| being_optimistic |
Posted
on 28-Feb-03 12:49 PM
I always think, it is better (probably important) to give some background for the readers about the writer for the shake of portraying the clear picture of the feelings and the meaning of the writing. I think, that is one of the reason the first page of the every book gives the introduction of the writer himself. I am all saying this, because I thought the nature of the subject(I am writing today) I think, forced me to explain sothat the readers understand what I feel.
I am in US, studying electrical engineering. To be to the point, I am always patriotic and always wanted to be the one. I want to serve my country in one or the other way. Why I mentioned electrical engineering earler is generally thinking, I thought I could go back to my country and work in hydro-electricity project, and in fact, Nepal being the second richest country of the world, can do a lot in case of development by utilizing the water resources like in producing hydro-electricity, irrigation and so on. To be honest, whenever I pray for the God, besides asking the good of my family and myself, I always ask God to help me to be a good electrical engineer and go back to my country and work for my fellowpeople. That is, I always remember my people. I don't know, when this dream of mine is coming true. Earlier, I had an aim to become a good politician as I thought it was the best thing I could be to help my country people in my short life. May be, I was so miserable seeing the rural life of Nepal. However, I abondoned this idea later because I thought working as a one in any field u desire is also the way to help the country. If everyone in their respective field does that a doctor helping as a doctor, an engineer being an engineer, a teacher working as teacher and so on, we together can be successful in a lot of ways, then we had expected earlier as thinking alone. That's why, I chose engineering as my profession.
This was and is my wish, but where is my action that needs to go along with it. After I am here (in US), what I did and what I could do even I tried too, for my country. I am studying harder and smarter to earn a good gpa. Whenever, I get chance, I go to nepalnews.com, and other websites to learn current ongoings in Nepal. Besides, when get a chance, I talk with my roomates and other relatives about Nepali politics and the difference in terms of development in Nepal and other countries including US. The main thing what is going on my mind is am I being attracted to reside in US and just abort the idea of going back to Nepal. Why is this happening?. Because, I don't get proper job while returning there in Nepal!......, because the political situation is going worser(by news) day by day!.....because a lot of people are striving to come here in US and I am the one who wants to return back to Nepal!.....why not do job here in a nice company, get a green card, earn dollars, have a decent life!... .My small mind(just 21 years) is really confussed. I have heard from nobody in US (may be I didn't have contacts to such person), saying me you should return back to Nepal and do something in your field. I know some in Nepal (not everybody) would surely suggest to come back here in Nepal and do something, as I am in need of. I think now in Nepal too (I just assume), who are frustated with their lives with the ongoing circumstances, think "hey! why do u want to return to Nepal. U know what, if u come, u should do a lot of chakari (nepali term for doing something with an intention of getting something), to do certain things done. U would not like the environment. U guys living in US, who knows what is right and what is responsibility(one top Nepali businessman said to me while visiting N.Y ), surely would not like being in the world where u should do a lot of chakaris for doing something." So, everything has affected me and made me to reconsider my want to return back to my country after I get my degree here. So, what is in my mind now (to give end to this going or not going back to Nepal permanently) is-" let me build my own name here either by doing some research or doing some job" and then go back sothat I would not be a victim of frustation directly confronting the tough situation of struggle there in Nepal.
{{I know, this piece of writing is just my feelings. I would add more to it on coming days i.e within two weeks when I really have a mood and get chance to write freely. I would surely expect your suggestions and comments.Bye for now.}}
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