| Username |
Post |
| Brook |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 07:04 AM
Betrayal of the Southbound Herd
When He,
who hadn't the eyes to see,
enamored with vision-
Us,
who had the strength
but not direction,
much less, the reason.
And when He,
who hadn't the gall to act
empowered with courage-
Us,
who were scared,
oblivious of the force we were
in collection.
Like ants we marched
to the tune of his wand
Following He.
He, who knew not
the way-
to his own home.
Lightening struck,
and heroes fell.
Again and again.
One by one.
Until the last among us,
gasping for a final,
feeble fill
of his perforated lung,
Opened his eyes and descried-
There!
shaking hands with the Devil
was He.
He who had found,
a higher bidder
for a dream.
A dream that had
already been sold.
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| Nepe |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 08:16 AM
One of the best poems I ever read. Shook my soul. Yesto poem po poem !
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| Deep |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 08:48 AM
Brook,
A good one. Hope to read more from you.
"He who had found,
a higher bidder
for a dream.
A dream that had
already been sold."
Even though I found this last part quite strong enough to end the poem, selling dream to a higher bidder is a common phenomenon. My observation reaffirms my belief that only those who are exceptionally exceptions - frankly, I am not included - don't sell sold dreams to a higher bidder. Rest are involved in this lucrative business of selling dreams - sell dream to a higher bidder regardless of the status of the dream being bid.
He who does not find a higher bidder for a dream - a dream that had already been sold - is either a master of bad dreams or lacks the selling techniques.
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| najar |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 08:56 AM
Ahem Ahem Brook :)
Good to see your poetic side! Beautifully composed. Hope to read more hai.
Nepe jyu--hyalluu! :)
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 09:15 AM
Brook ji
Superb! Delves into your phsyche...(at least it did to mine!). Thank you!
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| PremPujari |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 10:12 AM
Brooks maah myaan!!!
Awesome poem ni dude. Nepe le bhanya jastai "shook me up".
It's great to find people who I admire the most and were lost somewhere along the road.
I hope to read more from you in the coming days. How about atleast one writing a day? hehe.
Have a good one.
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| surya |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 10:42 AM
Very nice!
Hear hear to Nepe's "Yesto poem po poem!"
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| nell |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 11:10 AM
Nicely written brook.
I kinda agree with Surya there. Nepe, that was a very strong sentiment to make. If you say, "yesto poem po poem" that sounds like, 'degrading' some really fabolous poetries here.
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| surya |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 11:21 AM
I guess it's the bane of my existence to be misunderstood. :)
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| misinlink |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 04:38 PM
Oh! and he reveals his talent one by one!
Really enjoyed reading that poem Brook, give us some more, im sure you have some in your pocket book :)
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| Brook |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 05:02 PM
Thanks guys.
Nepe: Good to see you after so long.
Najar ji: I try.
Deep: This is an old poem that'd been languishing in neglect in the archives for a long time. Appreciate your analysis.
PremPujari: You're my main man.
Surya and nell: Thanks.
Missinlink: Vous connaissez ma femme? :)
Anyway, autumn is a still a long way off but here's a little piece I came up with about three years ago inspired by the fabulous New England fall.
Autumn
--
The first maple changes color
yellowish-orange, reddish-brown.
Was he a little too eager for a change,
or simply a rebel, unwilling to conform?
As his branches sway in glory
and leaves dance
to the tunes of the gentle afternoon breeze
that seems to be relishing
every moment of this unison,
with the proud Caribbean Mahogany.
And even the squirrels, the 'dumb, indiscriminate' mammals
seem to be using their discretion; patronizing, only, but the boughs
of this apparent King, as if to yield to the charisma,
the majesty of his very presence.
The rest of the foliage writhes and squirms in pain
with envy written on every fold of its contorted countenance.
Restless and impatient, it awaits the day,
the day it shall be able to deem itself on par
to embrace the ostracized.
The day that shall mark, the advent of autumn.
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| SITARA |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 05:12 PM
Brook ji:
Another exquisitely crafted one. Bravo!
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| oys_chill |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 05:25 PM
I still liked the first one! aaba ramro cha ta bhani rahana naparla..sabbaile bhani sake....anyways, keep 'em coming.
"Like ants we marched
to the tune of his wand "
could relate with those lines, but I would have said
" like worms we slitthered,
to the tune of the fate"
ah well! I hope to see more poems like the "first one" :)
Oys
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| Raksiya |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 09:01 PM
Brook,
Very nice poem. I liked the second one.
Where are the poems of autumn? Ay, where are they?
Think not of them, thou hast thy music too,
While barred clouds bloom the soft-dying day,
And touch the stubble plains with rosy hue;
Then in a wailful choir the small gnats mourn
Among the brook sallows, borne aloft
or sinking as the light wind lives or dies;
And full-grown lambs loud bleat from hilly bourn;
Hedge crickets sing; and now with treble soft
The red-breast whistles from a garden-croft;
And gathering swallows twitter in the skies.
Raksiya ko Jiban ^_^
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| Raksiya |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 09:02 PM
Unfortunately, this is Spring
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| Nepe |
Posted
on 03-Apr-03 09:47 PM
misinlink:
>Nepe, that was a very strong sentiment to make. If you say, "yesto poem
>po poem" that sounds like, 'degrading' some really fabolous poetries here.
Thank you misi, for alerting me. You are right. That was probably not a polite remark from me. I watch American idol. Too much of Simon Cowell in me, I guess. However, I have indeed read dozens and dozens fantastic poems here in sajha. So let me correct myself, I have seen a number of yesto poem po poem in Sajha. While I am at it, I want to add this about my own taste of poetrytoo. I like only those that I comprehend. So sometimes even the good poetry escapes me. Especially if they look like paalsi kuraa, I give up. I am also not good with the overwhelming number. In any case, sajha has indeed become a stockpile of WPC (weapon of passionate communication)
Najar:
>Nepe jyu--hyalluu! :)
Darshan hajur, hajurko naam padhyo ki yo geet yaad aaunchha- Najar ke samne jigar ke paas :)
Brook:
>Nepe: Good to see you after so long.
Same here. Hajur pani ta gaayabai hunuhunthyo ni Sajha baata. Anyway, I liked your second poem too. Beautiful. Slightly off the genre perhaps, that reminded me a para of a letter my good friend wrote to his old flame. It goes like this-
&It is getting cool here. We are towards the end of fall. Trees around our place just finished their display of beautiful leaf color before being shed off. If I were a poet, I would be thrilled just to see the color. But I am partially a biochemist who sees nothing but a chemistry of chlorophyll, carotene and anthocyanin, and partially a molecular biologist who sees nothing but the evolution choreographed dance of genes that receives the signal of seasonal change and commands the plant to prepare to go to a low profile in the winter&
Poor him. He should be a poet instead. Anyway, Brook ji, keep your gifted pen flowing. Naya taja pani jaawos. Although those old are timeless them selves.
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| RAJUNPL |
Posted
on 04-Apr-03 01:02 AM
spring
sajha ko fulbari ma tori ko phool
yesai ta haraune manche pare ma ranabhool
tori ko hangama putali ko baas
malai achamma lagyo ajhai kata cha dhumbass ..?
brook bro pani kya rahicha,lagyo malai oosko pani na raicha :)
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| RAJUNPL |
Posted
on 04-Apr-03 01:04 AM
8-mile hereko (random ) kabita ko bahar airaacha.
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