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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 08:10 AM
INVESTIGATORS have been asked to prove if a weeping statue of the Virgin Mary in Western Australia is an act of God or a fake religious curiosity.
The inquiry into the "miracle" is unprecedented in Australia, according to the Archbishop of Perth, Barry Hickey.
Scientists from two Perth universities have already tested the 70cm sculpture, but were unable to find the source of the rose-scented oil that trickles from its eyes.
The Reverend Father Finbarr Walsh, from Our Lady of Lourdes Church in Rockingham, south of Perth, where the statue is displayed, has been inundated with requests from around the world for samples of the liquid.
Archbishop Hickey now wants to know if the statue is merely an interesting curiosity or a miraculous symbol of Christianity.
"The phenomenon has been going on for more than three months now," he Hickey said.
"The faithful and the community at large are entitled to as clear a statement as I can make, about whether the tears can be explained by some natural process or human intervention, or whether they defy scientific explanation."
Archbishop Hickey has appointed a team of three, one a non-Catholic, to find out why the Madonna has been "crying" for the past 100 days.
The investigators are scientist and non-Catholic, Dr Thelma Koppi, the Reverend Father Kevin Long and surgeon Michael Shanahan.
"The three will arrange whatever scientific test they consider necessary," Archbishop Hickey said.
"As well as their own scientific, theological and historical expertise, they will be able to take suggestions from anyone in the scientific community who has ideas on what would be needed to determine whether the phenomenon can be explained."
The archbishop has made only one stipulation for the sculpture's examination, and that is not to damage it.
He'd like an answer, if possible, within a month.
Fake or miracle, the statue has drawn thousands of people to the tiny church.
The Madonna statue, which cost parishioner Patty Powell $150, from a religious shop in Thailand, was first seen weeping on March 19 during the feast of St Joseph, the husband of Mary, and then over the four days of Easter.
It again began to "cry" on August 15, the feast of the Assumption of Our Lady into our Heaven, and has wept continuously since.
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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 08:21 AM
The link is rated R
http://www.azlyrics.com/t/tenaciousd.html
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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 08:25 AM
Comics Roast Egghead
"I'd have to politely suggest to Dr. Wiseman that he stick to his day job … We politely refer to some guys as a N.G.N.A — Nice Guy, No Act."
— Eddie Brill, booker for comedians, Late Show With David Letterman
"If the British are spending money on this, God knows what else they're spending it on … The joke isn't funny. It isn't even in the ballpark of funny. 'Two Jews walk into a bar without a punch line' is funnier."
— Lewis Black, commentator, The Daily Show on Comedy Central
"We now know why there are no rocket scientists — or any scientists, for that matter — on Hollywood Squares."
— Dom DeLuise, who says the hardest part of working on Hollywood Squares is "squeezing your butt into those little spaces."
"This is a joke about a man who kills his friend. The really funny thing is that this joke wouldn't work if the two hunters were women. Now, I wish science could explain that."
— Suzie Essman, who's appearing this week in HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm and Comedy Central's Crank Yankers
"That joke is such a bomb, the government is threatening to use it against Iraq."
— Jeff Gurian, comedy writer for Friars Club Roasts, Joan Rivers, and Rodney Dangerfield
"I could make that joke funny, but only if I used obscenities every three words."
— Gilbert Gottfried, stand-up comic and voice of the AFLAC duck in TV commercials
"Sure, Dr. Wiseman can find the funniest joke, but can he screw in a light bulb? I hear the second funniest joke is his resume."
— Malcolm Kuschner, speechwriter, author of Public Speaking for Dummies
"What's funny is that hunters don't carry cell phones. That's a stupid joke! And it's long!"
— Mario Cantone, stand-up comic who appears regularly on HBO's Sex and the City as Anthony, Charlotte's frenetic gay friend
"Scientists have once again proven they are the utmost boring people on earth."
— Carol Montgomery, Las Vegas-based comic
"Whoever told that joke was wasting his breath … and that was no great loss, either."
— Groucho Marx interpreter Frank Ferrante, imagining what Groucho would say
"This study was conducted on the Internet … I don't believe anything on the Internet. If you're reading my comments, I probably didn't say any of this."
— Ellen Cleghorne, former Saturday Night Live cast member
"It sounds like they polled their lab monkeys, instead of people with a sense of humor."
— Barry Dougherty, comedy writer and author of How To Do It Standing-Up … The Friars Club Guide To Being A Comic, A Cut-Up, A Card, Or A Clown
"This is the kind of research you do when you graduate last in your class."
— Lenny Marcus, a computer programmer turned "Geek Comic," who recently appeared at the Montreal Comedy Festival
"That's the kind of joke that must be written in prison. No self-respecting stand-up comic would use it. My mother might like it. In fact, I'm going to call her and tell it to her."
— Eddie Ifft, New York-based stand-up comic who's appeared on Comedy Central's Premium Blend
"I can absolutely guarantee that's not the greatest joke. I wrote a better one last week: 85-year-old Phyllis Diller has a stalker. Not to worry, he's in a walker."
— Phyllis Diller
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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 08:28 AM
Red Cross: 215 Dead in Riots Sparked by Miss World Article
LAGOS, Nigeria — The regional governor warned rioters would be shot on sight Sunday as hundreds of people fled the northern Nigerian city of Kaduna after four days of religious violence over the Miss World pageant killed 200 people.
The violence among Muslims and Christians began after a newspaper article last week said Islam's founding prophet would have chosen a Miss World contestant for a wife. The pageant was then moved to London and the contestants packed their gear and flew to the British capital.
By late Saturday, the Nigerian Red Cross counted 215 bodies on the streets and in mortuaries throughout Kaduna, 100 miles north of the capital Abuja, said Emmanuel Ijewere, president of the organization. Previous estimates said 100 people killed.
An unknown number of others killed in the riots were believed to have been buried by family members uncounted, Ijewere told The Associated Press.
No new violence was reported Sunday in Kaduna, a Muslim-dominated city with a large Christian minority. Still, hundreds of people recovered what valuables they could from their destroyed homes and fled in cars, buses and on foot.
Those who stayed attended church services and replenished food stocks at markets, where a few meat and vegetable stalls reopened.
The Kaduna governor, Ahmed Makarfi, told state radio that security forces would "shoot on sight" anyone inciting new violence.
Yakubu Ibrahim, 27, returned to find his home in ruins Sunday after taking refuge at a local army barracks for three days.
"I lost everything except my shirt and my pants. I don't even have shoes," said Ibrahim, whose parents and four siblings were missing after the riots.
The fighting began after the Lagos-based ThisDay newspaper published an article on Nov. 16 saying Islam's founding prophet would have approved of the pageant.
"What would Muhammad think? In all honesty, he would probably have chosen a wife from among them," Isioma Daniel wrote.
Muslim protesters burned down the paper's office in Kaduna on Wednesday and rioting briefly spread to the capital, Abuja, on Friday before ending a day later.
More than 500 people were injured and 4,500 left homeless in Kaduna, Ijewere said. Casualty figures were not immediately available for Abuja.
The 80 Miss World contestants arrived in London Sunday on a hastily organized flight from Nigeria. The London show is scheduled for Dec. 7, the same day it had been planned for Nigeria.
"Obviously it's been quite daunting but I'm just happy to be home, looking forward to seeing my family," said Miss England, 22-year-old Daniella Luan.
The top Nigerian Islamic leader called on Muslims not to resume fighting. In an interview published Sunday in ThisDay, Lateef Adegbite, secretary-general of the Nigerian Supreme Council for Islamic Affairs, forgave the newspaper.
ThisDay has run several apologies in recent days, saying the offensive portion of the article was published by mistake.
"We accept that explanation in good faith, and I call on all Nigerian Muslims to forgive ThisDay newspapers," Adegbite said. "Such a thing should never be done again. And it should be a lesson to others."
Adegbite said Nigerian Muslims were grateful Miss World had been moved to London.
"We thought it was wrong," he said, describing the pageant as a "parade of nudity" that is disrespectful of Islam.
Much of the violence Friday and Saturday was by Christians retaliating against Muslim neighborhoods, Ijewere said.
"Some Christians feel especially bitter, because with the exit of Miss World, they have lost a symbolic battle while the Muslims have won," Ijewere said. "Our greatest fear is that it could spread to other cities now."
At least 22 churches and eight mosques were destroyed in the mayhem, said Shehu Sani of the Kaduna-based Civil Rights Congress. Ten hotels were also badly damaged, said Sani, whose group confirmed more than 200 people were killed.
One policeman and one soldier were arrested on allegations of dragging 15 Muslim men out of their homes and killing them, Sani said. The victims' bodies were then thrown into a river, he said.
There were also reports that police and soldiers gunned down more than a dozen other civilians without provocation, he said.
A police spokesman could not immediately confirm the reports.
Ethnic and religious fighting is common in Nigeria, Africa's most populous nation. More than 10,000 people have been killed in clashes since civilian government replaced military rule in 1999, and Kaduna alone saw riots in March 2000 that killed up to 2,000 people.
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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 08:31 AM
The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car
drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest
words. These instances of faulty writing serve to confirm that even
incompetent writing may be highly entertaining.
Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
I thought my windows was done but I found out it was up when I put my head
through it.
I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I
hit him.
I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and
headed over the embankment.
In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I
reached an intersection, a hedge sprange up, obscuring my vision and I did
not see the other car.
I had been driving for 40 years when I feel asleep at the wheel and had an
accident.
I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal
joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
As I approached the intersection, a sign suddenly appeared in a place
where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time
to avoid the accident.
To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
I told the police that I was not injured but on removing my hat, I found
that I had a fractured skull.
I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the
road when I struck him.
The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run so I ran over him.
I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentlemen as he bounced off the hood of
my car.
The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a
big mouth.
I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a
ditch by some stray cows.
The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its
way when it struck my front end.
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| KoKo |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 09:28 AM
The Church of England has formally endorsed using dance music as a
method of recruiting young people in a strategy they’re labelling
“raves
in the nave”. The concept has just won backing from the Church’s
organising body the General Synod and could see chaplains appointed to
clubs, the Telegraph reported this week.
The idea first emerged in the mid 90s through groups like the Worldwide
Message Tribe (now known as the Tribe) who spoke to Muzik magazine in
1996 about their club friendly approach.
“Dance music is the music of the kids of Manchester,” the Tribe’s then
chief Andy Hawthorne told the magazine. “We think of ourselves as
missionaries. Most kids in Manchester are pagans because they don’t
know
the basic information about the Christian faith.
Also appearing in the same 1996 Muzik article was another evangelical
dance producer, whose uncompromising views on religion and wholesome
living at the time made him one of club culture’s most mocked and
reviled individuals.
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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 10:04 AM
Veteran rapper BENZINO has attacked EMINEM, tagging him as a '2003 Vanilla Ice' on a track from his forthcoming album, 'Redemption'. Making him the latest music act to publicly fall out with Eminem following spats with artists including Moby, Insane Clown Posse, Everlast, Christina Aguilera and Backstreet Boys.
Raymond 'Benzino' Scott - co-founder of US hip hop bible The Source - also claims that Eminem wouldn't have achieved his megastar status without him in a rap: "You was unsigned hype before you ever met Dre/ I birthed your little career, now you owe your life to Ray."
However Benzino claims "Pull Your Skirt Up" is his reaction to racism in American pop culture.
"I had a problem with 'the machine,' with the double standard in hip-hop," he told US MTV. "Certain media outlets take to him and look at him as the saviour in hip-hop and the #1 in hip-hop and do not recognize the guys out here that created hip hop. ... Eminem is just the hood ornament for the machine. ... You think I could grab my crotch and put my ass in people's faces the way he does? No way. But as long as the color of his skin and his eyes fits what America wants, ... it's all right."
Eminem has already recorded two response tracks, 'I Don't Wanna' and 'Nail in the Coffin'. In the former, Eminem berates Benzino for being too old and lacking in dignity to rap as well as using his position at The Source to get rappers to contribute to his album. On 'Nail in the Coffin' Benzino is described as "the softest, fakest, wannabe gangster in New York".
Both songs aired Thursday night on DJ Kay Slay's WQHT-FM radio show in New York. The tracks will be included in Kay Slay's latest mixtape, Street Justice Part 6: Loyalty and the Terror.
Benzino's second solo album 'Redemption' is due in January. Last year's debut solo album 'The Benzino Project', was met by a largely indifferent public despite appearances from famous names including P. Diddy. The rapper first hit the public consciousness in the early 1990s as a member of Boston's Almightly RSO
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| Koko |
Posted
on 25-Nov-02 02:35 PM
21.11.2002
Musik: Daft Punk und William Orbit produzieren für Britney Spears
Daft Punk sind nicht nur eigenwille Produzenten - sie sind auch bei Pop-Ikonen wie Britney Spears beliebt. Weil ihr aktuelles Album "Britney" weit hinter den erwarteten verkauften Einheiten zurückblieb, sucht sie nach Verstärkung bzw. nach Veränderungen. Ihr nächstes Album ist für die zweite Hälfte 2003 geplant. So sucht sich Britney - ähnlich wie Madonna - Verstärkung im Dance-Lager: Daft Punk und William Orbit werden einige Titel dem neuen Album beisteuern. Bereits 1998 steuerte William Orbit Madonna's Album "Ray Of Light" viele Tracks bei und verpasste Madonna einen Soundwechsel.
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