool and idiot.And I laugh at my self.I was such a fool.But now I'm very happy,here in US,I have a very good ,understanding husband,a very good job,i think i earn more then what he got in his dowery!and I'm not even 30.I feel that I have come a long way!I have now no feelings for him ,not even hard feelings for him,he is now a stranger to me but when I look back,I find myself a fool.But God has given me a very good chance by giving me a very good man and I feel my husband is far far above him in his thinkings.And I am at last very happy!I thank God that he eloped with that girl !
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:00 PM
Happy keti
Live and learn as life goes on!
:)
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| Deep |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:01 PM
sitara happy kt ho?
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| paramendra |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:03 PM
"But now I'm very happy,here in US,I have a very good ,understanding husband,a very good job,i think i earn more then what he got in his dowery!and I'm not even 30."
All the glory to you.
Thanks for writing this piece. It throws light on stuff quite widely prevalent1
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| paramendra |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:04 PM
Hoina. I don't think so. Comapare their writing styles. Besides, I did not think Sitara was married....
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| Rusty |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:05 PM
Happy KT,
I am happy to see you happy.... You learned by your mistakes that you made in the past.
Sitara Ji, ignorance is also another form of discrimination, isn't it?? :|
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| paramendra |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:06 PM
Happy Keti.
This is probably the first time at Sajha that I have appreciated people using fake names. I guess you might not have been as frank if it were not for the anonymity of your username. And I am glad for that.
:-)
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:11 PM
Lau!!!!
Sitara is happy and she is a kt!
But she is not happy kt!
Kya speculations bhanya ni!
Ok here is a secret: Sitara is single.... resides in the sky....happily out of reach!!!!!!!!
But she has 25 children! ;)
So, if you love me, you'll have to live mine!!!!!!!!!!!!
:)
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:13 PM
"So, if you love me, you'll love mine"!!!!!!!!! Typo correction!
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| Deep |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:21 PM
Some are quick in delivering their faulty judgement.
What I wrote was "Sitara happy kt ho?" I did NOT ask sitara "HAPPY KETI" ho? Take a look at original poster's handle.
I am NOT saying Sitara is the orginal poster of "MY PAST,I DON'T EVEN CARE!"
"Sitara is happy and she is a kt! " - Sitara.
This is exactly what I meant! I was refering to a happy girl not a registered poster "happy keti".
Relax!
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| Rusty |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:28 PM
Ati Bhayo....aba... ma pani fire up hunu paryo!!! As always...this song is dedicated to my D-area teamate Sitara :p
Song name: Happy
Singer: Ashanti
Type chai ...hiphop/ R&B paryo
you fill me with so much joy you give whatever it is I need,
my love here to stay won't ever leave.
So glad that you fell in love with me
My love is so good that I wouldn't be without
you babe couldn't see me without you babe,
my love is so good that I wouldn't be without you
babe couldn't see me without you baby,
all my life I've been searching for you everyday, so glad
that I found you boy,
all my life I've been feeling for you everyday
I'm so happy baby, boy you
got me feeling so good you take all my pain away
from me without you around I couldn't be and I
know you fell in love with me.
My love is so good that I wouldn't want to be without you babe
couldn't see me without you babe.
My love is so good that I wouln't be without you baby couldn't see me
Without you baby.
All my life I've been searching for you everyday, so glad that I found you boy,
all my life I've been feeling for you everyday I'm so happy baby
I'm so happy that I fell in love
I thank God
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| slipknot |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:31 PM
Again, yet another great story of revival and courage, I am glad to know you have found strength in dealing with what is meted out to you by life.
I wish you'd met me, i'd have followed you thru until death did us apart, in health and sickness! :) Hehe..
Regards,
Slipknot.
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| lonely |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:33 PM
happy keti...
you were lucky on what has turned out to be for you. Not everyone is lucky and can overcome such situations easily.
BUt now you have achieved alot ..that's great....
No need to remember your past, right?
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| oys_chill |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:38 PM
sorry to be redundant..........but couldn't resist kafka in here
The gesture of rejection which always met me did not mean "I don't love you" but rather "you can't love me, much as you'd like to ; you are unhappily in love with your love for me, yet your love for me isn't in love with you."
Therefore, it's not right to say I've known the words "I love you." All I have known is the expectant silence that should have been broken by my saying
"I LOVE YOU"
adeu! Happy Kt, all the best !
oys
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| Deep |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 12:49 PM
It's always better to be with the one who loves you rather than with one you love.
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| Logical Sense |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 01:20 PM
Happy Kt, why even you are feeling you were fool back then?
I totally see otherwise. You did exactly how a teenager growing in our social environment does, but, you did much better than the rest of the pack. You kept your communication open with the persion you were infatuated with, you did not run away with him though, you asked him to do the right thing to ask your hands from your parents. Inspite of feeling bad your parents are cultured and definitely love you unconditionally, and you also kept the honor with your parents and told them everything. Above all these problems, you kept studying and finished your studies.
So, this happy ending should make you not only proud of your present, but, you should feel proud of your past too, because I do not see anything questionable you did even as a teenager in your past which should for a moment make you feel bad.
I sincerely hope your story gives strength to all teenagers who are going through similar situation and all grown ups who had similar past. To analyze, look back and feel proud of themselves.
Congratulations my dear, and give your lovely husband a big hug from Logical Sense's side.
You are definitely a winner!
- iti
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| ruck |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 01:25 PM
Well said Logical Sense.. I agree with you...
All the best happy keti..
Ruck!!
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| happy keti |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 02:03 PM
Hey !Thank you for the support!
I appreciate u guys took your time to read my past!
MAybe I was egoistic or maybe I had the strenght,I managed to study,bhanchhan ni ikh nabhayeko manchhe ra bikh nabhayeko sarpa kam ko hudaina.Maybe My ikh worked in my life.I was hurt ,badly,led down,but by the grace of the GOd,I moved on.It had been very difficult at times,specially with my parents,but after all they r parents and they forgave me,supported me,and helped me to choose the right path!They are back in Nepal,but are always close to my heart,with me, every second, and I love them ,unconditionally!If they were not there at the right time,I would have been destroyed,completely destroyed.
Anyway,Thankyou again all of you,paramendra,logical sense,ruck,deep,sitara,slipknot,lonely,rusty........... and you know I just feel like sharing without giving my identity.Thanks to thiis sajha board.But when I look back,I feel betrayed,but that betrayal has helped me a lot and now has made me very happy!
T
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 02:11 PM
Happy keti;
No regrets! Never a moment of regret! Acknowledge your past and let it go; embrace your future!
Wish you luck!
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 02:14 PM
Rusty ji
As always I am moved by your songs and sentiments!
Thank you! :)
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| Deep |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 02:21 PM
Happy Keti,
Happy Tyar.
Ani Sitara ji,
Happy Tyar hai hajur lai ni.
Ani ni....don't keep moving too much there up in the sky. Small collison there might cause havoc here ni...hai.
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| dhumbasse (dumbass) |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 02:47 PM
Yo sitara le bole ki mero man jharanga jhranaga garcha joshiyera, santosh lagcha, at the same time makes me emotional too, specially when she is replying to a thread like this...
You Go Sitara!!
always your admirer re kya aja lastma..hehe
Happy Kt!! mero dui paise suggetion" do look into your past, don't dwell into it, leave in the present , don't trust the future, coz noone knows the future ( Except TRIKAL baje, you might wanna check with him)"
wish u the best haapy KT.
Deepdai, Tyesari na tarshaunusna hamilai, Mathi ke hunch ke hundaina hamilai ke thaha. tara je bhaye pani hamro Sitara chahi udai nai rahanu parcha , Himali Sitara Bhayera..
Peace...
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| bideshi |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 03:11 PM
Happy Keti,go ahead u girl!
I agree with logical sense,u have nothing to regret!Infact u should feel proud of urself!Best of luck in ur life and ur past is as u said is passed.So,move on as u r doing now!Good luck!
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| lamachaur |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 03:50 PM
happy keti ji,
you are my hero! Through all those moments of pain and heartache you persevered and managed to pull yourself together. you are a fighter, i have to admit and you have my utmost respect. All i need say further i guess is enjoy your life and good luck for the future.
regards ,
lamachaur
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| happy keti |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 04:41 PM
lamachaur,
Thankyou for making me your hero!ButI don't feel I deserve that because I gave a lot of trouble to my parents at that time,I gave them many sleepless nights.I kept quiet and didn't even argue when he told all sort of bad things to my parents. Fool.blind I was then!I didn't recognise him.I didn't realise what a fool I was to love him all those years .And more over my aim then was to get him!To be with him or let me say to marry him!
Yea,I did study,but that was not my ultimate goal at that time.I studied then for fear of my parents and I came to US at the very right time when high tech was blooming and it was easy to get job!And my luck!I got the job and now I feel I am doing ok with my life though I have a lot to do yet!Let me say I'm happy keti! I think luck,family back ground (parents attitude)and time factor makes a lot of diference in ones life!And I feel I'm one of those lucky!
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 04:54 PM
Happy keti
The greatest thing you can do for your life is to forgive yourself and your past...
Don't be so harsh on yourself, or it will haunt you for ever.
Allow this much: Given the time, space and the level of your maturity, you did your best!
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 04:59 PM
Dhumbasse ji and Deep ji...
Thank you... it is wonderful to know that i have your good wishes!
:)
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| Junkie |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 05:05 PM
happy keti
All's well that ends well ..... and maybe it'll be more well when we get to hear about how much more happier you are (will be?) with your tini-mini, bhara-bhura, trick or treating children :-) !!!!
And Dhumbasse is correct!. Trikal gurudev lay bhaneko Future ..... farakai khadainah. Try him to find out ways to curb any future "bad rashi"!
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| DHUMBASSE (DUMBASS) |
Posted
on 01-Nov-02 05:11 PM
Sitara!! good wishes matrai..Hehe
:)
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| KaLaNkIsThAn |
Posted
on 02-Nov-02 10:18 AM
Happy keti jyu,
your past was never yours. How can you say it is yours, when you have it only in your memory? There is no way you can change your past, you cannot manipulate your past, you cannot do anything with your past. Its like books in the reference section of the library. you can go, read it, put word by word in your memory, but that book is not yours, it doesn't belong to you -- even if you say, you remember the word by word from that book. The only thing that is yours, is the thing that you posses in this moment. If you posses a nice designer dress, then that dress is yours. you can get rid of it if or you can keep it if you want to. you cannot do that with your past. You were just the part of the past, part of that time.
You don't know your future. So your future is not yours either. You don't posses it.
The only thing that is yours is the moment that you are living right now. You can manipulate it, change it. Like, you read my message, and you have billions of choices. You will either reply me, or you wont. if you reply, it will be either in the furious tone, or not. And its all up to you how you wanna do it, before you make it your past.
Achcha lekin london ko chisho le satula.
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| DHUMBASSE (DUMBASS) |
Posted
on 02-Nov-02 09:33 PM
Junkie le aajkal ali kam tanna thalya jasto cha re kya aja lastma...hehe :)
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| Junkie |
Posted
on 03-Nov-02 02:52 AM
Lasta mah aayera goli lagee halo ...... See Happy_keti, pastah mah basyo bhane yehi Dhumbasse jasto hunchha .....
Dhumbasse .... yeso current affairs pani badhnay gara. I long QUIT gaja, saja. I am a changed man. A good boy just like my dad wanted and my mom predicted ...... re kya aja endah mah aayera ;)
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| DHUMBASSE (DUMBASS) |
Posted
on 03-Nov-02 07:21 AM
Junkie , I aplogize if I offended..it was a joke , meant to be a joke.
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| Junkie |
Posted
on 03-Nov-02 08:13 AM
Haray Dhumbasse jee ...... Lau mah kaha risako chhu rah :-) .........
Risaunay manchhe sanga man tah boldai, boldina nee ;)
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| aeiou |
Posted
on 03-Nov-02 11:33 AM
happy kt--life begins at 30. look forward. there's so much ahead.
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| kalankisthan |
Posted
on 03-Nov-02 06:27 PM
happy kt life begins at 30
got rid of diaper, don't know how to use potty
bole picchae bolchin " ma ta boldina, katti"
acts like ten and looks like sixty.
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| arch119 |
Posted
on 03-Nov-02 08:29 PM
Happy kt,
thanks for ending ur autobiograpy happily .... (had it been a tragic one, man, i would have been thinking a lot about impertinent stuffs)
and ur past was never a regretful one (i used to think only the actresses of hindi films can act that way)
May God vouchsafe our country with more girls like u and keep them away from guys like that sonofabitch who eloped with that daughterofarich.
regards,
arch119
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